Ilyich
by BarracudaHeart
Summary: Russia is hiding the sad secret that he is slowly dying, and with only so much time left, tries to make it mean something for him and everyone else. Implied pairings of Russia/Liet and past RoChu. Originally named "Do Sunflowers Weep for Cold Children?"
1. Countries Fall

**A sad/sweeter fanfic about Russia trying to make his last months meaningful. Less frequent updates, since I'll be very busy, but as long as people read and review, I'll keep writing.**

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><p>Russia was not well.<p>

He had first been introduced to this fact one afternoon, as he sat up from his reclining chair following a heavy night of vodka. If introduced meant that he had not really thought much of it. He had slouched forward, and had felt an unusual stretch in his concaved stomach's right side. It was not very sharp pain, but it was not a welcome feeling. It felt as though he had gotten a sideache, which he would not enjoy, as they were incredibly uncomfortable.

He rose up from his chair, and his arms swung loosely from his sides as he got back to his senses. He felt the cramp in his abdomen, and giving a heavy sigh, stretched forward, arching his back in as far as he could, and felt the ache ebb off. But not completely. It seemed to shrink away, then return to it's primary state.

He frowned as he took a shaky, drunk step forward, and felt the cramp stick in his side like a rock dropped in a basket. It made his side stiff an sore as he took a step. He stepped forward again, and the twist still remained, persistent.

"Come on little cramp. Move da?" he thought nonchalantly to himself, and he thought nothing more of the sideache, and staggered to his study to work. Or at least start working once he had gotten out of his hungover state. Maybe then the annoying ache would leave. When he left the living room, he felt the ache stretch a little and give a sharper but incredibly brief sensation. He hadn't considered it as anything to worry about really, as of that moment was when the worst of the hangover really began to kick in.

As he reached the study door, he fumbled to twist the knob, but his fingers were so slippery in his drunk state that he had to make three attempts to firmly grip the handle. He swung the door open and dragging his feet to his desk, he slumped his arms and upper chest onto the desktop while his bottom half sagged in the chair. He rested his head on the desk, a normally expected migrane was throbbing in his head. He groaned, hating the effects of hangovers.

"L-liiiiet." he uttered, shaking. He tried to sit up, but slouched over.

"L-LIET. 'Ey, hey LIEEEET!" he slurred loudly.

He was answered by a meek, "Yes?" from the hall.

"I...I uh...I wanna aspr'n..." he babbled, dizzily.

The brown haired nation peeked in the door and saw the tall blonde slumped over his desk, drunk. His violet eyes were blurred a pinkish red around the edges, and were glazed.

Sighing, Lithuania nodded, and said in his naturally soft voice, "I'll go get a couple for you. And would you like some tea? Estonia made a fresh pot."

"Ya yeah yeah..." Russia slurred, rolling his head along the desk from side to side.

Toris' green eyes reflected pity and bruises from the night before. This was one of those times when Ivan was definitely the most harmless. And it was a shame that it was. The other night, Russia had been so enraged for some trivial reason, that he had hit Lithuania in the face, giving him a pleasant shiner on the right eye. He had then drank himself silly with vodka, and passed out. Lithuania's eye still hurt, but he was used to it. He and both his brothers were.

Occasionally, Russia beat them. They were used to it. Sometimes, he'd insult them to the point where a grown man would start to cry. They were used to it. Russia probably could do even worse to them, and they'd probably get used to it soon enough.

Russia would treat them so badly so often, but even so, Lithuania could never truly hate him. Because he knew that the real Ivan was a gentle innocent child, who had been locked out in the cold for far too long, and was having trouble keeping warm. The tragedies had cracked poor Ivan's mentality so badly, that it seemed he was beyond help. Toris remembered how Ivan had once been prescribed pills by a human doctor for his violent mood swings, but they had caused more problems, as the blonde nation began to have convulsions, and was in deep physical pain every so often. So they had to stick with no medicine. Even if a small voice in Toris' mind said that Ivan deserved the pain, he knew it really wasn't true, and that in reality, he was in pain enough as it was.

As Lithuania fetched the aspirin, he filled a cup of tea, and took it to the study. Russia was still slumped on the desk, muttering nonsensical drabble about boxcars and his nose.

Lithuania went over, and tapping Russia on the shoulder, held out the aspirin. Russia looked up, and with a swimmy expression, took the pills and swallowed them. He didn't bother taking the tea.

"Master Russia-?" Lithuania began, but stopped when Russia let his head fall back down on the desk. Giving a pitying smile, Lithuania gently pet Ivan's silver blonde hair, and left the room.

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><p>About three hours later, Russia had gotten over the worst of his hangover, and was able to actually work. He had been mailed the last three months economic reports of his country, and needed to read them.<p>

He had felt better, but was still bothered by one thing, the sideache. It still hadn't left after the hangover, and seemed as uncomfortable as it had been before. He knew he shouldn't have been concerned by it too much, but it still bothered him, since it was pretty distracting.

He began to read the numbers of the weekly average income of the employed in his country. The first few numbers were satisfactory, and Russia gave a soft smile, proud of his people.

But as he read the next few numbers, he realized it had gotten a bit lower. The amount of money had diminished by at least 100. He wasn't too concerned until he read the next three numbers, and noticed they had gone down at least an eighth.

Something wasn't right. Was his country losing money?

Trying to disprove his concern, he scanned his eyes over the graph of income, but froze. It was slowly declining at a daily rate, but the monthly rate was rather worrisome.

"Something is wrong with my economy..." thought Russia, starting to deeply worry. His thoughts were briefly interrupted by Estonia bringing in a tray of tea, humming to himself.

"Hmhmhmhm, oh um, hello Master Russia I brought you some tea...is everything alright? You look worried."

"Oh nyet, I'm just...ah...deep in thought. Leave the tea by the door, and I'll fetch it later, da?"

Estonia nodded, wordlessly and left.

Sighing, Russia read over the report again and again, and feeling his already cramped stomach twist into a knot, he called his boss.

"Hello?" asked a voice with heavy, nervous breath.

"Privet sir. I just got my economic report. I'm not pleased." Russia said seriously.

"Oh uh...I um...was wondering when you'd call about that." his boss answered, wiping his sweaty brow nervously.

"Care to explain."

"Russia, I wish I could right now, but I don't think it would be a good idea...I do need to talk to you though. Later though. In a few days?"

"Very well. Is something wrong?"

"I think it's best that I don't explain it now." he said, incredibly tense. Without allowing Russia to argue, he hung up very quickly, and shook at his formal business desk.

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><p>In a few days time, Ivan was now sitting face to face with his boss, curious to know what was going on. He was convinced his worry was getting to him, since his sideache had spread to both sides, and seemed to be twisting in an endless painful knot.<p>

"Sir, you're going to explain to me what's going on. Now."

His boss sighed, "Russia...you're not well."

"Hm. Figures from my economy reports."

"And it's not just that...people are losing jobs, some lost their homes, and some can't afford medical care. You're just not well in general. It's getting bad."

"Well, can't they government or you do something about it? You did in the past, da?"

His boss rubbed his temples stressed, "With a problem as big as this, it seems it's all going to be a futile effort to do anything. In the end, the countr- I mean you will probably collapse. I'd give at least five, maybe six months."

His stomach sharply panging, Ivan raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean?"

Sighing, his boss said seriously, and hopelessly,

"You're dying Ivan."

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><p><strong>Read and review or Ivan gets hit by a truck.<strong>


	2. The List

**A rather short chapter, but then again, they're going to be a little short every so often. I'll be going to California on Tuesday for five days, so no updates then...**

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><p>"You're dying Ivan."<p>

Russia did not respond to what his boss had just said, still trying to comprehend it. Dying? Could countries actually...die?

"Y-you're joking, da?"

"No. No I'm not. The government is slowly falling apart as we speak. I'm sorry Russia, but there's nothing much we can do."

Russia stared down, and let his thoughts and conscious being melt back into his mind as he reflected on the words. So it was true. One day, he'd stop breathing, and be cold as the ground. He'd lose whatever warmth clung into his body, and he'd lose all conscious feelings forever. He'd never again speak, hear, or see anything on the earth he inhabited. If he died, would he have gone to heaven? To hell? Or just stop right there?

Russia felt his throat tighten. The idea of dying was...rather frightening. He had been alive for thousands and thousands of years, and soon he'd be gone. The other nations would see him die, and wonder how. Many of them were older than him, and they'd probably wonder how much time they had left on the planet. The nations he had wronged...those who had wronged him...what would they think? What would happen?

"Russia?"

"...I...um...I don't know...I don't know what to do..."

"I suggest that you go on with your daily routines, and work until it gets too tough. You'll probably feel sick up to the end."

"Well, ah...I guess that explains my terrible sideache. So...I...have to suffer this the whole time? Damn it."

"Well, I um, guess you could see a doctor and get some prescription for the pain. They'll probably tell you you're dying of some terminal disease or something."

"And I am, da?"

His boss furrowed his brow in thought, "Yes and no. You're dying because the country is falling apart, but your symptoms are occuring as though you were ill. And yet you're not reall-"

"Don't confuse me, da? I get it. What should I tell the other countries?"

"Don't tell them anything yet. If they know the country is weakened, they'll try and attack."

Ivan frowned. He knew that they wouldn't try anything as stupid as that. Even if he was dying, he was the great country of Russia. He worried that if he told them though, that he'd cause unneeded stress. And he didn't want to upset his sisters, or his Baltic 'friends'. If Ukraine knew he was dying, she'd fall apart herself, and he didn't even want to think of how Belarus would react. She'd never let him go, and she'd have a mental breakdown. He worried even deeper about his precious Liet. It would no doubt destroy him, to know that Russia was going to leave him. How would he ever go on?, thought Ivan.

He then excused himself from the meeting, and went to his car. As he got in, he sat in the front seat and pondered. What would he REALLY do during this time that he had left. He didn't just want to go on with his same old every day routine. Because he knew it would often incorporate hurting someone, and he didn't want that. He HATED hurting people. He didn't want to, but it seemed whenever he did, he couldn't control himself. He didn't want his last months to embellish the fact that he had abused those he cared for.

He rested his head in his hands and began to cry. He didn't ever expect this to happen, and now he was at a standstill with what to do. He looked at the dried sunflower on his car dashboard. Its petals were starting to crinkle up dry, and fall off. He picked it up, and with the same arm wiped his eyes. He sniffled, and nuzzled the sunflower with his nose. When he put it back on the dashboard, he saw that it had left petals behind. A teardrop shaped petal was on the flower, making it look like a face with a tear.

Sniffing, drying his own tears, Russia smiled, and said, "My sunflower is sad for me, da? Well don't be, I-"

Russia stopped there. He had an epiphany. Something which he was going to remember for the rest of his limited life.

He smiled, and starting the car, drove home, keeping the grin in order to keep his happy mood.

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><p>When he got home, he made a list.<p>

Yes indeed, Ivan made a list. He had gotten out a pen and pad of paper, and began to write. He had made a list of all the nations and people he had ever met. That took up half of the pad. Then he categorized the names into groups of those he was friends with, those he had wanted to be friends with, those he had wronged, and those who had wronged him. That list made him run out of paper.

However it was a bit difficult to finish, because many of the nations had to be put into at least two categories. And because of his bitter history, almost all the nations were in the category of those who had wronged him.

Frowning and shaking his head, Ivan scratched out that category. "Can't be selfish. I'm trying to do good, da?" he said to himself.

He then sadly looked at the list of his friends. It was very small compared to the list of nations he had wanted to befriend.

"Well...I guess I need to be honest with myself. Nobody's really friends with Russia, da?"

Russia sighed, and thought again, "And I guess I've wronged far too many people..." as he read the list of those he had wronged.

Feeling even more self deprecating, he thought, "Should I put it in scale of how I've hurt them?"

He shook his head, "I don't have time to judge that. I don't have that much time..."

Russia knew what he was going to do. One final project, one final goal. Before he breathed his last, he'd make those last breaths meaningful. He'd be the best person he could be. And those people on the list, he'd be their friend. He'd make up for every horrible thing he might have done to them, if only he could remember them all. He'd absolve himself of the guilt he had been plagued with since he was small, so that when he was gone, he would have left a better impression of himself on his fellow nations.

His thoughts were interrupted by Poland and Lithuania, the former having walked in the kitchen for some snacks.

"Like, what are you writing?"

"Oh, nothing."

"Can I like totally see?"

"No thank you."

"Ah come on! Let's see!" whined Poland.

"What is it Master Russia?" asked Lithuania politely.

"It's a list of the people I'm going to destroy, and if I'm not left alone, you'll be at the very top, da?" said Russia, not realizing that he had just spoken a threat.

The two other nations paled, and left the room. Russia sighed, realizing this was not getting off to a good start. He then said, "Wait, come back."

Poland and Lithuania poked in curiously, Poland rather annoyed, "Yes?"

"I...I'm sorry. I'm not not very well right now."

"Like since when have you?" replied Poland, who rolled his eyes, and left the room. Lithuania gave an apologetic expression, and mouthed to Ivan, "It's okay."

Russia rubbed his temples. His sides were still hurting, but he wasn't going to do anything just yet. Because he knew that he'd have to get to a hospital, where they would diagnose him with some fatal disease and freak out before giving him any pills. He didn't want to deal with it this early. He'd simply wait until he found it absolutely unbearable, then go to a hospital.

He realized too late that it was kind of a stupid idea. Because eventually, it caused him problems. The first week, it was bearable, but one morning he woke with such sharp pains, he made pained faces all morning that had given him confused looks by the Baltics. Then soon enough it was an on and off pain that was sufferable and annoying. Nobody really suspected anything, since he had hidden it so well.

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><p>About another two days had passed, when the telephone rang. The Baltics were playing Monopoly (Estonia was winning) and Russia had been gone all day.<p>

"Latvia, could you get it?"

"I would, but Russia took away my phone privileges for breaking a dish." he lied, just simply being lazy. When Russia wasn't around, he'd be as frank and blunt as he wanted. "Anyway, I think that the person who's winning should get it."

"Hmmmf, fine." grumbled Estonia as he went to get the phone.

"Hello?"

"Privet comrade!" cheered a happy voice.

"Master Russia! Oh, um, hello." answered Estonia. He then asked why he called, and when Russia answered nonchalantly and childishly, Estonia grumbled under his breath, "Oh holy hell."

He continued to talk to Russia more, asking "What happened?" and "When are we allowed to see you?" "Okay, goodbye."

When he finally hung up, he said to himself loudly, "Well for the love of God!" covering his face with his hand annoyed.

"What happened Eduard?" asked Lithuania, as he passed Go.

"Russia's checked _himself_ into the hospital _thirty seconds_ ago!"

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><p><strong>A bit of Baltic humor at the end there. Read and Review or Lithuania gets hit by a bus.<strong>


	3. Patient Braginksi

**Ivan is now a patient in the hospital. See what happens!**

**Parts of this chapter were inspired by Michael Dorris' "A Yellow Raft in Blue Water".**

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><p>Ivan sat in the hospital bed, his face smiling and childish as usual. He was rather bored, listening to the doctor in front of him. He was going on about how Ivan was diagnosed with slowly advancing liver failure in the middle stages, and it was terminal. The doctor was rather surprised when he didn't get a very surprised or shocked reaction from his patient. Being told that they were going to die usually scared the shit out of them. But the violet eyed man in front of him didn't even shift his eyes.<p>

"-judging by the spread, I'm afraid that the longest estimate is about seven months...do you understand what I mea-"

"I'm not stupid, I know what you're saying. By the time the next spring comes, I'll be rotting six feet below, da?"

"Well, if, ah," the doctor cleared his throat, "You care to put it that way,I guess, but if ah, you need counsel for any issues we're-"

"I'm fine doctor, I assure you. I didn't come here to be lectured about dying. We're dying very slowly every single day, did you know that? As we grow, we die da?"

The doctor was speechless, trying to think of something to say.

"And if I may continue, I came here to get relief for the pain. Now if you please? Weren't you talking earlier about painkillers?"

"Well, ah...yes. They'll subdue the pain and relieve pressure on the swelled liver temporarily, but they won't make it any better in the long run. Now if you want to know the signs of when the liver shuts down we can-"

Ivan whined childishly, "I don't want to hear it. Just give me the prescription da?"

The doctor sighed, hopelessly, "Of course, but we need you to fill out papers, so we can issue the medicine to you. Complete with date of birth and ID."

Damn it, thought Russia. He'd have to put in a fake birthday, because they'd think he really was a loon if he wrote that he was hundreds of years old.

"We'll need you to stay put until we can get it here, alright?"

"And when will that be?"

"At least tomorrow morning."

Ivan swore under his breath. He hated hospitals, because they smelled of pee, medical alcohol, and sickness. He hated sickness.

Before the doctor left, he put the diagnostics chart by the bedside.

"You're going to leave it here?"

"Yes, so the nurses can see-"

"Oh please don't do that! If I get visitors, I don't want them to know how sick I am."

"Very well..." sighed the doctor as he took the clipboard and left the room.

Ivan then called out, "Wait! Can you get someone to bring me some dominoes?"

"Dominoes?"

"Well can't a patient ask for something to do? It's boring here da?"

"...I'll get a nurse to bring you some..."

Ivan then wondered if it would have been appropriate to ask for vodka, but before he could, the doctor had speedwalked down the hall.

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><p>About thirty minutes later, Russia was playing a solitary game of dominoes that he had learned from China when they were together. By now, they were in the shape of a chicken's foot, much like one of the feet under Baba Yaga's house from his old books of stories and fairytales.<p>

He stopped when he heard someone walk in. He smiled to greet his guests.

"Privet comrades!" he cheered happily from his hospital bed as he arranged another domino. In front of him stood the Baltic brothers, who stared.

"Um...hello Master Russia..." replied Lithuania, confused by why Russia had checked himself into a hospital.

"They gave me some dominoes to play with! You can join da?"

"Oh of course, but um...could you tell us why you checked yourself in here?"

Russia then said somewhat proudly, "I had an ulcer."

He was proud because he took thirty seconds to think that one up.

"Oh well, um as long as you're alright..."

"But of course my Liet! Oh and Estonia, you came too!"

"I didn't really have much of a choice in the matter, as you told all three of us to come, or we'd get no dinner."

"Haha, you're so silly Esty,da?"

Estonia rolled his eyes, and sat down in a chair. Latvia who was shaking like a tree the whole time shuffled forward and asked, "S-so um...h-how are you feeling Master R-russia?"

"I feel fine now, but I just hope that I don't get an ulcer again da?"

"Do they know how you got the ulcer?" asked Lithuania.

"Stress." he said plainly. He wanted them to stop asking about it.

Thaankfully nobody else said anything, so Russia went back to his dominoes. "Anyone want to play a game?"

"Ah um, sure..." said Lithuania, who motioned to Latvia but saw that Estonia had left the room. He was in the hall kicking the vending machine which had declined him a snack.

Latvia reluctantly pulled up a chair to the nightstand by Russia's hospital bed, and they began to play. Lithuania won the first game when he used all his dominoes, and Russia was winning the second.

"Euh, Latvia, you can't connect a 3 to a 5!"

"But they're both the same color...you connected that red two to the red fo-"

"I said you CAN'T." glared Russia. Latvia squeaked and scooted back.

Lithuania remained silent, hoping deeply that Russia wouldn't snap. Latvia shook terribly, afraid he would.

"Where's Estonia?" asked Russia nonchalantly. "Why'd he le-"

As soon as Ivan had asked where he was, Eduard came back in the room, annoyed. "The stupid vending machine ate my money. I didn't even get any gummy bears."

Ivan smiled, "Oh gummy bears! I love those things! So nice and chewy da? I'm happy, knowing that if you had gotten some, you would have given them to me, da?"

"Ah...yeeeeaaaaahhhhh..." muttered Eduard.

"Oh that reminds me, I can get free ice cream here. Latvia, would you like some?"

"Ah..um...well..."

Russia pressed the call button on his hospital bed's little remote. The speaker asked, "Yes"

"I'd like a couple dishes of ice cream please. You have chocolate, da?"

"How many cups? One? Two?"

"Hell, bring the whole carton." Ivan said, winking to the Baltics. They stared back confusedly. Why on earth was Russia acting so...so? It was as if he was trying to turn his hospital stay into a hotel visit.

"Uhum, Master Russia, out of curiosity, just who is going to pay for this?"

"I am Eduard."

"Y-you mean you're not going to hack into our bank accounts and use our money?"

"I don't see any reason to."

This confused the brothers, who were used to Ivan 'borrowing' money from them. Why was he being so nice?

"I'm just staying until tomorrow morning, I don't think it will cost much,da?"

They silently nodded, and went back to playing dominoes. Eventually a few dishes of ice cream came along. The Baltics began to eat theirs, but when they saw Russia's was left untouched, he explained, "My stomach's not up for it now."

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><p>As they ate, it was silent for a while, and Russia had finally been able to figure out the TV button. So he flipped it on and switched it to a channel. He found some movie on, even though it was halfway through and hard to follow. He didn't want to change on a Russian news station if it would have talked about his country.<p>

About a half hour later, Lithuania gave a silent guesture to his brothers, and they slowly rose out of their chairs. Russia turned to look at them.

"Where are you going? You're not going to leave, da?"

"We need to go back and get some work done. We'll come back in the morning, all right?"

Ivan pouted, "So you're just going to leave me here? That's not very nice."

The Baltics were at a standstill. The guilt trip never failed... But they desperately wanted to go home, and have a little freedom. They hated hospitals just as much as Russia.

Luckily for them, a nurse popped into the room and said in Russian, "Visiting hours are over."

Ivan pouted once more, but then said childishly, "Well I guess if it can't be helped..."

The Baltics all gave a silent sigh of relief, and turned to leave out the door when they heard, "Goodbye hug, da?"

They all paled, fearing the worst. If Russia had them in his clutches, there were endless possibilities with how he could kill them, and in a hospital, even more ways to hide the bodies.

Estonia whispered to Latvia and Lithuania, "I say we all hug him on three, so if he tries to attack, all three of us can hold him down."

"One..." he gritted, "Two..."

They prepared to hug the large nation as they walked toward the bed, and leaned over, "Three."

They wrapped their arms around him, and said very rehearsed, "Goodbye Master Russia."

Russia hugged them back equally strong. But it wasn't a dark, harming hug. It was a friendlier hug, and much warmer. At least that's what Lithuania thought. As soon as they let go, Eduard and Raivis made a beeline for the hallway. Toris was about to follow them, when he turned back around.

Ivan had a lonely look in his eyes, and a sad smile. He sadly waved goodbye to Toris silently. He was sitting up in his boring, unwelcoming hospital bed, his hospital gown decorated with sunflowers (he had asked for it) was barely fitting on him, it looked so tight. Toris looked at the bedside table, and saw his dish of ice cream had melted into the bowl in a pastel brown pond, and hadn't been eaten at all. The blankets were wrinkled and spilling over the side. The white hospital interior made Ivan look so small compared to normal.

Toris sighed, feeling somewhat sad himself by this display, and giving a reassuring smile, went over to Ivan, gave him a hug and kissed his cheek, "We'll be back to pick you up, all right? We promise."

Ivan smiled back, and returned a kiss on the cheek holding Toris.

After a few seconds Toris blushed and said, "Ah um, Ivan I think you can let me go now. I don't want to get you in trouble if the nurses see."

"I wouldn't worry about that. I should worry about getting MYSELF into trouble, da?"

Lithuania smiled, and went after his brothers. Meanwhile Ivan lay in his hospital bed, and realizing nobody was there, he switched to the news. Soon enough they discussed his problems, but didn't announce that the country was going to fall. But he knew that soon enough they'd reveal how bad it was, and he'd have no explanation.

When he got home, he would have to destroy his TV.

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><p><strong>Haha, some RussLiet for the fanladies.<strong>

**Next update won't be for a while, since I'm leaving for California for a few days.**

**Read and review, or next chapter while Russia is trying to destroy the TV, he throws it out the window and crushes Estonia.**


	4. Little Panda

**Russia is going to start in on his wish to make things better, but will they?**

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><p>Ivan found it pretty difficult to fall asleep that night. For starters, his stomach was in pain, and he hadn't been issued the medicine yet. It wasn't the pain itself that bothered him really, it was the fact that he knew what it would lead to. In less than a year, he'd be gone. Then there was the fact that the whole night, he had been thinking of what to do as a starting goal. He had many nations to strengthen ties with and do favors for. But this wasn't going to be for politics. Not this time. He wanted to make things better as Ivan Braginski, not as Russia. If he had ever in his life planned to do it, he'd do everything now. But what would he start with? That's what he had pondered as he lay in that hospital bed, staring up at the ceiling. The white tiles were tinted a dreamy blue in the dark, and moonlight. He didn't feel tired, or have the urge to close his eyes for half the night. He simply kept his eyes fixated on the ceiling, and yet not really focusing on it, as he was spaced out into his own mind.<p>

But soon enough he felt his eyes grow heavy and he stifled a yawn. He snuggled deeper into his blankets, and then let himself go still. He tried to pretend that he was dying. Was dying just like sleeping. Would he just blank out, and never see anything ever again? Or was it like being torn from the body and the soul getting tossed away into the dark void, like black ink bleeding on white sheets?He soon fell asleep, losing all thoughts until he woke again. He had no dreams, and didn't know what had happened while he slept, as normal.

He was woken by hearing someone call, "Mr. Braginski?" He woke, seeing the doctor in front of him, with a plastic medicinal bag with about thirty white tablets that looked like tiny ovals (well they weren't very tiny, they were as long as his big toenail was wide, and were thick little pills) in his hands.

"Good morning Mr. Braginski, we have your prescription here for you. Take one of these once a day and once at night, and whenever the pain gets too tough. And if you run out, you can call your nearest pharmacy." The doctor had a close-to-fake smile on his face, as if he had rehearsed this. It looked very odd and stretched on his wrinkled, leatherlike face.

"Da." yawned Ivan who took the bag in his hands, and the doctor left the room. He decided to start the dosage by opening the bag and popping a pill into his mouth. He swallowed it, but had to swallow a couple times, as it stuck on his throat. He waited for the pain to go away instantaneously, but it didn't. He sighed, almost impatiently, waiting, but eventually five minutes later, he felt a numbing, somewhat unbearable feeling in his stomach, as it reacted. Eventually it settled, and even though his stomach was still kind of bothered, it had tamed to the point where it was bearable. He still felt sick. And he knew it wouldn't get better. He sighed, realizing how he would not be enjoying this. And eventually, how he felt now would be percieved as normal. And sharp pain would be a relief.

He then got out of his hospital bed, and saw that the nurses had been nice enough to leave his clothes neatly folded by the bed. Taking off his hospital smock, leaving his boxers, he took his pants and put them on. Followed by his undershirt, which smelled faintly of laundry detergent. How nice, they cleaned it. He then put on his long warm socks, followed by his boots. He then put on his coat, buttoning the closures. He then looked for his scarf. Where was it? He grew nervous, hoping that he hadn't lost his precious gift from Ukraine. He looked under the bed and nightstand but no luck. He whisked his head back and forth trying to find it when he felt someone tap his shoulder. A plump mousy haired nurse had his scarf in hand. "It was cleaned." she chirped cheerfully, handing it to Russia as he got up.

And at that moment walked in Lithuania, who had come to take Russia home. He smiled politely, and blushing said, "If you're ready Ivan, then let's go."

"Da." said Ivan, not really listening as he wrapped his scarf around his neck. He was planning what to do when he got home. He'd have to start with something that he could succeed at. Something he could do well. And to put his goal in throttle position. It was something that had pained him, but he was determined to get it over with.

He'd call China.

* * *

><p>Yao was laying in his living room on a velvet red and gold couch, petting his baby panda on the ground. He had bought that couch many years ago when he was at a fair with Ivan. It honestly didn't mean that much to him, but it was sturdy, and comfortable. And Ivan had always insisted that it was very stylish in his house.<p>

The panda poked its nose upward, nudging into Yao's smooth palm, moistening it with it's cold wet nose. Yao smiled contently, and took a small shoot of bamboo from a plate on his end table, putting it in front of the bear's snout. The pink mouth opened against the white fur, and little teeth sank into the shoot with a satisfying crisp crunch. Yao smiled, and admired the panda's cuteness as it munched contently on the bamboo. This is what made the lazier days enjoyable for him. He often stayed home alone, but his panda or occassional visitors kept him company.

He was interrupted from his quiet time by the chiming of his phone. Sighing, realizing he'd have to get up, Yao patted his panda's head, and sat up, walking over to the phone. He picked it up and said in Mandarin, "Hello?"

"Yao-yao!" cheered an all too familiar voice.

China sighed, "Russia, what do you want now aru?"

"I just wanted to check up on my little panda!"

Yao sighed. He remembered the day when Ivan had first called him that. It was just a week after Yao had asked him out, out of a crush he had. He had tried to forget for that time that they were countries, and pretend they were just people. Their bosses hadn't wanted it, but they went behind their backs. It was an amazing relationship for what it was, as both Ivan and Yao were genuinely happy, and Ivan hadn't had any violent swings during then.

"I'm fine. How are you?"

"I'm well." Ivan said back cheerfully, wrapping the phone cord around his finger giddily.

"Well why else did you call aru?" asked Yao, wanting to hang up the phone.

"I just wanted to talk, da? I've missed you."

"What, hasn't Lithuania been good enough company aru?" asked China somewhat crossly. Russia physically cringed at that comment. He knew that Yao was still pretty sour about his relationship with Toris. Ivan never had cheated on him, but when they had ended the relationship, Russia had gone straight to the baltic nation, while China had been upset and alone for a long time.

"Da, he's good company, but I've missed my little panda. Aren't you lonely?"

"I'm fine Russia. And please stop calling me that aru. We're not together anymore remember?"

Ivan sighed. He did remember. Many years later, he had felt confident enough to ask Yao to marry him. Truthfully, Yao would have loved to accept, but out of his own stubbornness, and realizing the political outcomes of it would not please their bosses, he said no. This had crushed Ivan so greatly, that he openly said that Yao didn't love him. This had brought on a bitter, raging fight, which ended with them breaking up. Both went their separate ways, and refused to go back together despite how much they missed each other. And in the end, they both said they were sorry for fighting, but still stayed apart. Now any reactions or conversations they had were distant, and avoiding.

"I was going to ask you about that Yao."

Yao's breath caught for a split second, curious. Was Ivan going to ask for him to come back? Because if he did, he may have said yes. Because he missed the one he had once called his boyfriend.

"I was wondering if...we could go back to being friends." asked Ivan very innocently, knowing that their romantic relationship was irretrievable, but they could perhaps be friends like it was before. Before they fought, and ignored each other. Before the most friendly thing they could exchange was a salutation at the meetings, then go off to their own business.

Yao frowned. "I don't think now is a good time aru. You know why." Actually, even if Ivan did know, Yao himself really didn't know. He thought maybe perhaps it was that he didn't want to be his friend, he wanted to be HIS. Not just his friend. Friends wasn't good enough.

Sad purple eyes on the other line, Ivan spoke, "Oh, but I uh...I..."

"Please don't call me again Russia." said China sternly as he hung up the phone. He walked back to his couch and slouched over, absentmindedly letting the panda lick his fingers. He had successfully avoided Russia once again, but why did he feel so strange about it?

* * *

><p>Ivan heard the phone hang up, and realizing he was rejected, felt his throat tighten. Did Yao really not want to be his friend anymore? He hated him that much? He had tried to make his starting goal befriending Yao once more, but he had failed. What would this mean for his future goals?<p>

Disheartened and hurt, Russia got up from the couch he was on, and walked across the room to the TV which was turned off. Without even thinking, he drove his foot through the screen, leaving a large cracked hole. He then kicked the sides of the box, denting it in, and chipping it. By the time he was done, there was broken glass on the floor, and the television was now a mangled mess. But he felt better. Taking another pill from the bag in his pocket, he breathed in, and went to his room to lay down. He couldn't give up, even if he had failed. He'd just have to try that again later.

About five minutes later, Latvia walked into the living room with a glass of lemonade, and saw the broken box that formerly was a TV. Staring at it with no reaction, he shook his head, "Eduard and I _told_ Russia to get the warranty."

* * *

><p><strong>Operation China was a failure, but don't get your hopes down yet! Russia's just gonna move on to someone else.<strong>

**Next projects for him: Estonia and Latvia!**

**Read and Review or I'm making this a terrible Mpreg story. Because DAMNIT I HATE Mpreg!**


	5. Bar Room Blitz

**Russia decides to tie loose ends with Latvia and Estonia. Through bonding (not bondage).**

* * *

><p>"You want to WHAT, Mr. Russia?" asked Estonia in disbelief as he and Latvia sat at the lunch table.<p>

"I want to take you two out to do something." smiled Russia politely as he sipped on a fresh cup of tea. He was moving onto plan two. He was going to now do something for Estonia and Latvia together. He wanted to do something else for his Liet. Something special.

"Any reason you want to take us out?"

"Not really. I don't have much to do, and you guys don't go out to do a lot."

"Well, of course not...we're always really busy, or you are."

"Eh, that and since both your birthdays were months back, and we didn't celebrate, I owe you da? So let's go do something fun for a change."

"Well, um...like what?" asked Latvia confusedly.

"I don't know. Anything you like da?"

"So...no Lithuania?" they both asked.

"Nope. He's out with Poland. Just you guys and me. As Amerika would call it, a 'guys day out' da?"

Eduard and Raivis looked at each other with a sly smile. No Lithuania? Oh this would be fun.

"A bar." said Raivis smiling knowingly.

"Euh? A bar?"

"Yep. A bar. We want to go to a bar."

Ivan tried to think of a reply. He didn't expect them to ask to go to a bar. Especially since Raivis looked so small and young. How would they get into the place with him? And Estonia, he never expected to go out drinking, or enjoy alcohol that much. But then again he never really saw them outside the house and meetings, so he couldn't be certain.

Deciding that he'd never be able to take them out again like this, he sighed, and nodded. "I'll get my coat."

He didn't see Eduard and Raivis highfive each other. Neither of them had been able to go out to a bar in ages, and the last time they did, Toris had been scolding them half the time, and they barely got to finish one drink. As much as they loved their brother, they were kind of relieved that he wouldn't be tagging along on this trip to the bar.

And knowing Russia when he was drunk, he'd either pass out, or go into a huge rage, but they didn't have to fear about the rage, because if they were in a bar, they could escape, unlike the house, where Russia would lock all the doors. And being in a public place, Russia could get easily subdued.

On the drive to the nearest bar, Russia couldn't tell if he was imagining it or not, but he could hear someone whisper, "Yes, yes, yes!" and snickering from the back seat. He didn't see the two baltic nations give a fist bump.

* * *

><p>As they waited at their table to order drinks, Ivan raised an eyebrow, "Eduard, I didn't think you were one for drinking."<p>

"There's quite a lot you probably don't know about me Mr. Russia.", replied the dirty blonde man as he cleaned his glasses with a hankerchief from his shirt pocket. He may not have liked to be a troublemaker, or daring, but he enjoyed bars. But he rarely went to OF COURSE Russia didn't know much about him, since he barely paid that much attention to him. Except for now. And why?

A waiter came by and said to Ivan, "Um excuse me sir, but I'm afraid your ah...younger guest isn't allowed here.", pointing to Raivis.

Ivan threw his head back dramatically, "Why SIR. I'm OFFENDED entirely that you are so PREJUDICED. My SON here just graduated from his college, so I took him and his big brother out for a drink! Why is it that you people automatically assume he's a child?"

The Baltic boys stared confusedly, but then when Ivan lied about the college, they caught onto his plan, and played along.

Raivis then said, pretending to be angry, "I happen to have a growth deficiency, and you're calling me a kid? I'm offended."

He then took out a fake ID that he had been given to protect his identity as a country. It said that his age was 22. The waiter paled, and stuttered, "Oh my, I never realized, I-I'm sorry I..."

"You've said enough. We MIGHT consider not suing if we get something out of it. Perhaps free drinks-"

"For a month? Oh of course!" said the waiter nervously, and went away hurriedly.

Eduard clapped, and said, "Wonderful performances. Extra points to Raivis for the improv."

Ivan frowned, "What, and that wasn't improv on my part?"

"Well, uh...nevermind."

* * *

><p>Ivan, his pain bothering him once again, excused himself to the bathroom to take a pill without his guests seeing. Just as he left, the drinks arrived. Raivis, shivering, was about ready to take a sip from his when Eduard said, "Wait, don't drink any yet. I have an idea."<p>

Estonia wasn't one who was that fond of Russia. After all these years, he hadn't grown much of a liking for him. Especially since he was so violent, and took it out on them. He didn't even know why. He had concluded that it was because Russia was simply an insane nut of a country, and that he and his brothers were shit out of luck to have been stuck with him. Now that they were at a bar, Russia was vulnerable, and the two brothers could get a little payback.

Eduard looked around, and saw Northern Ireland sitting at a table behind Russia's place in a corner, with a docile expression on his face. Eduard then took his mug and Raivis' and walked over to the ginger haired man.

North looked up and saw Estonia. "_Baaa_, hello Estonia, how are you?"

"Fine, hey you want these two drinks?"

"Oh, I'm just waiting for England to get back here, we ordered some alre-"

"Take 'em anyway. You might be getting some more later." Eduard said quickly and placed them down in front of Colin, and darted back to his table, just in the nick of time, as Ivan got back from the bathroom.

Eduard whispered to Raivis, "Quick, act drunk."

As Ivan sat down, Eduard gave a fake drunk laugh. "Whooooeeee! I'm SO drunk!"

Raivis shook, "Y-yeah, haha, me tooooo..." He feared that this was going to fail. He nearly panicked when Ivan raised an eyebrow and said, "I wasn't even gone for three minutes, and you're already drunk, da? The drinks got here?"

Eduard continued, "Yyyyyup! And Raivis and I 'ere, well...we drank ours in three seconds! Hehehe!"

Ivan stared at them longer and deciding not to ask, then looked down at his beer (darnit, he wanted vodka!), then said, I'll be a moment, I saw my comrades England and Northern Ireland over there."

He then got up with his beer in hand, and went over to the table that was in the corner. England was reading a pocket book, while Northern Ireland was finishing off the beers that Estonia had given him.

"Privet comrades! Free beer?" he offered.

Arthur looked up, "Oh, hello Ivan. No thanks for me, but perhaps Colin would li-"

"Baa!" exclaimed Colin, who took the beer from Ivan's hand. "Thanks!" he said tipsily.

Ivan went back to his table, and gave a fake drunk laugh. Because while in the bathroom, he decided that he could play drunk and try and get a better understanding of his comrades. Because he knew that they often were shy around him when he wasn't so if he was able to act drunk and easygoing, maybe he'd be easier to talk to. When he got back to the table, three mugs of beer had been put back in place of the ones that were originally there.

"I-I kinda HIC!, drank mine on the way there, so I'm kind of drunk too da?"

"Oh, uh...yeah...hahaha...um...excuse us a moment, we saw Finland in another room." said Eduard and Raivis as they got up with their beer and took it to Colin who was twitching every so often. As they walked back to their table, they heard him mutter, "Well two more ne'r hurt anyone...baaa..."

When they got back, Ivan was getting up, explaining that he found a hair in his beer, and they sat down. Ivan placed it next to Colin, while Arthur paid little attention. He then came back with a fake stagger, while his 'drunken' comrades were whispering about something.

Every so often, they'd have a new mug of beer, and make some excuse to leave with it, drop it off by Northern Ireland, who was clearly getting drunker by the minute, then come back to the table, faking drunkness.

* * *

><p>Deciding that he could be convincingly drunk enough after a few rounds of the act, Russia then asked his comrades, "H-hey...y-you guys like me, da?"<p>

"Eh?"

"D-do you guys like me? I'm a good caretaker, da? Hic!" he asked, faking the hiccup.

"Hehe, yeah, if beating the shit out of us is good." said Eduard, drunkly.

"Well...eh...I mean besides that. Am I responsible?"

"Hahaha, you call drinking yourself silly responsible?" continued Eduard.

Realizing that this wasn't going the best road, and deciding to change subject soon enough, Ivan said, "So I guess I've not been the best but..."

"You kidding? You've been the shittiest person we've ever had to work for!" blurted Raivis roughly. Eduard bit his lip, realizing how harshly his little brother had said it. He saw the bewildered look on Ivan's face, looking as though he was about to snap, and he leaned over to whisper to Raivis about not taking too far. But then he smelled the alcohol on him, and looked below the table to see dozens of discarded mugs on the ground. How Raivis had ever drank all those so quickly he'd never know, but he realized that his brother actually was drunk, and was not tipsy at all, but very VERY cold.

Ivan hiccuped, and asked, "O-oh really...kolkolkolkol..." he was starting to forget why he had brought them here.

"You treat us like prisoners, and beat us up over your own damn fuck ups!" swore Latvia, who tended to have a sailor mouth when he was drunk. "I'd have died years ago if I wasn't a nation!"

That last one made Russia pause a moment. Had he really been that awful to them? He was only doing his job as a nation. And if he had to use discipline, then he had to.

"Ehehe, Latvia, you shouldn't speak so foolishly. You might regret it." said Russia, the last sentence with a bit of a growl. "And I mean _really_ regret it." he loomed darkly.

"D-don't you threaten my little brother!" snapped Estonia, dropping the facade. "I don't care how many people you've killed, or how much power, if you lay a finger on him ever again you'll regret it! We're nations just like you, so you'd better be nice to us!"

Russia hummed darkly, having forgot his facade too, "And what are you going to do about it?"

"...I...I'll convince Lithuania to leave you, and we'll all leave." said Eduard, somewhat unsure.

"Just like your sisters!" blurted Raivis. The aura around Russia began to fade, and left a child's face of sad realization. Drunk little Latvia was right. His sisters had left him, and either they avoided him, or he avoided them...and it was all his fault.

Eduard had to do a double take when he saw Ivan give a sob. He had never actually seen Russia cry, and never even imagined it to be possible.

"O-oh god..." Ivan whispered with a self realized horror, "Y-you're right. I-I'm so horrible...I'm so pathetic..." he cried.

"Ah, I..." started Eduard, speechless, but Ivan continued, "I-I never wanted to kill anyone, those innocents...I never wanted anyone to die...oh Anastasia..."

Who was Anastasia?, thought Eduard. "I've taken it out on my friends...my family...what have I done to you guys? I-I'm so sorry..." cried Ivan, this time addressing to the Baltics in front of him. Truly Ivan had always been aware of this, but he never got a chance to show Raivis or Eduard how sorry he truly was, and will be for how he had hurt them in the past, present, and probably the future too.

Estonia felt a little guilty now. He hadn't realized that Russia really did care about them, but was so messed up. He really didn't like to hurt them? He now kind of felt sorry for him, as he saw the big scary nation crying like a child.

"H-hey Ivan?"

"Hm?" asked the violet eyed nation as tears were still rolling down his face.

"I-it's alright. Don't worry about it..."

"N-no. It's not alright...I've hurt you both so badly...what can I do to make it better? Th-there's something da?"

"What, like you leavi-mfff!" started the drunk Raivis, before Eduard covered his mouth.

"U-um...howabout...more rational ways of settling things, instead of punching us out?"

Ivan's eyes once again filled with guilt, but Eduard explained jokingly, "The ladies don't like seeing us bruised when we go out."

This made the Russian man laugh, once again lighting up his face, but then he said, "I-I can try...I just can't help it sometimes...I hate it! I-I guess to make the outcomes better when I have another outburst...sigh." Ivan sighed and reached into a coat pocket. He handed Eduard something small.

"What is this?"

"It's a key to all the doors in the house, I've got two other copies for your brothers. I lock them a lot, but if I..." he shuddered a moment, "become bad again...you and your brothers can use it to get out before I do anything to you..."

Eduard said, "Ivan, you're not bad...just really hard to understand. And kind of weird. But at least this shows me you do really care. Thanks." And with that, he kept the key in his pocket.

"Thank you Eduard. ...eh Eduard?"

"Yes?"

"You're not really drunk are you?"

"No. Only Raivis is. Are you?"

"No."

"Oh. That might make things a bit different."

"So...do you think he got the memo about me?"

"Eh. I'll talk to him later."

"Thanks Esty." smiled Ivan, who gave him a bear hug.

"Mff. Ifvanmf. Camft breaf." muttered the bispectacled man whose face was plastered to Ivan's chest.

"Oh, sorry."

Raivis was about ready to lift another mug to his lips, when Eduard said, "Ahh, I think you've had quite enough." and he took it over to Colin and Arthur. The Irish man was shaking irritably, and had a dark glare. A large pile of empty mugs was stacked on his table.

"Ah..." England started as Estonia put the glass down in front of Northern Irealdn, "I think he's had eno-"

"NONSENSE IGGY!" growled Northern Ireland with a drunken sneer. The usually gentle man looked now looked about as gentle as a hungry grizzly bear. "Pass't 'ere Estonia!" and he snatched the mug, chugging it down.

"Oookay. Well I'd better be going." started Eduard. He did NOT want to get on the red haired man's bad side. England said to him, "Next time, give them to someone else. Just not him."

* * *

><p>"You're my best friend, da." started Russia drunkly.<p>

"No, you're MY best friend." replied an equally drunk Estonia.

"No, you're MY best friend." argued Russia.

"N-no. HE'S our best friend." hiccuped Latvia as he pointed at a man walking into the bar, as all three staggered out.

"N-no no wait. ITALY. Yeah, ITALY is our BEST FRIEND." giggled Estonia as he nearly hit a phone pole outside the bar.

"N-no. PRUSSIA'S FIVE METERS is our best friend, and PRUSSIA is our BARTENDER!" blurted Russia, which made all three nations laugh at the senseless joke, and nearly topple over. They were walking, hanging onto each other for support after they had a drinking game. They were drunk off their asses, but they had an amazing time.

Their laughter was interrupted by the sound of England getting tossed through the glass window of the bar, and Northern Ireland could be heard swearing worse than George Carlin from the inside. England groaned something about never taking Colin out for drinks ever again.

"...Can North be our best friend?" asked Latvia with a hiccup.

Northern Ireland could be heard cursing out the Queen of Monaco from the inside of the bar. Estonia and Russia shook their heads.

* * *

><p><strong>I have no clue what this is. So in the end they all got drunk. <strong>

**Northern Ireland, my characterization, I could imagine as being a gentleman and very calm when he's normal, and a violent cursing drunk.**

**Read and Review or a bar light will snap off the ceiling, roll out of the bar, smash, and cut Latvia's finger, which will get infected, and he will die. Instantly. And wolves will eat his remains. THE END**


	6. Tea Time with Belarus

**Russia now tries to make it better between him and his sisters. What will happen?**

* * *

><p><strong>TWO WEEKS LATER<strong>

When Belarus opened her door that morning, the person she had least expected to see standing there was her brother. Especially since he had always distanced himself away from her at least thirty feet. But there he stood, in a old sweater, smiling nervously. His hair was someone a little less bright than usual, but it was no doubt the cold weather that bothered him. Her eyes lit up like fireworks, and she lunged for him, "BIG BROTHER!"

Russia sidestepped, and said, "Hello little sister. I've come here to spend the day with you."

This made Belarus smile like a Cheshire cat, and she said with a glint of lust, "One day? That's plenty of time for us to get married married married..."

Using instinct, Ivan turned on his heel and ran around the corner. She was at it again. As usual.

Natalia, excited at the prospect of her brother staying, ran and followed him, as he ran to her backyard, screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO GET MARRIED!"

Ivan whirled around, looking for a hiding spot, and caught his eyes on a garbage can. He hopped in, and closed the lid on top of himself. He took a breath, and realized that he couldn't run anymore. He'd have to be brave and end her ambition once and for all. He didn't want to spend these last months running from her.

Natalia ripped the lid off of the garbage can, and said creepily, "I found you brother! Now that you're done playing hide and go seek, we can get ma-"

"NEVER." he cut her off, very angrily, rising up from the can. She took a small step back, shocked by his harsh tone.

"Never in my entire LIFE will I ever consider marrying you. EVER. I am your BROTHER, not your suitor. And I wish to be treated as such."

When her lips quivered, trying to find a retort, Ivan continued, saying with utmost seriousness, "And if you ever even CONSIDER trying to get me to marry you EVER again, I'll disown you."

"D-disown me?" she asked in horror, feeling her heart crumble as she heard her precious brother say such things.

"Yes. You'll get nothing. You'll be kicked out on your butt, and I'll never allow you near me or my home ever again. I'll never consider you my sister. EVER. When you try to address me, I'll speak to you as a subject, not as my sister."

"Oh p-please don't disown me dear brother! I'll never ask you to marry me again I promise!" she blubbered, waterfalls of tears falling. She had never heard her brother speak so strictly and so threatening to her. She was so certain he hated her, there was no other reason why he wouldn't want to marry her. Because she had been so certain up until now that she would make the perfect wife for him.

She curled up into a ball on the ground. "Now you hate me." she babbled.

Ivan stepped out of the trash can, kicked off a banana peel draped over his shoe, then bent down and rested his hand on his sister's shoulder, "I don't hate you. You're my sister, and a bond between siblings can't be broken apart over anything." he said, sweet as honey.

Natalia looked up, "B-but you just said you would diso-"

"A sister cannot be a wife to their siblings. Because they give a better service to them. A sister will know everything about her brother, and take good care of him when the time comes. A spouse knows a lot, but not so much. If you married me, you'd break that bond. Don't you understand?"

Natalia looked up, tears in her eyes, blonde hair in her face, and nodded, "Mhm...I think..."

Ivan smiled, "Oh good! Then I can continue with what I was discussing with you, da? I wanted to spend the day with you!"

Belarus' eyes lit up like a child's at Christmas. He wanted to spend the day, with her?

"Oh Russia that sounds so wonderful! Of cour-"

"But I have some ground rules first. One, no asking me to marry you. Two, no forcing me to marry you. Three, don't even MENTION the idea of me marrying you. But I think I covered those three already. Four, no knives. And five, be nice to Katyusha when she gets here. I've invited her too."

"Fine..." pouted Natalia. "So...what were you thinking of doing?" she asked with curiosity.

Ivan shrugged, "Anything you want. That doesn't break the rules."

Belarus smiled mischeviously, "_Anything_?"

* * *

><p>"More tea Mr. Bear?" Belarus asked, as she passed the fake teapot across the table.<p>

"Yes, _madam_." answered Russia annoyed and sing-songy. There were fake bear ears put on his head, and he was seated on a small wooden chair. He was seated next to a large matryoshka doll to the left, and a worn stuffed mouse to the right. Now he wished that he had changed the rules even more, this was so embarrasing.

Natalia smiled as she poured fake tea into his cup. When Ivan promised her anything, she remembered back to the days when she had asked him to play tea party with her, and he ran away, thinking they were incredibly girly. Now that he had been put at her mercy (somewhat), she could have the tea party she never had. She had gotten out her old china tea set, and a few toys and got down to the good stuff. Ivan thought she was absolutely deluded. If this was some sort of kinky, stupid plan to get him to marry her, then he was going to lose it. But he knew that he would not have another chance to make things better with his sisters in the future, so now was the time. Even if she would never let him live it down in the end, he'd pull through.

"Would you like one lump of sugar, or two Mr. Bear?"

"None please." he said, very unenthused.

Natalia pouted, "Big brother, please play nicely. Remember your promise, da?"

"Of course my dear sister." he smiled, "Only if you remember yours."

"But aren't I? I haven't even said a single thing about marrying you."

"True, but putting bear ears on my head, and making me sit down at a tea party? I consider that horribly kinky." he said with a bit of a dry humor.

She hummed while she pretended to stir her pretend tea, "I'm just trying to catch up on the days when I enjoyed these little tea parties that you never came to. And your grumpiness Mr. Bear is dampering the mood of this lovely party. Could you please cheer up."

Ivan yawned, "And if I don't?""

"Let's just say that the Bad Friends Trio will have a wonderful slideshow to look at with the pictures I might take of this."

At that instant, a cantaloupe smile appeared on Russia's face, as he took a pretend gulp, "MmmmMMM! Good tea!"

Belarus smiled, "I knew you'd see it my way brother dear."

* * *

><p>When Ukraine walked in five minutes later, she couldn't help but smile in happiness at the scene, both siblings having a tea party and smiling, (Russia's was pretty large) "Oh how adorable!"<p>

Natalia smiled, "Thank you Katyusha dear."

Ivan, still smiling, gritted through his teeth, "Help. Me."

"Oh Ivan, don't be so stubborn. You look absolutely cute. I need to take a picture.", she said like a mother to a child, as she got her camera out of her bag.

"Katyusha, you too?" he asked in despair.

"Oh don't whine Ivan." she said rolling her eyes, "It's just for me to keep these memories when the years go by."

Darn the photo album card. That meant Ivan couldn't say no, unless he wanted his big sister to cry. So he'd have to give in.

"Oh, da." he sighed, as she gleefully aimed the camera.

"Now smile!"

Ivan managed a sweet smile as she took the picture. But once the picture was taken and done, he asked his older sister if he could take off the bear ears, but her reply was, "Ask Natty."

Natalia said very sweetly and quickly, "Nope." and went back to sipping her fake tea. She liked teasing her big brother like this.

"I should have included no tea parties in the rules." he said, tiredly.

"Should have, but didn't." Natalia said, "Care for some tea Katyusha?"

Ukraine sat down beside her, "Sure."

As Natalia poured her a fake cup, Ivan looked at a plastic plate that was empty. "What's on this plate sister?" he asked, curiously.

"Cookies! Have one!"

He pretended to take a cookie, and bite it, saying childishly, "Yum, air flavored. My favorite."

Katyusha patted her brother's head for trying to play along, and noticed his hair seemed a little less lustrous than usual, the silver glints becoming duller. "Take good care of your hair little brother. It's starting to get a little down!"

"Oh, da." he said, and sighed to himself. The physical effect of his downward condition was starting to show, and soon enough it would be clear to everyone that he wasn't well.

"So how are you enjoying your cookie brother?" asked Natalia, snapping him out of his thoughts. He smiled, and said jokingly, "Best invisible cookie ever, goes great with invisible tea, da? Care to give me the recipe?"

Belarus rolled her eyes, and then sighed, "I wish I actually had some real cookies. That would actually sound really good right now. Hey, Katyusha, remember when we were younger you taught us how to make those little nut cookies?"

For the first time in weeks, Russia, whose stomach had been bothering him, felt hungry, and his mouth began to water for the taste of the cookies he remembered as a child.

"Yes, I remember those. The meringue jam ones? I remember them being quite easy to-"

The younger siblings immediately got up and ran for the kitchen.

"-make..." she sighed. She remembered from the younger days how one of the easiest ways to get to her siblings (or anyone) was through their stomach.

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><p>As she moved her finger along the page of the cookbook, she pointed, and said, "There we go. That's the recipe I used."<p>

As Russia searched in the refrigerator for ingredients, and Belarus checked the cupboards, Ukraine got out the mixing bowls. Once all the ingredients were gathered, Ukraine looked at the bag of nuts that Belarus had gotten from her cupboard.

"This recipe usually asks for walnuts, but I think pecans will substitute fine. Could you take the job of chopping the nuts and grating the lemon rind? And Ivan, can you start mixing up the meringue?"

"Da." smiled Ivan, happy to be helping his sisters in the kitchen, like when he was little. Being like a child almost made him feel more secure, and in a peaceful state of mind. Not a child nation, but a child, with no big duties, or the dependance of millions of people on him. Had he felt even more like a child, he swore he would have shrunk four feet down, and would be on a step stool.

Just as Katyusha was about to put the sugar in the bowl, Natalia sang, "I'm done with chopping the nuts!"

"That's good, could y-"

"Got the lemon rind done too!" she sang, holding up her knife in pride. With her knife, she had gotten it all done in twenty seconds.

With a deadpanned stare, Katyusha said, "Natty, I think you need to take up something relaxing like knitting. Now just give the nuts to Ivan, and leave the lemon rind over here."

When Ivan was finishing the meringue, a fly buzzed past him and he took his whisk and attempted to swat it. When he swiped it across the air, bits of meringue flew off and some hit Natalia in the nose as she walked by. She said, "Hey! You did that on purpose!"

"Euh? What?"

She took the whisk from his hand, and swiped it a little, making meringue fly onto his face. "That!"

"Hey! No I didn't! I was swatting a fly!"

Without turning her head, Katyusha said as she put the little balls of dough onto the cookie sheet, "Please don't fight you two, the less you fight the quicker these will be done."

She had actually found it kind of cute, to see her two siblings getting along (well sort of) like they should. She had actually missed the squabbling a little. Usually Ivan was running from Natalia, but now they were closer than the past years, and were teasing each other. What made it even better was that she was there to share it with them. She had felt bad about avoiding her brother these last few years, even if she wasn't really to blame. Now that her boss had backed away, she had time to spend with her family.

Once the jam and meringue had been spread on the cookies, they were put in the oven, leaving the siblings with twelve minutes to spare. So for the first three minutes, they were stuck in a little bit of peaceful silence, nothing much to do. The silence was broken when out of the blue, Ivan poked Natalia in the arm. She responded by poking him back. After five seconds of silence, he retaliated with a poke to her shoulder. She poked his nose. He poked her cheek. She poked his forehead. This went on for about ten more rounds, and before Katyusha could say anything, both launched into an all out poke war, with rapid pokes at each other. After some seconds, Katyusha joined in, by poking them both at the same time. Soon enough it turned into a three way tickle fight, the older sibling tickling the younger, Natalia tickling her sister. Ivan tried to make a break for it by running to the living room, where he was dogpiled, and all three siblings were giggling like children as they tickled each other.

After they stopped tickling each other, Ivan held both of his sisters in a bear hug. They hugged him back with one free arm, and they let go when they heard the timer ring on Natalia's oven. Taking out the cookies, Ivan took in the sweet aroma, and once again felt his mouth water. For once, since this ordeal, he didn't feel sick at all.

And it was a good thing. The minute he took a bite of a cookie, his eyes shot up, with amazement. These were delicious, even more from when he was young. And when would be the next time he would ever spend such a day with his family? He was pretty sure this was going to be the last time, so he savored each bite. He ended up eating at least six of the little treats.

He spent the rest of the day with his sisters sitting at Belarus' table talking about nonimportant things. Nothing about their countries, just about them as people, and they talked about their lives so far. And for once, Ivan felt very at peace.

Soon enough, then sun was starting to set, so the siblings found it the best time to return to their own homes. Before Katyusha could leave, Ivan hugged her very tightly, trying his best not to cry. Because he was worried that her boss would prevent her from ever seeing him again. Thank god that she didn't start bawling or anything, since she hadn't cried the whole time, a rarity in itself. And just as Ivan went for the door, Natalia lunged herself at him as she usually did when she tried to get him to marry her, but instead, she hugged him with a great force, and she muffled into his coat, "Thank you for spending the day with me big brother."

He ruffled her hair smiling, "No problem Natty." and he left. But before he left, he could hear both his sisters giggling for some reason.

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><p>When he returned home, he was met with some funny looks from the Baltics. Lithuania and Estonia began to laugh, and Latvia was forcing a smile. Russia looked at them, "What's so funny, da?"<p>

"W-well um, for starters, you have meringue on your nose...and t-two...mmmheeheehee...I think you should find out for yourself. I don't think I can BEAR telling you..." giggled Estonia.

If it had been any other day, Ivan would have kicked Eduard's ass for laughing at him, but with the good mood he was in, he let it fly. Much to Estonia's relief, who had been trying his best to stop his laughter. But from what the brothers saw, they would be laughing all night.

As Ivan went to the bathroom to change into a nightshirt and boxers, he felt something on his head. Looking in the mirror, he was surprised to see the fake bear ears sticking out from his hair. He had forgotten to take them out. And the Baltics had seen him wearing them? Oh dear...now they would think he was drunk or something.

Sighing and shrugging it off with a smile, Ivan took off the ears, changed into night clothes, got ready for bed, and lay back on the bed, remembering how great it felt to be a kid again.

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><p><strong>A lot of this chapter was inspired by some irl stuff from when I was younger. My brother and I would fight when we helped mom make cookies. And once I cracked an egg on his head.<strong>

**Belarus still has tea parties? Probably not, but she did this to spend time with her brother, since he didn't join her tea parties when they were children probably.**

**Next chapter will involve Finland, Sweden, England, and to a larger extent Sealand.**

**Read and Review or Belarus makes another batch of cookies which she poisons, intending to drug Russia, but Lithuania eats them, and dies. The minute he picks it up.**


	7. Missing Micronation Part I

**Sealand is missing! And who's getting the fingers pointed at?**

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><p><strong><span>ONE WEEK LATER<span>**

Russia was awoken at about three in the morning to the shrill ringing of his telephone. Rubbing his temples, annoyed, he got up and went to answer it. He picked it up, and grumbled sleepily, "Zdrast-vwee-tye?"

"Russia you wanker! Give him back!" yelled a familiar British voice on the other line.

"Give who back?" asked Russia, yawning.

"Bollocks you don't know who! Let Sealand go you snow sniffing clod!"

"I have no idea what you're talking about England. What would _I_ have to do with your little, not-quite-a-nation brother?" muttered Ivan, who was not pleased with being woken up by the English nation.

"Anything that may happen to him is automatically blamed on you." grumbled Arthur, who was stomping up and down his stairs.

"Oh well that's not nice at all comrade." said Russia, "I was enjoying my sleep when you were so rude as to wake me up, with false accusations. _Kolkolkolkolkol_..."

"Knock it off Russia and let my pesky brother go!"

"I don't have him. What happened to the boy this time?"

"The brat's gone missing, Sweden and Finland can't find him, and I don't know where he is!"

"And you're blaming me, da? Why?"

The British man shouted straight into the phone, which made Russia move his ear back, "Because whenever ANY nation and or micronation goes missing, your face gives it away! SEALAND, can you hear me? No matter _what_ that nutter says, do NOT agree to become one with hi-"

"Don't let your feminine rage drive you to false conclusions Arthur." cooed the Russian darkly. "I don't have your brother, so I suggest that if you don't want your brains beaten in at the next meeting, you should shut up, and let me go back to sleep."

"Well if you don't have him, where do you think he is?" exclaimed England, this time with a twinge of worry. It wouldn't have been noticed by many, but Russia, being Russia, detected it very quickly. He then asked with a mixed smile of taunting and perhaps sympathy, "Are you worried about your brother Arthur? Scared?"

"B-bollocks!" replied Arthur, a shade of red creeping across his face. "I'm just supposed to watch out for him! And how can I do that when he's not there?"

"I think you miss him, da?" asked Ivan. This was met with a loud denial by the thick browed man on the other end. Ivan couldn't help but giggle, England was so cute when he was worried about something.

"I don't even miss the bugger, but I know that Finland and Sweden will have my head if I don't find safe!"

"Oh, I see." said Ivan quietly, as he gave a audible hum of thought, having an idea, "Then I suppose you yourself wouldn't care if I _did_ happen to have him."

"Ivan you're a liar, I knew it! Let him go already."

"If I _did_ have him, where do you think I would hide him in my house?"

"I'll tear down the Kremlin piece by piece if you have him in there!" shouted Arthur, "I swear to god if you've laid any of your fat, ugly fingers on him, I'll hang you by that blasted scarf! I MEAN IT RUSSIA!"

Hearing the English man's annoyed breathing on the other line become more tense, Russia then asked, "And why would that concern _you_?"

"BECAUSE HE'S MY FUCKING BROTHER, THAT'S WHY!" yelled England, his throat tightening with a burning lump.

_Aha. That's what I was waiting for..._ thought Ivan smiling to himself. He then smiled with a bit of sympathy as he heard the English man breathing in heavily.

"I-I have to look out for him...even if he's a pest...he's still my little brother..." choked Arthur, as he tried to hold back tears.

"I-ivan, please give me back my brother. Just give him back...I'll do whatever you want."

"Comrade, please don't cry." chirped Ivan, who could hear the Englishman's close to audible crying on the other line. He had used his manipulation to get the nation to open up, now it was time to make him feel better.

"J-just give hi-"

"If I've said it three times Arthur, then I'll say it forever, I don't know where your brother is."

"T-then why the hell did you hint that you had him?" asked Arthur in disbelief.

"So I could know if you still cared for him, even after all these years. Now, you feel better, da?"

"Ivan, damn you, I don't have time for some therapy bollocks. He's still missing. And all you did was become a hinderance."

"I'd say I helped. Now I know you care for your brother, da?"

Ivan had then found another opportunity to tie more loose ends. If he was able to help find Sealand, then perhaps he could make things better between him and the two Nordic countries, Finland and Sweden. After the winter war, things had gotten rather cold (figuratively) between them. And perhaps he could accomplish double, with England and Sealand in the mix. He had often irritated the British man, leaving things pretty heated between them. And he had never really gotten along with Sealand, the fact being Russia was a powerful nation who had often taunted that he could take over the sea fort.

"Arthur, it would help your ordeal if I offered my assistance, da?"

"I highly doubt you could help Ivan. I can't really say I trust you."

"Don't be too sure comrade. If you could stay on the line for a moment, I might be able to find a clue to your missing sea fort."

Russia then went out into the hall and said in a sweet as honey voice that was deemed frightening by his Baltic subordinates, "_Latviaaaa..._"

Nobody emerged from the younger one's room, so he said a little louder, but simply as if he were speaking in polite company, "Latvia!"

When he didn't hear the sound of the blankets rustling, and seeing the honey-haired boy bolt out into the hall, he walked in, and saw the boy conked out in bed, a book sprawled on his chest, _Cyrano de Bergerac_. That French book about the big nosed guy? Oh Ivan really hated that one, since he had once been caught reading it, and Prussia had seen him with it, mocking how he and the character 'had something in common and it wasn't the poetic words!'

Ivan knelt down besides Raivis' bedside and after watching the boy sleep for a few seconds, then slowly and deliberately raised his finger, and poked his cheek. Raivis woke immediately and gave a little squeal, bolting straight up, and shook violently. Ivan sighed. That kid was a tight spring.

"Latvia! You woke up, thank you! Could you follow me please?" asked Ivan as sweetly as he could, but as sweet as he tried to sound, this made the small nation freeze up in shivers. But he eventually got out of bed, and followed Russia. While he was wondering in horror what type of tortures Russia would put him under, the said nation led him to his bedroom. _Oh god_, silently begged Latvia, _Don't do that, I'm still a virgin!_

But to his relief, Ivan was not going to do such a thing, as he invited him to sit in the chair by the telephone table. Russia handed the reciever to Latvia, who put it up to his ear silently and nervously.

"Latvia, Mr. England is on the other line. Could you please say good evening to him?"

"G-good evening Mr. England." stuttered Raivis, who was now not only nervous as hell, but confused.

"Latvia? Is that you m'boy?"

"U-uum yes."

Ivan leaned over took the reciever, covering the speaker with his hand, and said with a childish happy tone in Latvia's ear, "You are very good friends with Sealand, da?"

"U-um, yes Master Russia." shivered Latvia.

"When was the last time you had talked with Sealand?"

"U-uum...uh...I talked with him on the phone earlier yesterday morning."

"Oh, that's good. Very good, because it's very recent from what has just happened. Latvia, do you know what has happened?"

"N-no, what?" asked Latvia, who was about ready to sweat bricks.

"It seems our little friend Sealand has gone missing. Would you happen to know anything about this? And can you tell Mr. England?"

He lifted the reciever down to Latvia's mouth so he could speak, with an anxious England on the other line. Shaking Raivis said very quickly and nervously, "I-I have not a clue where he is."

"Oh...that's quite a shame isn't it? Are you sure? If you know where he is, then you should really tell us Latvia, da? I can only _imagine_ what horrible things might have happened to our little Peter."

Russia then bent down, and whispered very eerily in his ear, "And what horrible things might happen to someone else..."

Latvia jerked the reciever closer, "H-he ran away! He told me he was going to run away and become a strong nation! He told me not to tell, but I-I...oh..."

Satisfied with having gotten his answer, Ivan said to Arthur, "Well, at least you've got your lead. I told you I don't have him."

Breathing a small sigh of relief that Peter wasn't kidnapped or something, Arthur sighed in defeat, "Alright, I-I apologize Ivan. Thank you for helping us get at least a little bit of a track to him, and thank Raivis for me if he's still there. Now we have to find where he actually ran."

"Oh, Raivis is still here, because he's now going to happily tell us where our missing boy has run off to, da?" he said, looking out of the corner of his eyes at the shaking boy in his red button up pajamas. When he looked expectantly at the boy, Raivis shook his head. Ivan pouted disappointedly, "Oh, so is Latvia not going to help us willingly?"

"N-no I mean, I don't know where he ran to. He just said he was running away. I don't know where."

Ivan's large violet eyes met with Raivis' smaller ones, as if he was trying to see if he was lying. Determining that he was telling the truth, he sighed, and muttered, "Go back to bed Raivis. You've helped quite enough, da?" The boy nodded, still shaking, and went back to his room. If he fell back asleep again, that was another story.

Ivan then turned his attention back to the phone, "Did he ever run away in the past?"

Arthur nodded, "Quite a lot. But he was only gone for half a day, since we found him quickly. He was smaller and easier to catch. But now that he's like a twelve year old, he can get farther, and it is pretty worrisome for his 'parents'." He sighed, "And me."

"And where did he often run for?"

"He was never really certain. Sometimes, he'd run for another nation's house, and try and hide there, for one of his little 'invasion plots' but we often found him."

"Which of the nations? He wouldn't run to a random nation, da?"

"The ones he could actually run or ferry to. Such as France, Spain, Scotland, Ireland, Wales, or Northern Ireland when he was in my care. Or if with his 'parents', Norway, Iceland or Denmark. But they'd usually call telling us to pick the brat up."

"So why hasn't anyone called yet?"

"That's kind of the worry. Now that he's older, he's able to take transportation, such as bus stops or trains, even planes. So he could really be anywhere..."

"So is there anything I can exactly do to assist for this?"

"I don't think so. Just look for an annoying twerp in a sailor outfit parading around Russia. And if you do, dare lay a finger on him, I'll curse you to shrink three feet. Or better yet, Sweden will find out, come to your house, and 'shrink' you for me."

"Don't give me ideas comrade." chuckled Ivan sickenly sweet.

"Hey you sound tired. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine comrade. Of course I'd sound tired, since you woke me at three AM here."

"No,no, I mean, you sound a little weak. Are you alright?"

"Oh yeah, I'm just exhausted after a lot of work." assured Ivan. He cursed himself. He was starting to get weaker, but it wasn't drastic. And he was tired, but the fact he was tired made him even sound weaker.

"Well, thanks for the help, and goodnight. See you at the meeting in a few days. It's in Poland right?"

"Da, that's right. Looking forward to it comrade. I'll watch for your vulnerable brother. Very carefully."

"Oi! Don't talk so scary would you? Well...goodbye."

"Goodnight England." chirped Russia as he hung up. He sighed, looking at the time. It was nearly four AM, and he was tired. But not tired enough to fall back asleep. And he wasn't going to get the fact that Sealand was missing out of his head. He didn't think that if this was one of the micro-nation's 'invasion plots' he'd go to the powerful country of Russia, where Ivan could crush the squirt with the heel of his boot. But knowing that the kid was a pretty cocky one, and a daredevil, he couldn't be sure. He wasn't sure that the kid could get to Russia in the time he had been gone, but he couldn't be sure.

Sighing, realizing he wasn't going back to bed, Russia changed into his dayclothes, and wrote a note,

_Toris, Sealand is missing, so I'm checking around the area for the little one. He can't run very far. :D Anyway, please wake your brothers for me if I don't get back soon enough, and make breakfast. Sealand may run from home, but he can't run from Russia! Kolkolkol... Love Ivan. P.S. Please tell Latvia that Cyrano de Bergerac is a terrible book._

He took the note, and placed it on Lithuania's nightstand without waking the sleeping nation. Russia smiled at how cute he was when he slept, so he pet his hair without waking him, and took a flashlight from the kitchen. Putting on his coat, he went outside in the dark morning, and with his flashlight, looked along the streets of the nearby town for any sign of the boy.

He had to stop once, taking his medicine. The pain was growing progressively worse.

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><p><strong>So this will be continued in the next chapter. I kind of made Russia a little creepier in this chapter (or tried to). He was aggravating England so he knew that he actually could help him and Sealand.<br>And I tried my best to make the Baltics less annoying in this chapter. But it's fun to write them as annoying, I'll be frankly honest here.**

**Aww England loves his wittle brother. **

**The book that was mentioned was _Cyrano de Bergerac,_ a play by Edmond Rostand, about a guy who was a poet with a large nose. He actually existed. And it was a play, not a novel, but there are printed copies of the play out there, so it can be read as a story. I think Latvia would enjoy such a play. But Russia would not.**

**Next update I don't know when, but soon.**

**Read and Review or Voldemort is gonna get introduced in the story. And he kills Estonia, mistaking him for Harry Potter. DON'T ASK HOW HE GETS IN THE STORY. HE. JUST. DOES. (I saw Deathly Hallows Part 2 today. Awesome movie.)**


	8. Missing Micronation Part II

**The search for Sealand continues!**

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><p>Russia had walked up and down the streets, the flashlight scouring the dark area, looking very nonchalantly for the runaway Sealand. He had started with the street where Kremlin was, since it was closest, then weaved down to the next street, closer to town. As he walked through the streets, he knew that he probably would not find the boy on residential streets, but at least it was something. And if he wasn't looking for Sealand, then he could say that he was enjoying a morning walk. And to be honest, he actually was enjoying it. He actually found walking in the crisp air, as the sun was about to rise, very peaceful. But he never got the chance to enjoy it, since he slept in, and there was usually no reason to go out.<p>

When he reached the town that was full of shops and commune, he turned back for home, deciding that searching the whole town would take far too long. When he reached home, he hung up his coat, and went to the kitchen. The breakfast table had been cleaned up, and Russia could see that on the stove, a pot of porridge that was near empty sat waiting for him. He got a bowl, and scooped himself a small bit. Not that he wanted to eat it really, but he'd have to eat if he wanted to stay standing for the day. So he got enough to satisfy his energy levels. His stomach bothered him all the time, and his body was sore, so he somewhat had to motivate himself to eat. Not that he had to force the food down, but it was close. Because he knew that if he ingested only vodka, Lithuania would be sure to find it out, and be by his side all the time (not that he didn't want it, but...)

When he finished his breakfast, he washed the dish in the sink and put it away. Toris then walked into the kitchen, "Oh you're back Master Russia. I read your note...Did you find Sealand?"

"Nyet. I kind of figured that he wouldn't be around here now. If he had run away last night, then he wouldn't have gotten here yet. I just checked in any case."

"Oh, ah, good idea." said Toris, simply complimenting him, as he fixed his tie, and left to do his work. He kind of feared the idea that Ivan was looking for Peter. He remembered the day that Peter had told him he wanted to become a powerful nation, and how he had a big heart. He remembered how he told the boy that other nations that were bigger would want to conquer him, and he would have to get more land. He remembered seeing Russia watching them with an eerie stare. As if he had plans in mind for the day he'd see that boy again. He secretly hoped that Ivan wasn't going to be the one to find him.

Ivan was watering the sunflowers in his study when he began to think back to the last time he had seen Peter. He had been at the world meeting, hiding under the table, when during the discussion on over-sea shipments, he had jumped out from under the table and proclaimed himself the greatest nation and spy in the world. England had then once again lost his temper with Sealand, and asked him when he was going to stop breaking into every meeting.

_Every meeting_. That was it. Ivan put down the watering can and called Arthur.

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><p>"Y'know, I was in the bath." grumbled Arthur, who took off the flowered showercap. "What is it? Did you find Sealand?"<p>

"Nyet. I was just wondering. Sealand breaks into every meeting da?"

The blonde 'tsked' his tongue, "Pretty much so."

"In the instances when he ran away, where would you usually find him?"

"Random countries, why?"

"In any of those instances, did you see him at the meetings?"

"A few...you don't think he ran for Poland's house do you?"

"I can call him, da?"

England sighed, "I guess, but don't get too involved into this, I'm sure he's fine..." started England worriedly.

"I'm sure too, but you can never be sure near my place, da?"

"Gygggah, Ivan! I'm already worked up, please don't freak me out. I want the boy in one piece, and UNHARMED."

"Don't worry comrade, you have my word. I won't touch him. But I might speak t-"

"IVAN."

"Alright, alright. I'll talk to Poland, and see if he's there. You should really watch your blood pressure there, da?"

Before Arthur could argue about his perfect health, the Russian man had hung up.

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><p>Poland was picking out his outfit for his downtown trip, when his glittery pink cell phone rang. Rolling his eyes, he pulled it out and saw the caller ID "The Creepy Ass" that he had put in for Russia. Frowning, he pressed the talk button, "Like, what?"<p>

"Privet comrade. The meeting is in Krakow, da?"

"Uh, duh. I sent out, like, thirty billion memos. Oh it's going to be fab. I've got pink chairs picked out, and the tablecloth has flo-"

"To be frank, I don't care about your faggy decorations. I just have a question."

"Alright, like, geez, aren't we Mister Crabby? What?" snorted Feliks, who examined his nails.

"It seems that our comrade England has misplaced his little brother, or has failed to be a good brother, and he's missing."

"Who, Sealand?"

"Da. He's run away. And we figured that since our meeting in the next few days is in your nation, you might have seen him."

"Seen him? Like the kid just knocked on my door a half hour ago, asking if he could stay here. I told him no, and that he could go play somewhere else. He then was whining about how he, like, was gonna become an awesome nation, and totally went nuts. I told him to go back to England, and that he could go wait for, like, a bus or something. Then he left."

"Where did he go?"

"Like, how would I know? He just walked off down the road. Best guess of mine is like, the bus stop."

"And when does the bus come?"

"Not often. Every couple hours. So like, he could totally still be there."

Ivan smiled to himself, "Thank you my Feliks. Now I can hunt him down."

"Like eeeeegh! England will totally kick you if you hurt his brother."

"Who said I was going to hurt him?" smiled the violet eyed nation.

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><p>Peter had sat his suitcase beside him on the bench. Luckily for him, the bus stop had a bench and a rainguarder on top. So he wouldn't get wet by the pouring rain. Not that the rain really bothered him much. He was used to rain and wetness on his sea fort home. And in Sweden. The problem, he didn't really know where he was going to go. Feliks had refused to let him in, and that kind of cut into his plan to bunk with him until the meeting. He had skipped getting on the next bus, since he didn't know where he was going, and didn't want to get lost. So for the meantime he'd simply sit at the bus station until an opportunity that sounded logical came up.<p>

He was going to show that jerk England, and everyone who had ever doubted him, that he was a nation to be acknowledged. And one day, perhaps the greatest nation of all. Even his parents...they doubted him too, even if they didn't say it. They never really took his ambition to be a nation very seriously, or didn't seem to. Somewhat resentful of being unacknowledged, Sealand huffed, and swung his legs in he looked out at the gray rainy sky, he began to wonder if he would see someone walk up the hill across from him and emerge from the top, and descend towards the bus stop. He tried to imagine who would. Would they be England, yelling at him for running away, Finland, worried and caring, Sweden, silent and unreadable, or someone else? He was so focused on what was out far in front of him, that he didn't notice a large form slip into the covered bus stop, and silently sit down. Not for at least five whole minutes. That was when he heard a deep accented voice say softly,

"For a runaway, you really pack horribly."

Sealand jolted, and turned his head quickly with a start, to see Russia sitting next to him, with his suitcase on his lap, having opened it, and was reviewing the contents.

"R-Russia? W-where did you come from?" squealed Peter nervously.

The tall man didn't answer his question, as he was lifting up a shirt and criticized, "Only one change of clothes, and no pajamas, da? You clearly weren't prepared to run away, even after all your many attempts."

"H-hey get out of my stuff you Russian jerk!" glared the boy. Ivan did no such thing, and he reached his hand into the suitcase, and pulled out an old stitched up ragdoll rabbit, the velvet ribbon on its neck very worn.

"A rabbit?"

"Hey put that down you! That's mine!"

"Where did you get it?"

"I got it when I was born, now let it go!" whined Peter, who tried to lunge forward and grab the suitcase, but Ivan stopped him with a hand in the way.

"Who gave it to you? Someone special da?"

"None of your business! Put it back in the suitcase and give me back my stuff!"

"Not until you tell me who." smiled Russia creepily.

"Jerk England gave it to me, now drop it!"

"How sweet. Your brother gave you a stuffed toy to cherish for as long as you want. When I was your age, I had to watch all my favorite toys get burned in a woodstove, without a single say in it. Including the matryoshka dolls Ukraine made for me. I cried all day.", mused the Russian man grimly.

"Boo-hoo, just give me my stuff jerk!" grouched Peter who was stamping his foot angrily.

"Very well." said Ivan who plopped the suitcase uncerimoniously onto Peter's lap.

"So why do you have that rabbit in your suitcase?" asked Ivan, watching the boy frustratedly close and lock his suitcase.

"Because I like it, that's why. Why does it even matter?"

"I was just curious. You must be grateful that Arthur made that for you. That must also be why you keep it."

"Heck no! That jerk is a pain!"

Ivan frowned, "That's rather rude of you. You should be grateful of what your brother has done for you."

"Why does it matter to you anyway? Why are you here anyway?" grumbled the boy.

"Because when I was little, I was raised to treat my siblings with respect, and gratitude, unlike you, who's clearly being a stubborn brat." sneered Ivan. He was trying his best not to hit the kid, but he was seriously obnoxious.

"I-I'm not a brat! And it's different for me and Arthur than you and your sisters. _Because they actually care_." mumbled Sealand.

Ivan asked, "And what makes you so sure that Mr. England doesn't care? Could it be perhaps that he doesn't let you become a nation?"

"He doesn't let me become a nation, he gets mad whenever I talk to him, and he left me alone on the fort. He only visits for really short times, and he doesn't really talk to me then. He just goes to inspect the fort."

"I can empathise with that. Soviet Union breaks up, and everyone says 'Do svidaniya!' and left my house. I lived alone for a while, and nobody visited me at all. Nobody wanted to see me. Or had reason to. Sounds like it sucks, da?"

"Yeah...I guess." muttered Peter, who was looking at his shoes.

"And I wouldn't be so sure about Mr. England not caring. He called me, accusing me of kidnapping you when you were found missing."

"Why did the jerk call you?"

"Because you're his little brother da? And siblings have to watch out for each other, da?"

"I-I guess. Why are you here? And what's with all the 'da' jerk? Speech impediment?"

"Da means yes." frowned Ivan, not appreciating his speech being insulted. "And I was looking for you. England called me talling me you were missing, Latvia was so kind as to tell my why, and we figured that you'd be in the country where the next meeting is going to be held. You should really be a little more vague with what your motive is when you're running away, or trying to disappear, da?"

"So what are you going to do now? Preach to me about going home? You sure did about that jerk England."

"Not unless you want me to, da? Why did you run away anyway?"

"I want to go to the meeting! I'm not giving up on being a nation."

"Well I should warn you that the minute you become a nation, you will get no sympathy from those who are interested in a populated sea fort to take over. Including me." said Russia grimly.

"Well I'll just have to get stronger! I'll start somewhere!"

"Doesn't everyone?" asked Ivan nonchalantly, as he looked out at a puddle rippling on the road.

"And you were small once, right? How did you get big?"

"Through my pain, torture, and conquest."

"...What else?"

"I didn't give up. And I put my faith into the countries I trusted. Being a nation isn't a one person show. But unfortunately..."

Peter looked as the dark aura enveloped the larger country.

"...While you build alliances, you must also build enemies. Some day, a person you call your comrade, you will have to be at their throat. Even siblings...Nations die. And if you're not opt for the pain, then why be a nation. Even little Latvia had to go through some pain."

"-brought on by you, jerk." glared Peter, knowing that Ivan had terrorized Raivis often.

"Case and point. That's what being a nation brings, as painful as it is." continued Russia, who had only stopped for a second to take in Sealand's lash. "Trust me comrade, with great power comes great responsibility."

"Spider-Man said that first, you plagiarist jerk." cut in Peter.

"I don't read of Alfred's capitalist heroes. But just know that the day you become a nation, the other nations, including those you care about, will all be watching for you to be vulnerable. You should probably take these words into very careful consideration, as they are coming from me, the largest nation, da?"

"Hmf, I guess so. I thought you said you weren't going to preach?"

"I was preaching? I highly disagree comrade. I was simply telling you the sweeter truth of the perils of being a nation."

"Well you were small and tiny once, like me, and you became a nation all the same. And so did Alfred! So if I just take into consideration what you and everyone else warns about, I'll be fine!"

_No my boy...you'll be far from fine_., thought Russia with a twinge of bitterness from his past.

It was silent for a while, and Ivan then commented, "You remind me of myself when I was younger. Except I wasn't such a brat."

Peter rolled his eyes, "How? Were you a sea fort?"

"Nyet. I didn't give up, just like you. And I kept trying. One day maybe you'll eventually become a country like me."

"What, I'll be a giant scary jerk who has a speech impediment?"

"Nevermind."

* * *

><p>It was quiet for a while. Not unsettling, but silent. Peter was the first to speak.<p>

"Mr. Russia?"

"Da?"

"You're not going to tell my parents or England where I am, are you?"

"Not unless you want me to. You should probably do it. They're no doubt worried about you. And they're going to be no doubt even more worried once they know I'm watching you, da?"

"Mm. I think I want to call jerk England. Can I use your cell phone?"

"It's in Cyrillic. Just tell me the number and I'll give the phone to you."

Peter told him the number, and once it was punched in, he took the phone. Ivan watched as the boy waited for the call to go in. He didn't know what was going on really, or if Arthur had answered. He then knew he had when Peter said softly, "Hi."

After some few seconds, Peter said, "Russia's with me. I'm fine."

Ivan tried his best not to listen into the conversation, but he heard buzzing from the speaker that was no doubt the voice of England on the other line.

"I'm in Poland."

There was a louder buzz on the phone, and Peter visibly winced, "I know, I'm sorry."

The buzz got louder, and the boy winced, and drew himself up into a ball. He then choked out in a shout, "I KNOW, I'M SORRY ALREADY!"

Peter's face was red, and he was starting to cry, drawn up in a ball, and he simply listened to his brother. Ivan could take a guess that Arthur had been yelling, and was starting to calm down. Peter whimpered, "I'm really sorry Arthur, for scaring you."

For a while Ivan couldn't hear much from the phone, but it was clear the boy could, as he was curled up on the bench, and he was breathing as though his throat was tight, tears starting to dry. He sniffed every so often. He then smiled a little, "I know...I-I'll try not to...no promises though."

A little pause, "I love you too jerk. Bye." He hung up the phone, and handed it back to Ivan, who didn't even ask what happened.

"He was crying too." commented Peter. "I think he missed me."

"Of course he would. He's your brother, da?"

"Mr. Russia?"

"You can call me Ivan comrade."

"Ivan, can I call my parents to pick me up?"

"How about we do that at my house, so it's a little easier for them to find, da?"

"Fine. Just don't lock me in any torture chambers or something."

"No, the refridgerator will work fine."

Peter went blank a moment, before he heard Ivan laugh jokingly. He then followed the Russian back to his house. He couldn't help but notice him limping very slightly.

* * *

><p>"RUSSIA OPEN THIS DOOR NOW!" shouted Finland who banged on the door, only imagining what horrible things he had done to Sealand. He got out of the way when Sweden swung his foot, and kicked the door over. Russia walked into the foyer, and said disappointedly, "You're really impatient Berwald, da?"<p>

"G'me back m'son.", grumbled Sweden, not in a pleasantly humorous mood, as he no doubt usually was.

"Oh, da. Come in." invited Ivan, who was nearly trampled by Berwald and Tino, the latter shouting, "Peter! Where are you?"

"In here mama!" cried a voice. Both nordic countries ran into the kitchen and saw an unbelievable sight.

"Hee hee, that Dilbert." mused Peter, as Raivis translated the cyrillic comics page of the paper that was splayed on the kitchen table. They were drinking some tea, and laughing over that day's comics.

"Oh hi! I was waiting for you!"

"Peter Kirkland! Don't you ever think of running away again! You could have been hurt or kidnapped by someone dangerous like ah-..." Finland looked at Russia who was smiling by a confused Sweden, "...by someone very very bad!"

"I'm sorry mama."

"You should be. And Sweden will give you a good talking to once we get home!"

"Uhm...y'h." said Sweden, who was a little confused with how his son was unharmed in the Russian's home.

"Well I gotta go it looks like Latvia. Thanks for the tea!" cheered Peter who walked towards the front door with his puzzled parents.

While the two nordics were greeted a kindly goodbye from Ivan, Peter waved, "Bye Ivan, and thanks for letting me stay!"

"Oh da! Have a safe trip back comrades! See you at the meeting!" he smiled sweetly. And with that, he closed the door on the two nations and their 'son', leaving them without a single answer as to what the hell they had just witnessed, and what the hell had happened.

Ivan then went back to his book, which he had been reading, on how to care for sunflowers in the snow. When he died, he wanted sunflowers everywhere.

* * *

><p>Ten minutes earlier, before Sealand had left, the micronation had asked Latvia in the kitchen as they sipped their tea and read the paper, "Hey, is Russia okay?"<p>

"Yeah, if okay means unchanging, then yes. Why ask?"

"...When I was with him, he seemed kind of sick..."

* * *

><p><strong>So yaaay! Sealand has been found, and things are better between Russia and England...Sweden and Finland are still kind of confused as to what the hell just happened.<strong>

**The scene with the comics comes from my life. My neighbors across from me and they're my friends often read their comics at the kitchen table and drink ovaltine or something, so whenever I go there, the comics pages is splayed out and someone's reading it. **

**Next up, is AMEEEEERICAAAAAA. **

**Read and Review or Sealand has just drunken poison tea.**


	9. The Sunflower State Part I

**Russia's plans for America are...does he even have plans?**

* * *

><p>At the world meeting, Russia had arrived fairly early, as usual, and had decided to sit at his chair, and perhaps plan his next goal. After he had spent time with his sisters, he had been left at a standstill with what to do. Sealand had been somewhat of a quick opportunity, but now he didn't know what to do next. He knew there were countries he had left on his list, but he feared he wouldn't get to the ones he knew were most important. There were still at least three big goals, and the rest of the nations would be smaller goals.<p>

He heard footsteps coming towards his chair, so he folded up his list, and put it in his pocket. He turned his head to see Finland in his business jacket, walking to him, with a blank expression. For a nation who was so intimidating, Russia was a little nervous about Finland walking over to him, since they had never really gotten along, and since he had been looking after Sealand, he might be upset.

"Oh, privet comrade. How can I help you?" Ivan greeted as kindly as possible, since he often spoke intimidatingly to the Nordic country.

Tino hesitated before he spoke, licking his dry lips, "I just wanted to speak for Berwald and me, and say thank you for finding Peter. And ah...keeping him out of harm for us."

"No need to thank me, da? I'd be scared just as much if Raivis had um...disappeared."

Tino couldn't really believe the last statement, but he was still grateful of Ivan. Even if he was still a creepy person, he at least didn't harm Peter, and Peter was pretty happy it seemed.

"Well ah...thank you again. I'd better go find my seat." concluded the Finnish man. Then he walked on to his seat, that was farther down the table. From the corner of his eyes, Ivan watched him walk down, and sit down next to Berwald, who was looking down at a piece of paper. The Swedish man then turned his head to look across to Ivan, who was pretending not to notice him. He didn't want to have a staring contest now.

* * *

><p>Soon, in walked more countries, including Taiwan, Korea, and China. America followed suit, sipping out of a Coca-Cola cup, and sat a couple seats away from China. China took his seat across the tablt from Russia, but did not look at the man across from him, or make eye contact. Russia watched as his former love had his hands folded, and he stared at the table. He could see the top of his head, his dark brownblack hair perfectly parted, and shining. It wasn't like Russia's that was slowly becoming a dusty silver blonde, and incredibly dull. Ivan could not see the golden irises of his eyes at the angle his head was, but he could see his eyes blinking every so often as he stared at the table. Wanting to at least get a greeting from him, Ivan called, "Privet Yao!" with a happy smile. Yao blinked out of his stare, and looked up to see the Russian. He shifted his eyes down to the table, and lifted his hand up in a half hearted wave. He looked back down at the table, not saying anything or looking at Ivan again.

Ivan tilted his head, and then said, "Aren't you going to say hello Yao? I missed you since the last time we talk-"

"Russia, could you just leave me alone aru?"

"But I was just saying hello, da?" said Ivan, trying to stay calm and cheerful, "I'm just trying to be po-"

"If I wasn't clear enough when you called me a couple months ago, then let me be even clearer now aru. Leave me alone, I don't like you anymore." grumbled Yao, who then left the table, excusing himself for water. Ivan, feeling his heart crack at the base, swallowed, feeling a lump forming in his throat, and tears of disappointment threatening to leave his eyes. He let his head sink on the table, cushioned by his arms, which hid his face. Well this was sure a good start to the meeting, since he already felt sad now. He was glad his face was hidden, so he thought nobody would see him despair over Yao's harsh words.

America had seen the whole thing, and felt kind of bad for Russia getting rejected like that. He and Russia weren't really friends, since the Cold War, and the space race, but since the Russian-American relations had been somewhat strenghtened in the recent years, he didn't really hate the guy, or really have a good reason to. And he kind of felt sorry for the Russian's history, and what he had to go through, so he may as well give him a little sympathy.

A minute later, Ivan felt something tap his arm, and looked up to see a folded piece of glossy paper by his arm on the table. It looked like a fast food coupon. Ivan looked up, and saw Alfred looking over to him. He looked at the coupon for a free hamburger, and saw that it had expired two years ago. He frowned and said to Alfred, "If you're going to give me a coupon comrade, it should at least be valid for me to use, da?"

"No,no, open it! There's something written on the back." replied the American, who was fishing out the ice in his soda cup, "I know you hate fast food anyway."

Ivan looked down, and unfolded the coupon. On the glossy backside, written in pen, was a little note, _Don't worry about China, bro! He'll cool down soon enough. Cheer up! :D_

Ivan raised an eyebrow, and looked over to Alfred, who was tilting his cup upside down to get the ice stuck on the bottom, but it slid down and landed on his nose. The violet eyed man rolled his eyes, and said, "A consolation note on a fast food coupon. How uplifting."

"Hey at least be grateful." replied Alfred, who was cleaning his glasses from the sticky ice water.

"And I am. Thank you comrade."

China came back to his seat, and snuck a glance at Russia, and felt a little guilty now for having been rude to him, when he saw the tinge of red around his eyes. But he didn't want to apologize, because he'd just feel even worse about it. He just decided to ignore it.

Soon enough the meeting started, and everything that usually happened went on. Sealand had tagged along on this meeting, but he didn't interrupt, surprisingly. He was seated in an extra chair, with a self made nametag. He seemed to be soaking everything in. As usual America had some hairbrained ideas, which were rejected. But at one point during the meeting, he had said something that caught Russia's attention, "Right now, since it's summertime, a lot of my states have a bunch of flowers in bloom. There's a sunflower festival in Kansas right now, the plants are getting really beautiful. But there's a really bad heatwave, so the midwestern states are complaining with me right now."

Russia's eyes went wide at hearing how there were sunflowers in Kansas, and that they were beautiful. He had never been to Kansas, even though the sound of it was his dream. Warm and full of sunflowers. He had never been able to go because he was either too busy, or America threatened that he would tell all his states to gang up on him if he found him there. But he only had so much time left...and he hadn't done anything for America.

This left him with an idea.

* * *

><p>After the meeting was over, America had left rather quickly. Russia could not see where he went, and cursed himself for missing an opportunity. He saw England packing up his things, and walked over to ask him where America went. England saw him and gave a polite smile, "Good day Russia, how are you."<p>

"I'm fine. So our little friend Sealand came along today, da?"

"I promised that he could sit in on the meeting if he behaved, a rarity in itself there. Thanks again for finding him."

"No trouble. Could you possibly tell me where Mr. Amerika went?"

"I wouldn't know. With his bottemless pit of a stomach, my best guess is the meeting hall's cafeteria?"

"I'll check there, thank you comrade. Do svidaniya!" excused Ivan who went out of the room, down the hall to the cafeteria.

As they assumed, Alfred was in the cafeteria eying the food with a pout, "All this polish food, and not one single hamburger!"

Ivan came up behind him silently, and tapped his shoulder, which made the American jump with a 'girly' scream. He turned around and exclaimed, "Jesus christ Ivan, don't sneak up on me like that!"

"Sorry comrade, I just wanted to talk."

"Ah...sure. About what?"

"I just wanted to ask about your Kansas sunflowers. Are they really that pretty?"

"Are they pretty? Fuck yeah, they're gorgeous. They beat your Soviet ones by a million miles, in my opinon."

"Please don't call my flowers Soviets. Because they're not."

"Fine, fine, sorry. But my sunflowers would make you never want to leave Kansas if you ever went there."

"I'll take your word for it comrade. And I have one more question."

"Shoot."

"Will you let me see Kansas soon?"

"I don't think so." said Alfred as he shook his head. It wasn't that he was busy, but that he just didn't want to spend much time with Ivan, who in the past had been a pain in the ass.

"But comrade, you said there's a sunflower festival, and I've never been to a place with so many sunflowers. Or that is so warm."

"Ivan, the festival ends tomorrow, so if I did let you visit me in Kansas, it would be over."

"But the sunflowers would still be there, da?"

"Of course they would."

"So why can't I go?"

"I don't really let anyone visit my states unless it's for meetings. Only Canada, 'cause he's my bro. And France, because there's Louisiana."

"I just want to see the sunflowers..."

"Yeah, yeah, I get that but-"

"It's my dream to be in a warm place surrounded by sunflowers."

"You could always hope for a heatwa-"

"The sunflowers back at home aren't faring very well."

"Well I don't-"

"Please comrade? I'd never ask again, da?" pleaded Ivan quietly. _I won't ever have time in the future_., he thought. Because his condition was getting worse, he knew it would only be a matter of time until he couldn't travel.

Alfred took a long look at Ivan. The blue eyed man could see the silent pleading, and anxiousness in the violet eyes. He then noticed then and there that the Russian man was also more pale than usual. And his hair was pretty lackluster. The American couldn't tell if it was because Ivan was ill, or if his eyes were just trying to guilt him, but either reason made Alfred rethink his decision. He sighed and smiled, "I can see if I can get you a ticket in the next couple weeks. If I can, then you can come fly over for a few days."

He was lifted off the floor in a huge bearhug from Ivan. "Ackkkk...You're welcome big guy...you can let me go now..."

Ivan let him go, and was beaming at the fact his dream was going to come true. That, and though Alfred didn't know, he would accomplish an even bigger goal.

"I-I eh, look forward to it." said Alfred nervously, still not so sure that he had made the right decision.

* * *

><p>"Are you sure your house will be okay brother?" asked Belarus as Russia packed up his suitcase.<p>

"Sure as anything sister. Lithuania will handle it." assured the tall man as he folded the short sleeve shirts and tank tops that he had buried in his closet, and he put them in his suitcase. He now at least had a use for them. He had also packed tennis shoes, and looser summer pants. Things he rarely used at his home.

"But brother, that loser would kill your goldfish if you left them with him! Are you su-"

"Yes Belarus, I'm sure. You don't need to worry about anything, I'm just going to be gone for five days."

"But brother you look so pale!"

"Then the sun will do me some good, da? Now I have to be at the airport by tomorrow morning. I need to get my boarding pass printed out, and then make sure my cat has food."

"I could feed Sunflower..."

"Liet will take care of everything, so please stop trying. I know you want to help, but I don't need it."

As he was about to lock the suitcase, he heard a meow from under the lid. He sighed, opened it up, and scooped his brown chubby cat out of the suitcase, not realizing he had crawled in there. He stroked Sunflower's ears, while the purple eyed cat purred contently. Ivan wondered if cats really had nine lives, and how many Sunflower had left. He hoped that one of his lives would be there in the afterlife, because he was going to miss him.

When he printed out the boarding pass, he was confused that the airport was in Missouri, and called America.

"That's because the closest airport to our starting place is in Missouri. It's not that bad of a drive."

"'Our'?"

"Yeah! You didn't think I was gonna let you wander Kansas like a confused tourist, did you? If you were ever gonna come over here, I was gonna give you the grand tour of my favorite places here!"

"Oh, ah, thanks." Ivan smiled, because he had been hoping that Alfred would join him. Then he could do something for the younger nation.

"No probs bro. I'd advise that you not bring your coats or anything, because the minute you step outside, you'll fry. And bring sunscreen and sunglasses, and perhaps a hat. So you don't burn. I think you need the sun there Ivan. You were really pale when I last saw you, and your hair looked awful!"

"Oh, ah, da." agreed Ivan, who was writing what to buy at the pharmacy when he refilled his prescription that night.

"And I'd leave the scarf at home. So you don't sweat into it like crazy."

"No way in hell comrade." replied Ivan protectively, stroking his scarf.

"Suit yourself. Just don't complain when you're frying your ass in the heat."

"I won't complain comrade, since I'm going to be soaking this all in."

"'kay well get a good night's sleep, and I'll be there to pick you up at the airport, okay?"

"Da."

"See ya dude!", cheered Alfred who hung up the phone. He had actually decided that morning that it was best that he showed Ivan Kansas, since he knew it best. He also knew he'd feel bad if Ivan got lost or didn't know where to go to find sunflowers and whatever else. And for the fact that it would have been kind of fun to take a vacation anyway.

* * *

><p>Russia was no doubt incredibly tired when he got off of the plane. The flight had been long, and not being the best traveler on planes at this moment, he didn't get much sleep. To make matters worse, the time zones were absolutely confusing. It was near midnight in Russia when he landed in Missouri during the afternoon, so he was about ready to fall asleep. And yet he couldn't, being excited about taking the trip of his dreams.<p>

When he had collected his suitcase, he walked out of the gate, and saw America waiting for him. The blond haired nation was wearing a gray tank top and jean shorts with flip flops. Next to him stood a teenage girl with very dark blonde hair in a braid, wearing work jeans, a gingham checked blouse and bandanna, blue and red respectively, and boots caked with dry mud. In her hair sat a sunflower hairclip.

Alfred looked around, and finally recognized the Russian, giving a big crazy wave to him as he walked over.

"Hey Ivan you made it! I can barely recognize you in a short-sleeve shirt and those pants!"

"Euh, comrade, your timezones here are crazy. I could barely fall asleep on the plane."

"Eh. You can take a nap in the car if it'll help. I'd like you to meet my daughter, the State of Kansas, or Emma."

Ivan smiled at the girl, "Pleased to meet you Kansas."

She replied cooly, "Call me Em. So you're the guy my pa was talking about?"

"I assume so."

She took a look at him, and said, "You don't seem like 'the commie from hell' to me."

Ivan gave an unamused glare to Alfred, who smiled nervously, "They say the darndest things."

Ivan then asked, "So where are you taking me first?"

"Well we're gonna drive to Em's place in Lawrence City, about an hour from here, have dinner, then drive to Emporia to stay for the night. By the time we get to Emporia, it'll be nightfall."

"Will we see sunflowers?" asked the violet eyed man excitedly.

Em tilted her head in thought, "I don't think there are any fields on that part really. There are a bunch when you drive around Topeka and near Newton. Alfred will definitely drive you around there."

"So you wouldn't mind if I took a nap in the car, da?"

"Naw, I wouldn't mind. I'd wake you up if there was something worth seeing." Em replied.

Theway to Lawrence is just a bunch of dry rock and roads. No sunflowers." commented Alfred, who was looking at his watch.

"Da, okay." nodded Ivan, who let out a yawn.

They climbed into America's car out front, a blue Toyota, and they drove off. Ivan realized that Alfred wasn't kidding when he told him about the heat, because the minute he walked out there, he felt like he had been thrown in front of a gigantic car radiator. But the air conditioner petered out the extreme weather, and he was able to fall asleep. He dreamed of his sunflower field, which made him smile.

Alfred had been driving, while Emma sat in front giving him directions. She wouldn't be joining him and Ivan on their trip, but she was hoping them the best, knowing that even if her dad WAS the United States of America, he was not the best at interpreting maps of his own states.

When they crossed the Missouri-Kansas border, the Missouri river, Alfred looked in the rearview mirror to see Ivan peacefully sleeping in back.

_Welcome to Kansas, Russia._

* * *

><p><strong>So this is part one to Russia's trip to Kansas. The personification of Kansas, I named EmmaEm after Auntie Em from the Wizard of Oz, and the Emma Chase Cafe in Cottonwood Falls. A lot of this trip will be inspired by my real life road trips in Kansas. **

**Haha, and Russia's cat Sunflower is the Russicat from the Nekotalia shorts. **

**For those wondering, Russia doesn't really know just yet what to do for America, but he'll think of something!**

**Read and Review or a tornado takes the car to Oz, and when America gets out of the car to read the map, he gets crushed by a falling house, leaving his feet sticking out. The munchkins then all start singing.**


	10. The Sunflower State Part II

**Kansas trip part two!**

* * *

><p>Russia had woken up about twenty minutes later, jostled awake by a pothole. He looked out the window, and saw the golden wheat fields laying serenely out on the plain. They weren't waving like oceans, but were pretty still golden sheets as the car sped along. He had never seen such plentiful fields in his home, so he was amazed. Eyes wide, he said, "Wow, those are pretty, da?"<p>

America looked in the rearview mirror, "Oh you're awake? And yeah those are pretty eh?"

"Why didn't you tell me you had wheat fields like these? You should have woken me up so I could see them, da?"

"What, you don't have these in Russia?"

"Not as nice as these."

"Well don't worry Ivan." assured Kansas, "You'll see plenty of these on your trip."

"Da, I'll take your word for it then." Ivan smiled. He continued to look out the window, and saw that the fields eventually changed into green planting rows. "What kind of plants are those out there?"

Alfred answered, "I think those are some potatoes or some other type of low growing plants. There are a bunch of crops in this part of the country, and they rotate them out every so often."

"I see a lot of these crops sometimes in Ukraine. But I don't quite know which are which." commented the Russian, who placed his hand on the heated glass of the car window. Even though the inside of the car was air conditioned, he could tell it was hot out by feeling the window. Looking out the window, to his left, he could see a large tall, periwinkle object sticking out of a grove of trees. It came up like a stick and had a large round bubble-like top. On it in big black letters read "Lawrence".

"Is that a water tower?"

"Yep, and we're just about in Lawrence. About ten more minutes, and we'll have reached my place. I live just past the University of Kansas." answered Emma, who was flipping through channels on her father's car radio.

"Em, don't change it, I was listening to that one station. The one with the GOOD music."

"Pa, you know I'm not going to let you win. I wanna listen to some country."

"Fine." he rolled his eyes as he drove onto the exit to Lawrence City.

As they drove past the Missouri river, they drove through a street of the city. Ivan admired the brick sidewalks and streetlamps, even though he didn't recognize a single store or restaurant on the street.

"What do you think Russia?"

"This place is ah...unique Amerika. I don't recognize any of these kinds of places."

"The KU students are able to walk down to town a lot, so a lot of these places are meant to be oriented for them too." explained Em, who was looking ahead at the red light.

"Maybe if we have time when we drive back here Ivan, I can show you some places here."

They drove further, and Em pointed to the buildings on the hill to the right, "That's the residence halls for KU. It's pretty big."

What amazed Ivan even more was that the grass on the hill was not green and lush, but dry and dehydrated. Meaning hot weather. He was so fascinated by the heat here, he wished he could move here.

They evenutally turned down a street into a neighborhood, and after some searching, and Em pointing out directions, Alfred finally parked in front of her house. Compared to Ivan's home, the Kremlin, it was very small, a simple residential house. One story, blue, with a screen door. They got out of the car, and while Kansas unlocked her door, Alfred pointed out to Ivan, "One good thing about the homes around here is that they are usually under these big clusters of oak trees and osage orange trees. So they're in the shade, keeping you nice and cool."

"Osage orange?"

"It's a little hard green thing that smells like an orange that grows on some of these trees. You can kind of smell them now." he sniffed.

"Mmm, you're right." smiled Ivan, "It makes it a very pleasant environment, da? But it's not as cool as you said. It's very humid."

"Well compared to when you're standing out in one of those open fields or whatever, it's an oasis."

They went inside and sat down on a couch while Emma prepared dinner. Alfred asked, "Need help?"

"Nope Pa. I'm fine." she insisted. Alfred sighed, and took out a large map of Kansas, scanning it over very intently.

As Ivan sat on the couch, he looked out the window into the backyard, and saw the green grass looked so nice and cool, with little dry patches. Sun filtered through the leaves on the trees in back and overhead. He saw a small birdhouse pented onto a metal pole in the ground. There was a concrete patio, with a metal framed table, glass top, and a lantern on top of it to see at night. A can of bug spray lay on its side near it. A wooden awning painted white lay against the house's wall, and dried tomato plants snaked around it. The tomatoes were dead; dried by the summer heat. On the porch, hung a white wood and metal porch swing. He loved the way it all looked, very worn and loved. Very homey and calm. He loved the inside of the house, since it was what he had been wanting. A simple cozy house with wood floors, a shag carpet maybe, a soft couch, mixed stone walls and a fireplace, bookshelfs with large volumes and happy photo albums, knit pillows, and a summery backyard. He would have taken this house over his home, which was large, and luxurious. He didn't want luxurious, he wanted his simple happy house, with his cozy couch and carpets, his soft bed, his pillows, and his backyard, complete with sunflowers.

"See something dude?"

"Oh, I was just imagining myself living in a house like this. I've always kind of wanted a place like this. So nice and comfy. A place to read, relax, and enjoy my sunflowers."

"Haha, but I bet it can't beat your awesome house back in Russia. That place is freakin' huge yo!"

"Oh, but it does. Even with people living in there, it kind of gets lonely, because it's so big and spacious. And when everyone's running around everywhere, you don't get to spend time with them much. So I'd like a place like this one day. Something simple, where I can have everyone be with me."

Alfred nodded, a bit surprised by Ivan's preferences. He now kind of felt sorry for him, imagining how lonely it must be to live in such a big place, where everyone is avoiding you. He accidentally crinkled the map a little with his right hand.

"I kind of wished I brought a camera so I could take pictures of this place, da?" commented Ivan with a lighthearted chuckle. He actually did wish he brought one with him, but since he didn't, he'd have to picture this place in his mind. He knew he'd never have the chance to live in such a place, but he'd just imagine this place, and hope that if there was an afterlife, that he'd get to live in a place like this, and be happy forever.

"What are you doing comrade? Planning where to kill me and hide the body?" he asked.

"Haha." replied Alfred sarcastically, "I'm just going over the trip route. Wanna see? After all, you're gonna have to be my co-pilot, and point me where to go on this thing. That or you can drive us into a river, whatever."

Ivan peered over, and after scanning, said, "It looks pretty straightforward, since I've read maps like this before. But I'm not so experienced with roads like these. So we might get lost a few times, da?"

"Yeah, but heck, we have five or six days, so we should be fine. I'm afraid we only have that much time, so we'll be sticking around this eastern half of the state, so we'll be able to see Topeka and Wichita, but nothing far West."

"That's fine, da? I'll still get to see my sunflowers."

"Haha, I love how you call them _your_ sunflowers, when their technically mine."

"You mean _mine_, Pa!" called Emma from the kitchen, "And dinner's on!"

As they got up to sit at the table, Ivan said very cooly, "All sunflowers are my sunflowers. They all belong to Mother Russia."

"Dude, that's pretty freaky...and not to mention posessive." answered Alfred, as he pulled out his chair and sat down. Ivan took the seat in the right corner, and looked at the white doily tablecloth on the old oak table. He lifted a corner of it to examine it, and let it fall back down.

"I'd be careful with that if I were you. Em made that when she was just a new state. She's awful proud of it. And this oak table is at least from 1860. It's really old stuff."

"Oh, ah...I like it. Very homey and dainty, da?"

In a few minutes, Kansas brought out plates, and the platters of food. One of them had cobs of corn, and another had some meat dish with sauce on it. Alfred cheered, "Alright, ribs! I love your ribs Em!"

"What would you like to drink Ivan?" asked Emma, getting some glasses out of an old wooden cupboard.

"Do you have vodka?"

"Sorry, no vodka. I've got bourbon if you want that."

"Ah, no thanks. Can I just have water please?"

"Sure. Bourbon for you pa?"

"Yes please Em."

She came back to the table with a glass of water with some ice cubes in it, and handed to Ivan who said, "Spasiba." She raised an eyebrow, and Ivan translated, "That means thank you. Sorry, I'm used to speaking Russian at home."

"Understandable. I now know how to say thanks in five languages, thanks!" She then came back with a bottle of "Wild Turkey" bourbon, and two smaller glasses with ice. Alfred frowned, "Emmalina Jones, I don't care if you do it when I'm not here, but you're not going to drink in front of your father!"

"Oh Pa..." she started, pouting as she sat down next to Ivan. "I mean it young lady." he glared, which earned him a sigh from his daughter, "Only for you Pa." and she went back to the kitchen, and got a can of Diet Rite. Alfred winked at Ivan who was clearly amused by the scene, "You didn't expect me to use discipline, did ya?"

"That's my Pa for you." commented Emma, who rolled her eyes, as she poured her soda into the cup, "He doesn't like to see his kids drinking booze in front of him."

She then leaned over and whispered to Ivan, "But I sometimes sneak some "Wild Turkey" into these cans every so often."

"What's that?" asked Alfred, who already had a mouthful of food.

"Nothing comrade. Your daughter loves you." smiled Ivan who was ready to laugh at America's confused face.

He then himself got a piece of corn, and a rib. He then took his knife and fork, and cut some of the meat off the bones. Kansas and America looked at him, the bispectacled nation commenting, "Russia you're supposed to eat it with your hands."

"I'd rather not, knowing that this sauce is usually really sticky, as I can tell by your hands. It's kind of a pet peeve of mine to get my hands messy with food a lot. I hope I'm not being rude, or destroying some sacred ritual of eating this meat."

"Don't worry about it bud. I like men who are polite. And lucky for you, I'm single." winked Emma jokingly.

Mouth full, America pointed with a dramatic glare, "Hey Russia, don't get any ideas with her!"

"You have my word comrade." swore the violet eyed man, who then took a bite of the barbecued ribs. He was glad his medicine had dulled his stomach pain earlier, so he was able to enjoy his food more for now. Now his legs had been the things bothering him, having become so sore.

"So how are they?" asked Alfred, seeing his guest take the first bite of his meat.

"It's good. A rather peculiar flavor, da? Not really like anything I've had in Russia, except for some pork pirozhki I once had..."

The rest of the dinner went pretty casual, just simple chatting between the three, and the whole time, Ivan felt welcome. At nation dinners, he felt very awkward, as they were often stiff and silent when it came around to him. Especially since nobody had ever voluntarily wanted him as a dinner guest.

When he finished his meat, he took his corn, and following his dinner companions' examples, he ate it with his hands. It wasn't that messy anyway.

* * *

><p>After dinner, they boarded into the car, and said goodbye to Kansas, thanking her for the dinner. Ivan sat in the front passenger seat, the folded map was placed on his lap. Alfred's window was rolled down, as he called, "Em, give your pa a kiss on the cheek goodbye!"<p>

"Oh fine." she agreed, rolling her eyes, kissing his cheek, giving him a pat on the back. He pulled out of the driveway, and waving once more, he and Ivan drove off.

"So we're driving to a city called Emporia it seems, da?"

"Yeah, but there's not much to see there. Bunch of hotels and stuff. By the time we get there, it'll be pretty dark, and we can find a place to snooze for the night. I bet you're tired."

"Oh da, I am. It's approximately 5 AM in Russia now."

"Eugh. That's why I hate traveling far from DC. The jet lag and time differences really bite me in the ass."

"Da, da." Agreed Ivan whole heartedly, and let out a yawn. The sun had just began to set, and it was about early evening, telling by the car's radio clock.

"Just don't fall asleep on me big guy. I need you to get me there."

"I'll try not to comrade." yawned Ivan once again.

"Hey mind if I turn on the radio? Then maybe the music can keep you awake."

"Yes please. But the country station that Kansas was listening to put me to sleep on the ride here."

"I can change it to something else. Any preferences."

"Not really. I hate most of your capitalist music anyway." grinned Ivan.

Alfred fiddled with the dial until he reached a local station playing "Rasputin" by Boney M. He grinned at the Russian, who rolled his eyes, "You may not believe it comrade, but I seriously can't stand that song."

"What, it's about a Russian guy and you don't like it?"

"What, I have _some_ musical taste comrade, and that song honestly gets annoying when you hear it get sung everywhere. I mean, didn't your Beatles ever get annoying?"

"Those guys are from England number one, and number two, they were fucking awesome. Don't diss the Beatles."

"I didn't 'diss' them. I was just asking if you ever found them annoying."

"Hell no." answered the American as he flipped through the radio channels. He settled on a rock channel at a commercial break. When it began playing music again, it began to play a song foreign to Ivan's ears. _Come on! Come on! Come on!_

"Oh hey, this is a real radio gem. Janis Joplin music is rare on radio nowadays." smiled Alfred who then asked, "Which turn do I take?"

"Who is she?... And take the left." asked and answered Ivan at the same time as he studied the map.

"Oh, she was some singer from the 1960's. Very different and popular. Sweet gal she was too. Always had something to say." mused America as he listened to the lyrics, _Take another little piece of my heart now baby..._

"Well, if she was so popular, what happened to her? She didn't lose her fame, da?"

"No, she died in 1970. They think it was drugs or something. Heroin maybe." answered Alfred nonchalantly, as he put on his turn signal. Ivan remembered when he had seen America in the 1970's, there had been a large usage of heroin, and it had affected the nation greatly. His eyes were sunken in, his hair messy, and his skin in awful condition. He had been shaking, and paranoid.

"I remember that year. You weren't doing so great, da?"

"Oh yeah. Not only were you on my ass, but I was shaking like crazy and sore all over. And I felt awful sick too." remembered Alfred, who stuck out his tongue in disgust.

_That's just like what's happening to me...but I know it's going to get worse...,_ thought Ivan, who really wished he could take some medicine now.

"So ah...how old was Ms. Joplin when she died?"

"Twenty-seven." sighed the American, "And that's what's so sad, these people are dying so young because they're messing up so much."

Alfred then smiled, "It's good to know that not much can kill nations like us, eh Ruskie?"

Ivan wanted to cry.

* * *

><p>They got into Emporia about two hours later. They checked into a hotel, where the minute he dropped his suitcase, Ivan crashed onto one of the beds, and sighed. Alfred did the same, but far more exuberantly. He smiled and said, "Hey Ivan, we made it about an hour earlier than I expected, and we didn't get lost! Good job co-pi-"<p>

He stopped when he heard the Russian snore. Rolling his eyes, he got up, and prodded the exhausted silver-blonde. He opened his eyes with an annoyed grunt.

"I wanted to thank you for not getting us lost."

Ivan yawned, and waved his hand a little, "No problem. Can I please sleep?"

"Sure, goodnight buddy.", he smiled, and went to the bathroom, changing into a nightshirt and boxers. When he lay down in bed, he wondered if it was a good idea to call Ivan his buddy, not really knowing if he considered him his friend, or a dunce. He also wondered if he should have told him that he was asleep in his clothes, and if he took off his shoes, he'd be more comfortable. Not considering either idea anymore, he shut his eyes.

* * *

><p>They left bright and early after eating the free continental breakfast at the hotel. America had stacked his plate high with eggs, english muffins, cinnamon-apple muffins, a waffle, frosted flakes, chocolate milk, and coffee. Russia simply had a slice of toast, and tea, since that's what his pained system was telling him to eat that morning. He was relieved that the hotel's TV downstairs was on an ESPN channel, and not a news channel where it could be possible that someone had figured his country's collapse. But then again, his government was keeping it as secret as possible, so it was unlikely.<p>

The car radio played some various music, nothing overly spectacular, while Ivan read the map's directions to Alfred who kept his eyes on the road. And inbetween, they kept busy by talking. Nothing political or about their countries, but simple, nonimportant things, that friends would talk about. Alfred would occassionally point out some different things on the road, and explain them to his passenger, who was so enthralled, his violet eyes would be wide with awe. For such an evil land of capitalist values, at least one state got it right it seemed to him. But there were still no sunflowers.

"We'll see some when we leave Abilene tomorrow. You'll see." assured Alfred. He could tell Ivan was a little impatient, but really he didn't mind at all. He knew Ivan was enjoying the sights of the state, and he had promised that they would see sunflowers. When time was getting low, Alfred and Ivan decided that it would be alright to drive quicker through Newton to get to Abilene by the mid afternoon. So they drove through and saw the town. It was very nice and simplistic, with flat, mesa roof hotels and buildings, and fields. At one point Ivan pointed out some rabbits he saw in the field, grazing. Along the trip through the country so far, he had seen at least 30 pastures of cattle and horses, and 20 spotted with haybales. And he was very impressed with Alfred's ability to point out the meat cows, dairy cows, and other livestock.

"How do you know all that Amerika?" asked Ivan curiously as he picked at a loose thread on his scarf.

"Dude, I'm the nation of meat and fastfood central. I know which cows are burger cows like my left hand." he smirked, raising his hand with a wiggle.

"Comrade, that's your right hand."

"I know, but I was using the turn signal." said Alfred who was trying to find an excuse.

"We're on a straight one way road, so why would y-"

"Oooh look a WHEAT field!" exclaimed the other nation quickly. The Russian laughed, realizing how silly the American could be sometimes. This was the kind of friend he had always wanted. One that wasn't afraid of him. One that wasn't always assuming his bad side in everything. One who could laugh at him, and he could laugh at too, without any worries. One he could actually talk to, and smile to. Perhaps not a romance, but a platonic friend, a brother maybe.

He hoped that America wanted to be his friend too.

* * *

><p>Soon enough, they got to Abilene, and as Alfred drove slowly through the streets, Ivan looked at the buildings, which were made of brick or very aged wood. It was a very aged town, but it looked like a happy one.<p>

"This is one of my favorite places around here, especially since my old boss Ike liked this place and lived here. He's buried here, if I remember right."

"Oh, that would explain the sign out in front of the visitor center we drove by."

"If you want, I can show you it later."

"Maybe...I saw a pink tower sticking out of the trees when we drove on that street over there." pointed Ivan. "What was that?"

Alfred drove back to see what he was talking about, "Oh, that's the Kirby House! Real nice place. It was a house built by some rich guy named in the 1800's or something, and they turned it into a restaurant. It's really nice on the outside and inside. If you want, we can have dinner there, and you can look at it all inside."

"Da. We can go now if you want." nodded Ivan. He honestly wasn't too hungry, but he could order something small or whatnot. He may as well see the place.

"Great, I'm starving!" exclaimed Alfred happily, as he swerved the corner, and after some navigating, parked in front of the Kirby House. And Ivan knew his driver was right. The house was very beautiful on the outside structurewise, with it's steeple like roof, and large front porch. The pink color left something to be desired, but it didn't really detract too much. It was a very old house he could tell, almost a southern victoria era.

When they got inside, Ivan saw the inside of the house had been renewed, but it was still very dated looking, with its older styled wallpaper, lighting, and large doorways. When they were seated, and decided on their orders, Alfred ordered a burger (big surprise) and Ivan was actually able to get borscht, which was the soup of the day. He had later commented to Alfred that it was a very unique taste compared to the borscht he usually had, which pleased the American to no end. But he seemed quiet, and with a lot on his mind during dinner.

Alfred then tapped on his shoulder to get his attention as they got the check, "There's a viewing window in the tower upstairs, wanna see?"

"Oh, ah da?"

So they paid for their meal, and went up the stairs, where they found a smaller flight of stairs, which was much steeper. Alfred commented, "_Riiiicolaaaa._" as he climbed them, which earned an eyeroll from the Russian.

As they looked out the window, they realized they couldn't see much but the parking lot. "Some view." shrugged America, "They usually have this place for couples only anyway."

"Ah." nodded Ivan.

"'Ey Amerika?"

"Hm?"

"Would you be my friend?"

* * *

><p><strong>Will America accept Russia's offer for friendship, or decline? <strong>

**The places used in this chapter are actual places in Kansas. The Kirby House is a wonderful little restaurant in Abilene. And Kansas' house is inspired by my great aunt and uncle's house in Lawrence City. It's a really nice place.**

**The song used is 'Piece of My Heart' by Janis Joplin. I think America would have felt sad about singers and such dying so young.**

**Read and review or Alfred gets hit by a herd of cows when he tries to make burgers.**


	11. The Sunflower State Part III

**Do you guys honestly think Alfred is a big enough moron to say no, or that I was an even bigger one to make him say no? Well, to show how sappy I am, I didn't make him say no. Just read.**

* * *

><p>"Would you be my friend?"<p>

America tilted his head, "What?"

"Would you be my friend? I want you to be my friend." answered Russia quietly. The American looked down at the floor, opened his mouth as if to say something, then closed it. His mouth then turned oddly at the corners, as if he was trying to think of something to say. Russia didn't notice he was smiling, thinking, _Silly Ivan. So formal._

"I understand if you don't, since I've treated you so badly in the past, and if you don't I-"

"Shut up a minute Ivan."

The Russian sighed and looked at the floor, feeling his heart sink. That wasn't what he wanted to hear. At all. He had wanted the American to say yes. And he was rejected...it made him feel awful.

"Oh, I-I understand." he said trying not to cry.

He looked back up when he felt Alfred hug him tightly with a goofy grin, "I meant, Shut up Ivan, you didn't have to ASK to be my friend. We're already friends, if it wasn't clear enough to you!"

"In the past you said you hated my guts, da?" asked Ivan, smiling back, trying not to laugh with joy.

"Dude, that's because you were threatening to fire missiles at my ass, for starters. Then there's the fact that I _always_ hate my current enemy's guts, even if we're friends any time else. And you aren't my enemy trying to kill me now, and we're buddies now! So why not be your friend?"

Ivan tried not to start bawling out of happiness. Because he was really happy right now. He had always wanted a friend like America more than anything, and now he realized he had one this whole time. He returned Alfred's hug with a giant bearhug of his own, and swung from side to side, lifting him up. He let go when the smaller one whimpered, "Vital organs are telling me they wanna be let go."

"Oh, sorry." laughed the Russian as he let his friend go. He hadn't felt this spontaneously happy in a while, and his way of expressing it was often physically strong. Alfred looked out the window, and saw a guy in a traffic cop uniform slap a piece of paper on his windshield.

"Dammit, I parked in the handicap lane." muttered the blonde, "I'm just glad I have the money for it."

"Um, Amerika...he's putting another on the car."

He looked out the window again, "SHIT! I left the lights on!"

Ivan nearly died laughing.

* * *

><p>The next morning before they left Abilene, Alfred then said, "I wanna drive past this one flower field I've always liked, and get a picture with my phone." When Ivan's eyes lit up, he said, "It's not sunflowers though, it's some wildflowers. But they're still really pretty." he smiled. He was a little worried about Ivan now, because this morning, he looked awful. He had been very pale that morning, and seemed to be in a bit of pain. That and his hair was now always so dull and shineless. And Alfred hadn't thought much of it at the beginning of the trip, but Ivan had been <em>limping<em> most of the time. He seemed better now, but...

They drove past the sign welcoming them to Abilene, and Alfred turned a corner. He began to drive very slowly, as he pointed to his right. Ivan looked, and saw a large field of very thin wispy grass, that grew long and bunched like hair. And decorating the grass hair were hundreds of purple and pink flowers, like foxgloves, or such swaying in the gentle breeze. Alfred was right, thought Ivan. This was a beautiful field, and it looked so peaceful. As if it were a place to be enjoyed as a field for naps or picnicking.

Ivan was knocked out of his small daze by Alfred prodding him with his phone. "Take a picture for me, since I need to focus on the road. Make it quick!"

Ivan aimed the phone, and snapped the picture. It was surprisingly good, for a picture taken on a phone. It wasn't blurred by the car moving, and he got a good amount of flowers showing in the shot.

"Wow, you've got mad photography skills Ruskie. I'm not kidding there."

"Are you kidding? The last time I took a picture of someone, it was of Ukraine, and the camera was so focused in, it's main focus was her chest."

Alfred immediately burst into uncontrollable laughter. Because he knew it wasn't TOTALLY because Ivan couldn't zoom the camera.

"Oh, are you laughing because the camera wasn't focusing right?"

"Y-yeah. You could say that." giggled the bispectacled man as he wiped away a tear.

They had driven for about an hour, when Alfred finally said, "I wanna go through this one town I like, then we can go to the sunflowers. Is that okay?"

"Da, you're the driver after all. The only way I could control this trip is if I gave you bad directions. Or I pushed you out of the car."

Alfred scooched away from Ivan in his seat. Even if he was now his friend, that didn't mean he didn't scare the you-know-what out of him every so often. He eventually drove into Cottonwood Falls, and older town, with a large courthouse. He pointed to Ivan, "That's the Chase County courthouse. It's really old, and it's got an old jail cell in there. Kansas took me there once, and locked me in it until I let her drive the car that day."

"Good for her." smiled Ivan deviously.

"Don't get any ideas." teased his friend. "Anyway, it looks like we can't go in it now. Wanna go check out the shops?"

"Okay." nodded Ivan. He was a little impatient about seeing the sunflowers, but he reminded himself that he may never get to see this place again, so he may as well enjoy it all, as much as he could. So Alfred parked the car (correctly this time) and they walked down the streets. The first stop was a historical society's museum about the area. The main reason they went in was because it had air conditioning, both nations were already hot by the time they got outside. Alfred was reading articles about some guy Ivan had never heard of, Knute Rockne. Well, whoever he was, Alfred sure enjoyed reading about him. He was there for twenty minutes, while Ivan relaxed on a bench.

He then asked Alfred who sat down with him, "Who was Knute Rockne? Comrade of yours?"

"No, but I knew him. Awesome football coach. American football I mean. Coached the guys at Notre Dame. Ever heard of it?"

"No, I don't know much about your colleges here or whatnot."

"Oh, well anyway, he was some big inspirational figure. A really great guy too. He died in some plane crash in the 1930s, near here, really sad. Just kind of interesting for me to read about every so often I guess."

"I'm amazed people remember a sports coach after all these years."

"Well of course. He left a pretty big impact."

_I wonder if people will remember me like that when I'm gone...,_ thought Ivan.

"Well, are you ready to go? There's a little shop we could check out."

"Sure." shrugged Ivan. Sunflowers couldn't wait, but they could be patient more, he guessed. They went across the street, and into a shop. Big relief to Alfred, who enjoyed its amazing airconditioner.

Ivan browsed through the merchandise, and his eyes gazed on a little pin. It was a little sunflower, the center being a big brown button, and little fabric petals were glued around it. A metal leaf was on the lower right, at an angle. It was so small, it was rather unnoticeable to the regular shopper, but to Ivan, it was...cute. He really liked it. And he was a smart shopper, so he didn't buy much extra expenses, but this pin was special. He hadn't bought anything else on the trip, minus food, but this would be his special souvenir of his dream land.

He walked past the homemade clothespin dolls of grannies with wire glasses, and cheerios put in a little bag labeled 'doughnut seeds', and up to the cash register. He had exchanged his currency at the airport, so it was easier to count his money. It didn't cost much, but to Ivan, the pin was priceless. Once he got his reciept, he took the sunflower out of the bag, and pinned it on his shirt.

* * *

><p>"Sir, you must be hot with that scarf on!" commented the lady at the register.<p>

"Not really, I actually kind of like this weather. I'm more used to the cold, and I like the warm sun."

"Oh, where are you from?"

"Russia. It's kind of cold there now." he smiled.

"Well, welcome to Kansas, and enjoy the weather!" she smiled. Ivan smiled back and pulling Alfred out from his air bath, they went back to the car. Alfred looked on Ivan's shirt, and said, "Huh, cute pin."

"Da, isn't it?" smiled the tall man happily. He examined it with his finger happily, and looked out the window as they drove off.

"Okay Ivan, now we can drive to a sunflower field. I know there are a bunch around this part of the state. So we'll just kind of drive a little aimlessly until we find one, 'kay?"

Ivan only had a huge smile in response. He looked very intently out the window, looking for the bright yellow petals. Alfred laughed to himself, as Ivan stared out the window, as if the road and land around them was a sea, and the sunflowers were the land they were searching for. This went on for about ten whole minutes, silence, while they searched, until finally, Ivan pointed and cried like a happy child, "Found them!"

Alfred looked over the hill, and soon enough, what he saw was a big long stretch of the tall yellow flowers. Alfred drove down the road, and parked on the gravel road nearby. They both got out of the car, Ivan running ahead, his scarf trailing behind him, and he smiled as he stood face to face with the sunflowers. Alfred walked behind him when he stopped, smiling he introduced, "Here you have it, Kansas sunflowers."

Eyes as big as saucers, Ivan had a cantaloupe smile as he ran into the field, laughing and sighing in awe at the flowers, exclaiming every so often an amazement, such as, "These are beautiful! Da! Da, so beautiful..." as he stroked the flowers and smelled them. Alfred dug a camera out of his pocket, and snapped a bunch of pictures, some of Ivan who was laughing like a kid on Christmas morning, some of the sunflowers which were as beautiful as could be, and both, Ivan enveloped in his dream. Ivan would walk farther into the field every so often, and pick a sunflower to take home. He was absolutely euphoric, having found everything here as he imagined.

Soon enough, he sat down in the field and lay down, not caring that he was getting dry dirt in his hair, and closed his eyes in absolute bliss. He was so sure at this moment that he had died. That he had collapsed and died, and that this was his heaven. But he realized he was still alive when he opened his eyes and saw Alfred standing over him, smirking.

"So?"

"So what?"

"So which are better, these sunflowers, or yours?"

Ivan bit the inside of his cheek with an embarrassed smile, "I'd have to say, these, since they get to bask in the sun even more and for being in such a warm place. These really are beautiful comrade."

"Thanks bro." smiled Alfred who sat down next to Ivan. Both lay on their backs, looking up at the sky, and the sunflowers towering over them.

"This is the type of place I would live in forever if I could comrade. It's almost perfect, da?"

"Except for when the big-ass monsoons come around here, and during the winter when the sunflowers are dead."

"Even then. I'd imagine the sunflowers were still here." Ivan smiled, with a content sigh. It was silent for a while, neither person saying anything as they lay in the sun. Alfred hesitated before he opened his mouth, still unsure, and asked,

"Yo, Ivan, can I ask you a question?"

"Da?" asked Ivan, who sat up, seeing Alfred's conflicted face.

"Are you alright? I mean, seriously, are you alright? This morning you looked like you were gonna be sick, and you look kind of pale. And your hair doesn't look as though it's as healthy as usual."

Ivan cursed himself for looking so unhealthy now in the advancing stages of his collapse. Russia's economy and government were really beginning to spiral downward, and he couldn't really do much about it. Seeing the worry in his friend's face, Ivan smiled, and said, "I'm fine Amerika. I'm just not used to the sun."

The worry in Alfred's face disappeared as he gave a goofy grin, "Oh, it's like an adverse reaction to the sun right? I see!"

Ivan nodded, deciding to say that, "Da! That's just it!"

He felt bad lying to his new friend, but he didn't want to worry him more, or dishearten the boy by telling him he was dying. It would have ruined everything he had enjoyed with Alfred on this trip.

He then looked back to the sunflowers around him and smiled as he stood up. He was tall enough to see over them, and he looked around the field, trying to find roughly the center of the field. He walked through the flowers, and finding that he was about in the center, he smiled even more, but this time a bit more sadly. Because he knew that he wanted this place to be remembered for him. Eyes wet, he looked down at his scarf.

* * *

><p>Alfred didn't realize Ivan had gotten up and left until he opened his eyes. He got up, and saw the sunflowers rustling near him, until he could see Ivan walking back to him.<p>

"Where were you?"

"Oh, I was just looking at the other sunflowers. They're nice, da?"

"Yup. I really like this place too. I took some pictures, that I can send to you when they get developed."

"Oh good!" smiled Ivan, who then said, "You won't forget this place, da?"

"Probably not. Why?"

"Just promise me you won't forget it, da?"

"Sure, sure, I promise." said Alfred casually. Little did he know that this was a big promise to Ivan. They soon saw the sun was setting, and went back to the car. When they had driven for a while, Alfred then noticed that Ivan's scarf was not on his neck.

"Hey Ivan, where's your scarf?"

"I put it in my suitcase. I was getting hot." lied the Russian.

"Oh." nodded Alfred, who had been unobservant. Ivan looked back over his shoulder to see if he could still see the field. It was gone.

* * *

><p><strong>A FEW DAYS LATER<strong>

"Thank you Amerika for the wonderful trip. I'll never forget it." thanked Russia as he walked near the security gate.

"Hey no problem dude. Was it everything you were dreaming of?"

"Even better."

"Wow, then you must really have liked it here. You should come back here sometime."

"I hope so comrade. Now I guess I'd better go, da? Do svidani-"

He was interrupted by a huge, impromptu hug from the American, who muttered, "See ya buddy, have a safe flight."

He hugged his friend back, not wanting to let go. The next time he'd see him, it would be in a month, during the next world meeting. And he knew that it would be hard to see everyone, since he'd no doubt be very sick by then. And he knew that the minute he told everyone he was going to die, he'd have to start giving his goodbyes.

The two friends eventually ended the hug, and Ivan walked through the gate, waving to Alfred one last time before he disappeared into the crowd.

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><p>When he got home, he put the sunflower pin onto his everyday coat, to keep it there, and went back to work. Except he couldn't get his mind off of the dream of a trip he had, and the friend he had found on it.<p>

While he was destroying a document that was asking him to soon reveal the poor condition of his country, Toris came in with some tea, and asked Ivan, "What happened to your scarf?"

Ivan sighed, almost dreamily, "I lost it in Kansas."

Thinking the Russian man's sigh was a sigh of sadness, Lithuania said, "Oh I'm so sorry."

The violet eyed man smiled sweetly, "Don't be."

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><p><strong>I kind of went quickly on this chapter, because I'm anxious about writing the next one. The next one involves Russia's final goal, which is no doubt the hardest. It also involves a person that Russia finds difficult to call his friend. And the feeling is mutual. I think some of you can probably guess who, and if not, <em>kesesesese!<em> Too bad you'll have to read it! **

**And Russia's scarf is no more. Memorial montage anyone?**

**The Knute Rockne stuff and Cottonwood Falls is true, and actually exists. :D**

**Read and Review or the pin gets lost, and when Latvia goes on his hands and knees to find it, he falls and gets impaled by it through his nose, and DIES. Because every smart person knows that Latvia doesn't have a nose. That or Northern Ireland falls on it, but doesn't die, because he's a ginger, and as we all know, gingers have no soul.**


	12. The Unawesome Confrontation

**Russia's final mission! Who is it?**

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><p>Ivan swallowed hard as he approached the foreign door. His stomach was in painful knots. Not just because he was sick, but because he was genuinely nervous. He was nervous that this meeting would end on a very horrible note. He now regretted the fact that he had saved this for last, but his nervousness had gotten the best of him. Because he knew that asking for a friendship out of this meeting would definitely be out of the question. But that didn't mean he wasn't going to try. He'd simply show how sorry he was. Or try, because damn it, it was simply too easy to aggravate them.<p>

The person he was going to visit didn't know he was coming today, and if he had told them, there was no doubt they'd have filed a restraining order against him, and told him to burn in hell. Which is why he would visit by surprise.

In the past, he had considered apologizing to them, or making it up to them, but he hadn't, judging by the very hostile circumstances. He knew that the chances of everything getting better were next to zero, but the fact that he tried might cheer him up. He was getting too sick to make all ends meet. And he felt even worse that he hadn't been able to do anything for his precious Toris yet.

He still wanted to think of something for Toris, but he was still at a standstill, and knowing that the best time to deal with his worst goal was now, he may as well.

He hesitated in knocking the door, and decided to take a moment to wait, and think of what to say first, perhaps 'Hello, I'm here to say I'm sorry.' or maybe, 'I want to be your friend.', but realizing that this was not a 'normal' nation, he decided, nervously to wing it. If he failed, sucks for them, he would just move on.

He then knocked on the door, which was black, with a crystal window. He thought he could see a fractured light through the waved crystal, which could be a window on a wall across the way. He drew a breath in, and tried to rid himself of nerves. He was still nervous, but tried not to show it, trying to appear as his normal, superior self, but the fact that he was sick, and that it had affected his normal appearance still made him look less than normal.

Ivan could then see a form blocking the windowed light from the inside of the house, and get closer to the door. Eventually it opened, revealing a strongly built man with slicked back blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. The man blinked and asked confusedly, "Ah, Russia? How may I um, help you?"

"Hello Germany." greeted Russia as polite as he could. "I was wondering if I could see your brother."

The German man's blue eyes widened, and he said very clearly and seriously, "I don't think I should allow you to see him. Especially since the last time you said that, you took him away." he glared.

Russia nodded, "Yes, I remember what happened. But I just want to talk to him. I won't harm him, I swear. You can even watch in on the conversation, da?"

"Why did you come here anyway? Because I'm not going to stand here and watch my bruder get humiliated again by you." he glared once again, not being so fond of the Russian when it came to his brother.

"I just wanted to talk to him, and say I was sorry. I even have something for him to keep." answered Russia holding an envelope in the air, trying to look as pathetic as possible for a split second.

"What's in the envelope? A summons?"

"No. It's something I'm hoping he'll accept. In any case of what happens, he won't be harmed or taken away. I swear it."

Germany, taking notice of Russia's poor physical appearance, gave a breath through his nose, and sighing, said, "I'll get him."

He then walked into a room in his house, and called out, "Bruder! You have a visitor!"

Russia could hear someone exclaim, "Gott West, is it the sweepstakes I signed up for? Did I win?"

Russia then saw the one he was looking for. And the one he was looking for saw the one he never wanted to see again. Violets met scarlets when Russia found himself face to face with Prussia.

* * *

><p>Prussia's eyes shot up with disbelief, when he saw the Russian standing in front of him, smiling that stupid kiddy smile he always had. His face contorted with disgust as he stared at him, and he hissed under his breath spitefully, <em>Go to fucking hell why don't you?<em> and he slammed the door. Or so he thought, as when he closed it, he saw the large gloved hand of the Russian sticking out of the door. Prussia swore under his breath, and shouted, "Go away ya damn Russian!"

Russia simply smiled that childish smile of his when Prussia opened the door to shove his hand back, and he said, "It's not nice to shut the door on visitors Prussia. I thought I taught you better manners, da?"

"What gave you the GALL to come to my house to harass me you bastard?" he asked, petting his bird that was perched on his shoulder.

"Nothing. I just wanted to talk." smiled Russia, who was secretly very nervous about talking to the albino in front of him. He didn't necessarily FEAR anything, but he just wasn't sure what would happen.

"What gave you the idea that I'd ever want to talk to you? Burn in hell freak!" glared the Prussian, who then slammed the door in the Russian's face. This time, the Russian didn't use his hand to block the door. He then locked it, and went into the kitchen behind him, to grab a glass of water. Russia didn't even bother trying to break down the door. Germany was casually reading a newspaper.

"Haha, West I showed that creep a thing or two."

"Ja, whatever you say bruder. So where's your chick?"

"Hm?"

"Gilbird? Your bird, wasn't he on your shoulder?"

Horrified, Gilbert realized his beloved pet was missing from his shoulder. He must have locked him out there with the Russian, how horrible! By now, the evil man could have killed the little guy, or eaten him alive! Gilbert screamed, and ripped the door open, nearly tearing it off the hinges. He looked and saw Ivan sitting on the ground, up against the house, holding the bird up close to his face, making little "Peep!" sounds to the bird that was a little fluffy yellow ball in his hands. Ivan smiled happily, peeping as if he was talking to the bird. Gilbert ran over, and roared, "GIVE ME BACK MY BIRD!"

"I never took him." claimed Ivan, who held him out for Gilbird to take, and got up, "Before you slammed the door in my face, he flew off your shoulder, and when you closed the door, he flew onto mine. He's very cute, da?"

"Alright you damn Commie. What do you want from me, money, blood, land? Well guess what, you're not getting any of my stuff or West's!"

"Who said I wanted anything from you? I just wanted to talk to you." frowned Ivan.

"Well, what? What could you POSSIBLY want to talk about with me?" growled the angry albino. The Russian looked down at the ground, and swaying slightly, tilting his boots inward towards each other, he drew in a breath, and slowly and deliberately said, with a soft, serious voice, "I'm sorry."

"What? What are you-"

"I'm sorry for having treated you so awfully after the war. The chains, the whips, locking you up. Everything."

Gilbert's face stretched in confusion, then realization, then absolute frustration. Gilbird was smart enough to fly off his shoulder a split second before the albino jumped into a rage, and tackled the Russian to the ground.

"Y-YOU DIRTY FUCKING FREAK!" he yelled in Ivan's face, "YOU LET MY DAMN COUNTRY GET RIPPED OFF THE MAP, YOU BEAT ME UP, MADE ME YOUR PRISONER, AND NEARLY KILLED ME, UNTIL MY BRUDER CAME TO GET ME, THEN YOU COME ALL THE WAY HERE OVER A HALF OF A CENTURY LATER TO TAUNT ME?"

Ivan's face was blank, and he said absolutely nothing as Gilbert continued, with a firm, pressing grip on his chest, "AND ALL YOU CAN FUCKING SAY IS SORRY?"

Ivan couldn't even say anything when Gilbert finally growled, "What, you had some money trouble or something, and now you wanna mooch off of me? After all you've done to me, I don't think you even care about what you di-"

"I never wanted to hurt you!" interrupted Ivan, who tried to get free from under the Prussian. "I was told to do it by my boss. He made me do it! I didn't have a choice!"

"Likely story bastard." spat Gilbert, who held the Russian down harder, "You seemed to enjoy it a whole lot when you were beating me and torturing m-"

"I-I can't explain that. I don't know why...something's just wrong with me. I know you won't ever believe it, so the best I can do is say I'm sorry." whimpered Ivan, who was getting incredibly pale. Gilbert got off of him, and glared at him. The blonde shook as he got up, and looked as though he was about ready to pass out.

"You're really pathetic Russia, to come all the way here. There really is something wrong with you." hissed Prussia, who then paused and saw the tall man shuddering and give a ghastly cough. His body violently shook with the power of the cough, and when he finally stopped, he was breathing heavily, gasping for air.

He looked at Gilbert, a bit of blood running down his lip, and with a weak sad smile "Da, you're right...there is."

* * *

><p>Prussia stared at the blood running through Russia's fingers, as he choked out in both surprise and horror, "Y-you just coughed up blood."<p>

"Da. It seems like it."

"Damnit, you're sick! I mean look at you, you're as white as a sheet, and you look awful."

"D-da, well I just don't fee-"

"I know why you came here! So that you could fake that you were sorry, and get me to hug you, so I'd get sick with whatever epidemic is going on in your little winter wonderland, and then get West sick! Sly of you, but it won't work basta-"

"Would you shut up for a minute?" glared Ivan annoyed, "I don't feel well, but I seriously came here to say I was sorry! I've been too afraid in the past to say it then, but I decided now is the best time, or I'll never have anoth-"

"What?"

"Another chance. That's what."

Gilbert's red eyes widened a little, "...What's happened to your country?"

Realizing he couldn't leave the truth restrained from his lips anymore, Ivan looked at the ground, and asked, "Promise you won't tell anybody..."

"I'm not promising anything, unless you tell me now!" grumbled Gilbert, curious as to what misfortunes had been put upon the nation he hated. If England had cursed him, or he was in bad luck, then he could laugh at him, telling him it served him right.

"My country is falling apart. I don't have much longer. Within the rest of this year, I'll be off the map."

"So, that's why you're sick? Hah, no problem jerk. Just move in with your sisters, if you're lucky enough to persuade them."

"No, no. You don't seem to understand. My country is not merging with another. The government is collapsing. And so am I."

Gilbert paused, then asked, "So wait...you're _dying_?"

He froze when he saw tears running down the Russian's face, and Ivan nodded, "Mhm...I'll be gone in a little under three months."

The Prussian felt a rock sink into his stomach as he heard the faintly audible sobs from the other nation. He had really hated the jerk, but he didn't really expect him to be dying. And then there was the fact that in the past, Ivan did treat him awfully, but he could remember the rare moments where the guy just cracked, and broke down, needing comfort. And once, Gilbert had been beaten so badly, that he was near unconscious when he felt the large cold nation cradling him, chanting that he had no choice, and he didn't want to hurt him. But of course, he didn't believe him. And Ivan had never intended to attempt to kill him, or have a thought to do so, so why wish for death on him?

"This was probably my last chance to actually get it over with before I'm too weak to travel. So I may as well have gotten it done now, da?" mumbled Ivan, as he wiped his eyes.

Gilbert's mouth was moving like a fish's, trying to think of a response. If he had been less sympathetic at this very moment, he would have been probably dancing in place, singing about how everyone would be mowing down all the sunflowers once "Boris the Bear was doing the Cossack dance in Hell", but now, he just couldn't. Ivan looked so sick, that it almost made him pity the bastard.

"Prussia. Please don't tell the other nations. I'll do it myself. When the time is right." begged Russia, who was unsteady on his feet.

Gilbert finally spoke, "You idiot, why didn't you say anything to the other guys about this earlier? They could have helped your count-"

"No, they wouldn't have. My country is in a very quickly advancing collapse. They wouldn't have been able to help..."

"Oh..."

"Da. It sucks. You must be happy, da? I'm going to be gone forever, before you know it, and you'll never see me again."

"No. Not really. How can I be happy seeing an asshole like you standing in front of me, making me want to tear your head off, and knowing that I hate your guts? And what puts the icing on the cake is that you're gonna die. I may hate you, but even the awesome me doesn't like seeing people die, or hearing of it either. I may be too cool to care about someone like you, but I'm not a heartless jerk."

"Well I'm not either. And I hate death even more than you. Believe it or not, I can barely sleep at night with those thoughts in my head."

It was silent, as Prussia had a half-hearted glare towards Russia, who was staring back, with a weak and blank glance. Prussia wasn't so sure what to do anymore. He was both angry and pitying towards the man in front of him.

"Prussia, what have you thought of me after all these years? Please...tell me." said Ivan, who wanted to get back to his mission.

"So, you really want to know?" asked Gilbert, whose blood was beginning to boil again at the idea of giving the Russian a what for, letting the pity die.

"Da. Ignore the fact I'm sick, and gimme all you got. I won't attack you or anything. I don't think I could anyway, since I'd topple over instantaneously."

"I'm not so sure, since you'd beat my brains in with that pipe of yours!" exclaimed the albino, who jumped back a little.

"I left it at home." said Ivan disappointedly, smiling at the idea of beating the Prussian's head in for a twisted split second.

That was what let the Prussian go wild with his words, yelling enragedly, starting with, "Well for the past sixty years, I've though of you as a..." and began to insert a smorgasboard of curses and swears directed at the Russian in front of him, calling him a 'fat worm shitter', a 'dog kisser', and a 'bag of chicken crap soaked in piss'. Those were the weaker ones, out of all the curses that he had launched toward the violet eyed man in about twenty or thirty minutes. Ivan couldn't really count how long. Gilbert just let the swears and obscenities roll off his tongue like his second language, and he didn't ever pause. It felt good to finally lash out at the jerk like this, and tell him a thing or two. Ivan's mouth was agape the whole time, absolutely AMAZED by the albino's uniquely colorful language.

After some time, however, he had broken down laughing. He wasn't sure if it was when he was called a 'shit-on-Jesus motherfucker', or a 'booger-bitching-monkey cock'. And this wasn't his normal scary laughter, this was hysterical, relieved laughter. Prussia was about ready to call him a 'shit-eating turd' when he realized that the Russian was laughing. He scowled, "Hey! I'm venting out my awesome anger on you, and you're laughing! Stop it!"

Ivan said in between giggles, "S-so which one am I, the 'booger-bitching monkey cock', or the 'shit-on-Jesus motherfucker'?"

"You're all of those plus much more." growled the Prussian.

"Oh, thanks for telling me. I now can add some more words to my dictionary, da? Feel better?"

"...surprisingly...yeah. But I still hate you."

"I can live with that, da? For the next few months at least. Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

"Would you like it if I gave you Kaliningrad back?"

* * *

><p>Gilbert paused a minute as he tried to process the question. "Wait, what?"<p>

"I took Kaliningrad from you, da?"

"Yeah and pretty much everything else." growled Gilbert, who pet the bird on his shoulder once again.

"Well...when I'm...gone, Kaliningrad will need some nation to be linked to. Since you and your brother are merged, I was thinking maybe you could take it back."

"Take it back? Russland, this may be a little late of news, but I'm not a country anymore. And Kaliningrad is a seaport. What would the awesome me want to do with a seaport?"

"Well, maybe your brother can take it, da?"

"Meh, he doesn't really care about what happens to that place."

"But don't you want it back?"

"I guess, but since Prussia's no longer on the map, what is there to do?"

"Even if your brother doesn't care what happens to the seaport, he can take it. I'll write something in my will about it going to you and him. Prussia, and West Germany. Even if you're no longer a nation, you can call it yours." he smiled.

"Oh. Well. Uh. Thanks." thanked Gilbert reluctantly.

"I also have something else for you." continued Ivan, who pulled an envelope out from his coat pocket. He took a check out of the envelope, and pulling a pen out from the pocket, scribbled something on it. He handed the check to Gilbert, whose red eyes scanned the check, then went as wide as saucers.

"H-how much is this worth?"

"Enough for you to retire at least ten times if you were a mortal being. From my personal savings."

"D-damn, how much do you even HAVE, you ass?"

"Well, let's just say with all the personal money I've saved since I was young, enough so that the money I just gave you will only take a little chunk out of all I have."

He then paused, "If you want to accept it that is."

Gilbert's hands shook as he re-read the amount over and over. With the money Ivan just gave him, he was a millionaire.

He looked up and said, "Damn you, if I didn't hate you so much, I'd hug you. But then again, that wouldn't be awesome."

"Suit yourself." sighed Ivan, "I'll be splitting up the rest of my money in my will, so there's your little piece of it."

"Oh. Danke then."

"I'll assume that means thank you. Now I'm going to go home if you don't mind. The next meeting is in three weeks. If I see you there, then I'll look forward to it. If not, do svidaniya, enjoy life comrade."

"Go home then." shrugged the albino characteristically, "I didn't want to see you anyway. Take care of yourself Russland, and mein gott, if I see you at the meeting, you'll know doubt look awful."

"If I end up having to let the news come out at the meeting, please act shocked alright?"

"Is that your one and only dying wish for me?"

"Da."

"Sure then. Adieu asshole." smiled Gilbert with a grin.

"Screw you comrade." Ivan smiled back.

"Aww how nice, we're becoming friends." sneered Gilbert sarcastically as he closed the door. He sighed, realizing that he truly pitied Ivan now for having to be in this kind of predicament.

Ludwig had been rather worried when his usually exuberant brother was incredibly quiet that night.

"Bruder is everything alright? Russia didn't summon you to his country did he?"

"Nein. He just gave me a check and said he was sorry."

"So why are you so worried looking?"

"I don't know..." said Gilbert.

He wasn't lying.

* * *

><p><strong>Yep. He was able to make things better with Prussia, but they still hate each other. And Prussia now knows that Russia's very sick.<strong>

**Next chapter...?**

**Read and Review or I'm having Gilbird get eaten by Russia.**


	13. Pravda

**Russia find his dead end.**

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><p><strong>THREE WEEKS LATER<strong>

Russia's health was beginning to really spiral downward. It had gotten progressively worse after he had visited Prussia, about a few days later. He had taken a shot of vodka, because he had wanted some, and thirty minutes later experienced horrible pain, nearly on the floor, groaning in his pain. He had realized that his body could no longer ingest alcohol, and he felt awful, as he could never drink his beloved vodka. But then again, he didn't want to hurt anymore, so he'd have to make his sacrifices. He could always drink it in the afterlife.

He was pretty sure his cat, Sunflower knew something was wrong, since he followed Ivan everywhere. And he'd sleep right up near his chest at night. And the cat would usually never do that unless he was sick. It was as if he had some sixth sense or something. That or he was able to sense when Ivan had a fever or chills, and sit near him until his temperature was regular.

Ivan had also been incredibly tired. He was physically weak, and very unfocused. He couldn't stay standing long, without feeling dizzy, or sick. What made it even worse was that he looked absolutely awful, his hair dead and sick looking, and he was incredibly pale. He had also lost a lot of weight, and his appearance was very gaunt.

The Baltics and his sisters had noticed most of this, and when they worriedly asked him if he was alright, he assured them that he was just getting over a flu, and he'd be alright. But he realized it wouldn't save him for very long, since they hadn't yet caught him throwing up blood, or passing out. But the moment they did, he'd have no choice but to tell the truth. And it would be painful for all of them. However, he didn't realize that they were also growing incredibly nervous to the point of watching his every move. And when he caught someone doing so, he'd glare at them, and they'd scurry off. To avoid having them see him, he'd give the excuse that he had a lot of work, and would lock himself in his study. The truth is that his workload was normal, but he'd stay in there all day. If someone knocked, telling him that they had made supper, he'd tell them to leave it by the door, and once he thought the coast was clear, he'd take the food, and either throw it out the window into the compost bin, or he'd feed it to Sunflower, who purred at the fact of getting treats. Half the time in the study, he'd simply sit in the chair, not wanting to get up, his body so sore and weak.

One day, it had gotten worse so badly, that he was sure the end was near. However he recieved a letter from his boss, explaining that the market had crashed, but was going up and down horribly, and the government was considering leaving within a month. So he wasn't going to die just yet. But it was still imminent. Which scared him even more.

* * *

><p>The next evening, he was going up the stairs to his bedroom, when he felt his legs almost give way under him. He gripped the wooden stair rail, and it gave a crack. He nearly fell face first. But he was able to catch himself. Toris had been following him at a distance, and saw him nearly collapse. He went over asking, "Master Russia! Are you alright?"<p>

Ivan turned his head, "Da!" he grumbled, shakily getting back up, trying to go back up the stairs.

"Y-you look so pale! Are you sure you're alright?"

"I'm fine Toris." he said blankly, trying to leave. Toris started, "B-but you've been sick for three weeks, and you seem to be getting wo-"

"I'M FINE TORIS." growled Ivan angrily as he charged up the stairs and slammed the door. He didn't bother taking off his sweater and putting on a nightshirt. He just lay prostrate on the bed, and stared around the dark, waiting for Lithuania to come into his room, telling him it was alright, and that he'd get better soon. But the door didn't open, as Toris just sadly went back downstairs. Ivan felt a chill all too familiar enter his room, and he could almost feel the icy snowflakes. He heard the cold uncaring voice mumbling, _Good, you're letting your last winter settle in?..._

Ivan cried himself to sleep.

* * *

><p>"I'm worried about Russia. He seems...different." started Estonia as he started the tea.<p>

"Good different, or bad different?" asked Latvia, who was flipping through the romance novel he had picked up from France. Once again, Russia was locked in his study, working, and he hadn't even told the Baltics what to do for the day yet. So they decided to use this time to relax.

"I'd say bad different. He seems really tired lately, and seems as though he's trying to avoid us. As if he's hiding something."

"Now that you mention it, I haven't really seen him lately. And when I do, he looks really tired."

"Well, I wonder how he'll be at the meeting...Lithuania's pretty darn worried. I'm pretty sure Russia's fine, but you never know."

"The meeting's tomorrow, right?"

"Yes. In Moscow. Apparently Russia requested that it be here for some reason."

"I don't see why."

"Yeah, anything that would have kept the nations occupied after the meeting have been closing down. There isn't much here to do anymore..."

* * *

><p>The day of the meeting, Ivan could barely keep himself up as he got out the door. He wanted to wait for the Baltics to leave his house first, and go to the meeting before he got out. He had hoped that by the time the meeting had started, nobody would notice him. Because he didn't want to have to tell them now. Not now...he didn't think he'd ever feel ready to. How could he? He was going to tell them that he was going to vanish, and never be seen again, and he had to tell them <em>all<em>. Even his loving sisters...how could he ever break the news to them? Because the minute they demanded an explanation, he'd have to go, "Hey guess what, I'm gonna die!" and he'd cause pain. He didn't want to cause any more pain.

He didn't bother taking his medicine, as it seemed it didn't do any help anymore. He was still hurting. He was sore all over, and he really hated standing up, wanting to just lay in his bed or sit on a chair, and not be a nation anymore. Why was his government teasing him so about not signing away his nation yet, and making him suffer more?

He had to walk to the meeting hall about seven blocks away, his body sore with every step, but he knew he'd have to make it there. He had asked Germany to have the meeting there, explaining that he had lots of work to do during that week, and needed to stay close to home. Germany had agreed, but had asked if Russia was alright, noting his voice sounded weak. Russia assured he was fine, excusing that he was tired, and lacked sleep. He was just so relieved that the German had bought it. He didn't want him to know that he was dying over the phone. That would have caused unnecessary stress. The main reason he wanted it to be in Russia, was because he was too weak to travel very far. He also knew that if he got on a plane, and started throwing up blood, it would be a hard to explain to the airline.

He slipped into the meeting room, slipping into his chair very quietly, and to his relief, nobody noticed him, or at least noticed he was different looking. Everything else in the meeting was normal; Italy was bugging Germany about pasta, Austria was poring over a sheet of music, England was telling America to bugger off, and Japan and Hungary were going over their latest SuFin scheme involving bondage. So pretty much the only thing missing was Russia being cold and creepy. But he couldn't anyway, as he was too tired to. But since it was something that was unwelcome, nobody noticed it was gone.

The meeting went on as usual, the arguing between England and France (plus the groping), America's stupid ideas, Switzerland threatening Italy, and Germany trying to bring order. However, although it was usually Canada who took this role, nobody was paying attention to Russia. The violet eyed man was sitting in his chair, watching it all go on, but he wasn't really paying attention to it. He felt increasingly uncomfortable in his chair, and he felt as if a thirty ton weight was being slowly pressed down on him, making him have the urge to throw up. He knew he'd probably feel better if he sat up just a little, but he couldn't, knowing that he might throw up, and cause a panic. But it just hurt so much...

Soon enough the meeting was coming to a close, and as nations were starting to get up and leave, America with a goofy smile called out, "Hey Russia, what good eats have you got here? I noticed all the stores were clo-" he stopped and for the first time during the meeting, saw Russia, and how bad he looked. He was very pale, and sweating, and looked as if he was in pain. His smile wiped away and he asked really worried, "Hey Ivan are you okay?"

It was then that the other nations who were getting up to leave noticed Russia. They then all had a look of surprise and almost horror to see the tall, intimidating nation look so sickly and pained.

Russia couldn't take it anymore, and he stood up, but immediately stumbled over, and gave a ghastly cough into his hand. He felt the red liquid soaking through his glove. He felt tears sting his eyes, realizing that they would now all know. Oh the pain it would cause...

Thankfully he didn't cough up much more blood, and he was able to shakily get back up, only to see looks of horror on all the nations' faces. Except for Prussia, who watched from the back corner, a look of pity on his face.

Germany asked, "Gott Russia! What is the matter with you? Why did you just throw up blood?"

"Blood! Is my brother sick?" asked Ukraine worriedly. She was already starting to tear up. Belarus then shouted from the back of the room, "If he's sick, then I'll get sick too, so we can be sick together!"

Russia looked around the room, to see their faces. England looked both worried and surprised, America looked very worried, Ukraine and Belarus were about ready to jump and hug their brother, Estonia and Latvia looked a bit nervous, China was bewildered, and Lithuania looked incredibly fearful. The rest of the nations looked either worried, confused, or bewildered. Realizing he had no alibi now, the Russian man sighed, choking on his words, "Everyone please sit down again."

* * *

><p>Once everyone was seated, Russia stood behind his seat, gripping to the back of it for support. He looked at all the nations very calmly, but very weakly. They all looked at him, expecting him to say something, their faces showing that they anticipated bad news.<p>

He took a deep breath, and finally said in a monotone, looking at the table, "This will be my last world meeting."

"Until when?" asked England, focusing on the ill nation.

"Ever. This is the last meeting I'll ever attend." he said, not wanting to really add anything more.

Nations exchanged looks of confusion. France asked, "Quoi?"

The silver-blonde took a deep breath before continuing, "My government has been having a critical crisis for the last four months. The economy is crashing, and so is everything else so to speak. Within the next two months, the government will completely collapse, and I will no longer be a nation."

"But brother, that isn't necessarily a bad thing if you're merging with another country." started Belarus trying to assure him, "You could be like Prussia and Ger-"

"Collapsing. Not merging. I won't be joining another country...I'll be disappearing off the map entirely."

This caused the nations to look at each other, trying to confirm what he was explaining. Ivan gripped the chair, feeling the tears burn, and his chest constricting, causing him to wince in pain. He had no other way to explain it now, and he'd have to break the wall completely. He knew he'd feel their pain, their grief, their worry, but he knew it would hurt more if he had died without them knowing the whole truth. He took a deep breath in, and shuddered before he spoke, choking on his words,

"I'll be dead before Christmastime."

He looked, and saw everyone's face was blank, their eyes wide in disbelief. He could see the horror in them growing at a slow painful rate. He didn't want to hear or see their whole reactions. He blinked away his tears, and said very quickly to Germany, who was staring at him in horror, "I'll be taking my leave now...thank you."

He turned around, and walked out of the room without another word, the door shutting with a hollow slam, leaving all the other nations in silence.

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><p><strong>The next update will be quicker, but after that, everything will be much slower, as I'm back in school on Tuesday. The time I'll have to write is on weekends, when I'm home.<strong>

**Now that the truth has been revealed, what will happen?**

**Read and review or I'm ending it all here. 8(**


	14. I'm so sorry comrades

**Continues from last chapter...and more...**

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><p><strong>CNN BREAKING NEWS: THE RUSSIAN GOVERNMENT HAS ANNOUNCED TO THE WORLD THAT GOVERMENT IS COLLAPSING. DISSOLUTION IS IMMINENT FOR RUSSIA.<strong>

The nations sat in absolute silence, staring at one another, once Russia had left the room. They didn't break into a panic, a frenzy, or in some of the nations' cases, begin to cheer. They just sat there, with frozen, shocked faces. Even Sweden was surprised looking. Prussia just sat in the corner, looking down at the floor.

The first to break the horrible silence was Ukraine, who gasped with a choked cry, "Oh my god." and began to sob openly into her hands. Having her sweet little brother tell her that he was dying was the last thing she had ever wanted to hear in her life, and her nightmare was becoming true. Having to see his pale, sick mask cover his bright cheerful face was one stab to the heart after another. Canada reached over from his chair, and wrapped his arms around her, even though nobody except for her noticed him.

Belarus slightly shook her head in disbelief, murmuring with a hiss, "No...no...no...no...NO NO NO!" she shouted then, banging her fist on the table, threatening to get up and run after her brother, but something in her mind made her simply sit back down, and follow her sister's example of crying. Even after her manic attempts to be one with her brother, she couldn't bring herself to see him now.

Lithuania looked around, his eyes filled with complete horror fearing that he'd lose Russia, and asked to nobody in particular, "N-nations can't die can they?"

"Grandpa Rome did..." murmured Italy sadly, who for once in his life looked almost as serious as Germany. Russia had always scared the shit out of him, but since he had seen him so sick, he felt very upset. Romano looked over to his brother at hearing his grandfather's name, and sighed.

"And Vati..." sighed Prussia who was almost boring a hole through the carpet with his stare, remembering Germania.

"The poor bloke..." sighed England, who remembered how Russia had sounded weak months ago. He had known the nation well since he had first met him, and always felt a bit sorry for him. He thought that Russia was always kind of a child, and almost had the urge to get up and discipine him like little America or Canada. But now, Russia didn't look like a child, he looked like someone who was living on the streets.

"Yeah." agreed Prussia, which caused all the nations to stare at him in disbelief. He glared and said, "Look, just because I hate the jerk doesn't mean I want him to die! He's got feelings too you know."

"And when did you get that theory bruder?"

"H-he told me about this three weeks ago when he visited. He made me promise not to tell." sighed Prussia, who honestly felt almost as depressed when his country was merged and his title stripped.

A few of the other nations who had a dislike for Russia nodded, even Poland, who commented, "Like, this is a total downer."

Sealand, whose eyes were filled with confusion and fear, gripped onto Sweden. He had known something was up with Russia, but not something this awful.

China pretended not to care, and said, "It happens aru." Some nations turned to glare at him, and he retorted angrily, "Well it's true, aru!" He didn't really know how to deal with this now. He tried to deny himself that he was upset, and he wasn't going to tell the other nations he was either. Inside, he was absolutely scared and shocked that Russia was collapsing, and that he was going to die. But what could he do about it?

America was staring at the table in absolute disbelief. So that's why Russia wanted to go to Kansas so badly. And that's why he wanted to be his friend. The American clenched his fists, first with fear of losing his friend, then horror and grief, realizing he would, and then anger. Absolute anger. His baby blues became flaming, as he got up and ran out of the room, despite a questioned protest from England.

* * *

><p>Russia walked back home very slowly and almost depressedly. His heart felt like it was about to fall out of his chest, and paint the snow red. He just wanted to go home, and lay in his bed. He had nothing else to do now, but wait until he was dead. He tried to make things better, but he didn't get to finish. He was too sick to do anything now...<p>

America was sprinting, angrily, with adrenaline in his veins, not even caring that he was on ice and snow once he got outside. He turned the corner, and ran two blocks, and soon found the Russian walking home, slowly. He clenched his fists, and ran harder, growling furiously. As he was about two yards from Ivan, he slipped in the snow, and fell face first with an icy crunch. Ivan turned to see the American face flat in the snow, and he walked closer, "Amerika, what are you doing?" he asked, as he offered his hand to help his friend up, but it was swatted away by Alfred, who shouted angrily, "Don't touch me!"

"Alfred...I'm sorry." started Ivan, who stared sadly at his friend's angry face.

"Why? Why didn't you tell me damnit?" yelled the American who was glaring straight at his face.

"I didn't want to hurt you...I didn't want you to know-"

"You didn't want me to know because you just wanted to befriend me to feel better about yourself! Is that it?" asked Alfred angrily, eyes burning with tears. "Did you just fake to be my friend or something?"

"No comrade. I've always wanted to be your friend...I just didn't know when to...when to actually try...I thought that after all those years, you'd have hated me, but you were the best friend I ever had in Kansas..." shuddered Ivan, who felt tears warm his cold cheeks. Alfred clenched his fists once again, and bit his lip, trying to prevent the tears from falling, but to no avail.

"G-God damn it Ivan. Why is it whenever I make a friend it seems I can keep, I have to lose them?" he gritted through his teeth, digging the heels of his hands into his eyes to stop his crying. His soldiers from the war, the bosses whose lives were cut too short...Ivan...it all seemed too much.

"I-I'm so sorry Alfred...I don't want to leave..." whispered Ivan, who was cut off by a life-hanging hug from the American, who shuddered with sobs, crying into the taller one's shoulder. They kept the hug for a while, trying not to believe that Ivan was going to die. Alfred tried to cling onto Ivan as long as he could, so he wouldn't forget what his hugs felt like.

Ivan then dared to say, "Just because I...I'm going to vanish, doesn't mean you'd no longer be my friend...you'll be my friend forever, da?"

"I-I'll hold you to that buddy." sniffed Alfred, who gave a tearstained smile.

* * *

><p>The Baltics had all gotten home about an hour later, having walked slowly in absolute frozen silence. Estonia opened the door first, and went to make some tea, but as he filled the kettle with cold water, his mind went blank, and the water overflowed. He was still trying to process the fact that soon, Russia would be gone, and it would just be him and his brothers. He felt a little sad, because in these past few months, he had been getting to know the better side of Russia.<p>

Latvia felt very confused at the moment, since he was so afraid of Russia, but now he just wasn't sure anymore. Because he knew deep down, Russia wasn't bad, just very messed up. He had been starting to grow fond of the tall nation, and now he was going to see him slip away from the world. It honestly didn't make him any happier.

Lithuania cared for Russia the most out of all three of them, and now his worries had become all out fears. He didn't want to lose Ivan...he didn't. But it was unavoidable now, and he'd have to watch him die. In about two months, he'd have to say goodbye to him, and never see him again. It was painful to think about. How he could love the man who had whipped him, tormented him and his brothers, and separated him and Poland? He didn't know himself, but he knew that he was probably the only one Ivan could be understood by. Yao had left him, and he didn't know about anyone else, assuming they were all afraid of him. Toris was afraid of Ivan sometimes, but he knew that Ivan was more afraid of himself than anyone else.

He felt his breath catch in his throat as he ran up the stairs, and saw Ivan sitting on the side of his bed. The Russian was looking down at his legs, his eyes bleak, and he was very still. Toris choked on his words a little, "I-Ivan?"

Ivan looked up, and saw the Lithuanian man. He then looked down again at his legs. He fidgeted slightly, trying not to look up. Toris walked over and sat down on the bed next to him, and watched the violet eyes tear up, "My Liet...I'm so sorry."

"Please don't be sorry Ivan...it isn't your fault this happened."

"I should have told you...Then this wouldn't have been so hard on you da?"

"It would have been hard for me to learn at any point if you told me. I would have been a bigger wreck if I learned earlier on..."

Ivan shuddered, feeling the tears roll once again, and murmured, "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."

Toris held him close, feeling the taller one's sobs rack through his body, and he rubbed his back soothingly.

_I know you were afraid. It's alright. Everything will be okay._ Toris seemed to be saying to Ivan in his head, although there was nothing but silence.

After a while, after he had stopped crying Ivan hoarsely muttered, "I didn't even get to do something special for you."

Toris smiled a little, "So that's what you've been so busy with these last few months? You've tried to do special things for everyone?"

"Well, not everyone but-" Ivan was cut off by the Lithuanian's lips connecting to his own. Toris smiled, "You don't have to worry about me. I'm perfectly happy with you just being here."

"Oh, da?" asked Ivan, who smiled a little, and kissed back, stroking Toris' brown hair. He decided to deepen the kiss a little, and wrapped his arms around Toris, rolling a little so he was on top, but was careful not to crush his love. Toris blushed, and asked, "R-really Ivan? B-but you're sick and-"

"I'm fine for right now. Anyway, you can't get sick from what I have, da?" he asked, before kissing Toris' neck.

The brown haired nation moaned a little, and his hips jerked a little, turned on at this point. He realized he wanted him now, and that it would be the last time probably that he and Ivan could be together like this before Ivan was too weak to do anything.

"Vanya, i-if you're sure y-" he was cut off by a kiss from the Russian, their tongues battling for dominance now, until they broke away. The violet eyed one smiled, "Da."

* * *

><p>The next morning, Toris woke up in Ivan's bed, alone and naked. He looked around drowsily, and disoriented, but memories of the night before came back to him as he saw his discarded clothes on the floor. Ivan's were gone. Toris got up, and put on his clothes, walking out of the bedroom. He heard shouting downstairs, and slowly went towards the stairs. From the top of the stairs, he could see Katyusha and Natalia standing in the living room, talking to Ivan. Katyusha was the one talking to Ivan, while Natalia was standing and listening. They sounded as if they were arguing.<p>

Unfortunately, Toris couldn't understand much of it, since he only knew so much Russian, that, and the fact they were speaking so quickly and excitedly. But he could see that none of them were happy, and their tone sounded angry.

After a while, the arguing escalated into yelling, and it was almost frightening for Toris to hear Katyusha sound so angry and loud. He could almost translate a few sentences such as from Katyusha, _You're not listening to me, we're just trying to help!,_ _Don't threaten us like that!,_ and _I am your older sister, and you will listen to me!_ Toris could also translate Ivan shouting, _The minute I die, you'll all be rooting through my belongings, leaving my land dry!_ Toris turned his head and saw Eduard and Raivis standing behind him, listening, and gave a confused glance to Toris. He shrugged, not sure himself.

Soon enough, it was enraged yelling downstairs, and they could hear stomping. They soon heard Natalia scream at them in Russian, and soon enough after more shouting, it quieted down. The Baltic states remained upstairs, unsure as to what had just happened, not knowing what the silence was for. Either Ivan had stormed out of the house, his sisters left, or someone died.

The three nations went down the stairs quietly, hoping nobody was dead, and saw Ivan on the couch, crying into Katyusha's shoulder, while Natalia hugged him tightly. They heard him mumble, "I'm just so scared...I'm sorry, I'm just so scared..."

Relieved that it all seemed better, the Baltics went back to work, and later that day saw Ivan, eyes red and puffy, who said softly with a childish smile, "My sisters came to see me today."

* * *

><p><strong>CNN BREAKING NEWS: GOVERNMENT BEGINS TO MASS EVICT RUSSIAN CITIZENS FROM COUNTRY AS IT IS IN CRISIS<strong>

The next day, Raivis and Eduard were out of the house, and Toris was left alone, working and doing chores. Ivan was in his study, writing something, that he said was private. Toris had been curious, but deciding to respect Ivan's privacy let him be.

Toris had been cleaning some plates in an old wood cabinet when he saw Ivan turn the corner of the hallway stiffly. He smiled to Ivan, who smiled back, "I'm going to go upstairs to the library and read. Let me know when Eduard and Raivis are home, da?"

"Alright Ivan." nodded the green eyed man. He turned his head and went back to the dish cabinet. He was almost done with his chores, so if he was in the mood, he could go to the library and keep Ivan company.

A couple minutes later, he heard Ivan's cat Sunflower meow, and the cat began bumping up against his legs. "I'll feed you soon enough, let me fini-" Toris looked and saw the cat's dish was full already. He raised an eyebrow when Sunflower meowed loudly again, and was acting as though he wanted Toris to follow him. Toris rolled his eyes and went over to the cat, who ran towards the stairs. He turned and saw what the cat was signaling to, horrified.

Ivan was at the top of the stairwell, laying almost on his stomach, his lower half on the stairs, and his chest up was on the second floor. He wasn't moving. Toris gasped, and ran up the stairs, and knelt down next to Ivan, and cried, "Vanya?"

Ivan barely opened his eyes, as if he was grimacing in pain, he mumbled, "L-liet, I can't feel my legs."

Toris' eyes filled with horror, and he assured, "I'm getting the phone to call an ambulance."

"Liet don't leave me..." moaned Ivan who was barely moving. He didn't know where he was or what had happened.

"I'll be back, I promise!" he cried, as he ran to get the phone. He called the emergency number quickly, telling them that Ivan had collapsed, claimed he couldn't feel his legs, and seemed to be disoriented. They said they would send an ambulance right away, and Toris ran back to Ivan, who was shivering. His violet eyes were very wide and frightened, and he was still not moving much. Toris grabbed a coat from the closet to keep him warm, and draped it over him. He lay down next to Ivan, rubbing his back, and telling him it was going to be alright. Ivan cried nervously and weakly, "Liet, where am I? I want to go home."

"It'll be alright Vanya." he whispered soothingly to the collapsed man, "It'll be alright."

Soon enough, the ambulance had arrived, and as they put Ivan on the stretcher, he cried, "I want my Liet! L-liet, come back..." He kept on asking for Toris until they forced an oxygen mask on his face, since his breathing was irregular.

Toris, realizing he couldn't leave Ivan alone, quickly wrote a note to Eduard and Raivis, and locked the door as he got into the back with Ivan. He held the scared nation's hand for the whole ride there, until they had to be separated at the ER's door.

And for the whole time that Ivan held Toris' hand, he kept a weak smile under the oxygen mask. He didn't know where he was, but as long as he had Toris, he was happy.

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><p><strong>So now, Russia's back in the hospital. <strong>

**The scene between Ukraine and Russia, what happened was they confronted Russia about it, he got defensive about what had happened and they all started fighting. But it all got better.**

**Haha, and more RussLiet. I actually prefer RoChu or AmeRussia, but it's a good pairing anyway.**

**Next chapter will be my final quick update, because I'm going back to school. But I WILL continue this story. **

**Read and Review or someone besides Ivan dies. That or I have him die next chapter. **


	15. Last Christmas I gave you a Quilt

**Next chapter ooooo...two updates in a day, I'm baaaadass.**

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><p>Estonia and Latvia parked the car out on the street, and went up the long walkway to the house. They had been gone all day, having met with Finland and Sealand that day. It was pretty quiet though, since there was the fact that Russia was very ill now, and it had taken a bit of an emotional toll on a few of them. Sealand had been asking Latvia every hour or so how Russia was doing, and Latvia would give him the same reply, "No better, no worse." When he was at home, it seemed Russia's condition was getting better, and then it would worsen double the next day. Estonia and Finland went on trying to pretend nothing was wrong, but with their younger nations in tow, it was a little difficult.<p>

"Well...that was...interesting." started Latvia, who yawned, long car rides making him drowsy.

"I guess. I think we've had better visits, don't you think? I think once Russia gets better, things will be less tense." Estonia replied. He sighed, knowing he was being too optimistic. Russia wasn't going to get better, he knew. Because every day, it would no doubt get worse.

He unlocked the front door, and called, "Master Russia, Lithuania, we're back." There was no answer, and the house seemed empty. The furnace was turned off, and it was cold.

"Lithuania? Russia?" called Estonia, but there was no answer. Latvia raised an eyebrow as he took off his coat, "Where do you think they are?"

Estonia smirked, thinking of some humorous idea, "Perhaps if they were both in a good mood, they decided to go head for the bedroom?"

Latvia shrugged, "I guess. Can you make me some tea?"

"Sure." agreed Estonia, who fancied a cup himself. He went into the kitchen, and as he got the tea kettle onto the table, he saw a piece of paper on the table in Toris' handwriting. He read it,

_Eduard,_

_When you read this, please take Raivis with you and go to the hospital, or stay with Raivis at home. Ivan collapsed. He is going to be taken on an ambulance, and I need to go with him. That's all I can say, since the ambulance is about to leave._

_Toris_

Without pausing to decide, Eduard turned back around out of the kitchen, and called to Raivis in the living room, "Get your coat back on. We have to go to the hospital."

"What happened?"

Eduard sighed, and rubbed his temples, "Ivan's gotten worse. He had to go in an ambulance."

Raivis gulped, feeling his throat tighten. He hated the idea of people dying, and if Ivan had to go via ambulance, then it was no doubt getting to the end. Ivan wasn't exactly the type of person he'd first mourn for, but he didn't completely dislike Ivan, especially since he had been trying to be better.

They locked up the house once again, and went back to the car. Eduard sighed. It was going to be a long night he could tell.

* * *

><p>They got to the hospital relatively quickly, since there was no traffic. But it was still a tough drive. Because the hospital was not a place that the Baltics really liked to visit on any occasion, unless there was a baby, but when the hell had they ever needed to see a baby?<p>

Estonia was cursing in his head as he tried to find a parking space, and eventually had to park in a handicap space, taking out a fake permit to smack on the windshield.

They got in, and followed the signs to the hall leading to the Emergency Room. They turned a couple of corners, and eventually saw Toris sitting on a bench outside one of the rooms. "Toris!"

The brown haired man looked up, and nodded with a weak, almost sad smile to his brothers. He gripped onto Estonia like a lifeline, and shivered more than Latvia, who hung on too.

"What happened Toris?" asked Estonia, but he was met with a despairing face.

His face lit with horror, "He's not dead is he?"

"No, thank god he's alive." breathed the Lithuanian, "But it's bad. His boss told me that his people are already leaving Russia, and moving to other countries. They've had to be evicted. They're now considering signing off the nation..."

"S-so what happened?"

"Well, they told me in their medical terms that his legs lost all circulation, and the nerves died in them from lack of the blood. He's paralyzed from the waist down."

"Oh my god." whispered Raivis under his breath.

"If he survived this all now, he'd never walk again..."

"How much longer do they think?"

"...the maxiumum they said is two weeks." choked Toris, who tried to not cry.

"D-does he know?"

"Y-yes. To an extent it seems. He doesn't seem to_ care_ what has happened. But then again, they've given him so many pain relievers and tranquilizers that it seems he's pretty drugged down."

"Oh. Well...where is he?"

"He's in one of those rooms. They're trying to get him situated in a bed, and give him a sedative. He's still kind of disoriented with everything, and scared. So we're just waiting out here it looks like until their done."

All three brothers sat on the bench, and said nothing, and huddled together. They stared endlessly at the doors in front of them, wondering which would open, revealing the ill Russian. It was almost like a mental game, guessing which one would open. It didn't open for at least ten more minutes. A nurse opened the door on the left, and said in a thick Russian accent, "You can see him if you like, but let him rest. We made sure that he finally fell asleep. Hopefully if there are no complications, he can return home soon for the rest of...his time. With medicine of course."

"Yes, thank you miss." dismissed Toris, who went in, followed behind by Eduard and Raivis. They stepped in quietly, and saw the large Russian nation laying in the hospital bed, hooked up to different machines, such as an oxygen machine, an IV with water in it, and a wire that led to what seemed nowhere. A plaid flannel hospital blanket was draped over him, and his eyes were closed in peaceful sleep, his chest rising and falling slowly. A hospital band was on his right wrist, that was outside of the blanket, and it read on it, "Ivan Braginsky, Terminal Patient, May be Released"

The three nations just stood there, and watched the Russian sleep. They didn't really have much to do in the dimly lit room, except for that. They didn't know what they were waiting for really, for Ivan to wake up, or for him to pass away. Hopefully it wouldn't be the latter. The scene of all the wires hooked up to Ivan seemed to be overwhelming for Raivis, whose eyes were starting to get wet.

"I-I hate hospitals!" he shivered quietly. Eduard sighed, and patting his back, said to Toris, "I'm taking Raivis home. It's too much for him. I'll come back once he's in bed."

"Alright." sighed Toris, who had been caressing Ivan's hand gently this whole time. Eduard led Raivis out into the hall, closing it with a crack left. He looked back in, to see Toris' eyes clouded over, as if he was in a daze. He then saw the nation crawl into the hospital bed, under the covers, and wrap his arms around Ivan, whispering as if he was in a dream, _"Do svidaniya Vanya."_

* * *

><p>Eduard drove Raivis home, and sent him to bed, making sure his little brother was alright. He then drove back to the hospital. When he got back, Toris was asleep on the bench.<p>

A few days later, Ivan seemed well enough to return home, despite the fact his legs were still paralyzed. He looked tired, but he seemed happier. Toris had been driving him home from the hospital, and noticed a smile on his face, commenting, "You seem really happy Vanya."

"I am. I can't walk anymore."

"Oh...but how does that make you happy?"

"I can't get up and hurt anybody."

"Oh..." answered Toris quietly, hearing the guilt in Ivan's voice.

"Unless I spit at them, da?" smiled Ivan. Toris nearly laughed at that, almost relieved that Ivan was still happy, and had a sense of humor. After being put in a hospital, and losing use of his legs, he was still optimistic and childish as usual. Which was something Toris was going to forever miss. He'd spend these last days with Ivan as best he could. He'd have to anyway, since he'd give Ivan his pain medicine, and sleeping pills at night.

They soon got home, and Toris got the wheelchair from the hospital out of the trunk. He wheeled Ivan up the walkway, and had to do a little maneuvering to get him through the front door. When he parked the wheelchair in the living room to find Estonia, Sunflower came in, and hopped onto Ivan's lap, and settled right down, purring. Ivan stroked the big cat's fur, and smiled once again. Sunflower loved to keep him company when he was sick.

It was quiet in the living room for a while, minus Sunflower's rumbling purr. But then, Ivan could swear that he heard whispering from the drawing room. He slowly wheeled himself down the hall, but heard Toris cry, "Don't come in yet!"

Ivan raised an eyebrow. Why wouldn't he let him in the drawing room out of all rooms? He wanted to go in, and almost did, but the slightly ajar door was then slammed shut, and Ivan heard a lock click.

He frowned, not appreciating being locked out of one of his own rooms. He bumped the door with his wheelchair, which made Sunflower give a grumpy mew, and he heard a voice like Alfred's whisper on the other side of the door, "He's impatient even when he's sick huh?"

Ivan rolled his eyes, and said, "Toris, just be glad my legs can't kick this door down anymore. I suggest you open it before I ram it down with this wheelchair, da?"

The only response was a female laugh like Katyusha's, and some muffled whispers. Ivan realized that there was more people behind the door, meaning that some unlucky nation had decided to be cocky and throw a mean prank on him.

"Toris! Open the door already!" whined Ivan.

"Alright Vanya." replied Toris, who then opened the door revealing the drawing room to a now surprised Ivan.

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><p>The room had been decorated in Christmas decorations, of different kinds. Some ornaments hung from hooks on the ceiling, with red and gold garland, and some Russian christmas treats were out on a table. As well as some of Alfred's "delicious" treats. A decorated tiny Christmas tree was in the corner.<p>

"Merry Christmas Ivan!" shouted Alfred loudly, followed by some quieter holiday greetings from everyone else in the room. The Baltics, the Axis powers, the Allies (minus China), Canada, Sealand, his sisters, even Sweden and Finland (dressed in his Santa suit) were there. Everyone was dressed in some Christmas attire, Alfred's the most obnoxious as it was blinking, with cartoon reindeer on it.

At first, Ivan was absolutely confused, "What's this for? My Christmas isn't until January, and it's only the end of November."

"Well since you can't be here for Christmas, we're bringing it to you!" cheered Alfred, "It was my idea!"

"Non, it was mon." corrected Francis.

"I beg your pardon, but it was mine." started Arthur.

"Shut up all of you." scolded Natalia. "It was mine."

Eduard facepalmed, "It was kind of all our idea, then Finland helped us put it together. We thought of it yesterday, since you came home from the hospital today, we decided to surprise you."

Ivan's eyes lit up happily. He was going to have one last Christmas after all. He gave a cantaloupe smile, and wheeled his wheelchair over, trying to hug whoever he could get into his hold. A few nations embarrasedly allowed him to hug them. He looked to Tino, "What, no weight jokes this year, da?"

Tino rolled his eyes, remembering how he'd always allude to Ivan looking like a better Santa Claus than him, the weight and all, but since Ivan looked so gaunt, he really couldn't anymore. He sighed, and said. "No, but I got you a present anyway. I was going to give you something else, that you get a lot, but I picked something different."

"Oh goody, coal?" asked Ivan with a little contempt as he unwrapped the gift. When he opened the box, his eyes went wide. Inside the box was a quilt. It was clearly handmade, and had different patterns on it. Most of the patterns alluded to winter on one side, but when he flipped it over, there was endless sunflowers on it in warm colors. Ivan smiled, and cried, "Thank you!" to Tino, this time incredibly grateful. He looked as happy as a child, which made everyone somewhat relaxed, having been so worried about him. He wasn't going to leave the world in fear, since there was nothing to fear for him.

He then looked around the room, and asked confusedly, having calmed down over his amazing gift, "Where's Yao?"

Arthur sighed, "I told him to come, but he said he was too busy."

"Oh, da." nodded Ivan, who went on smiling. He draped himself in the quilt, realizing it didn't matter. Even if Yao wasn't ready to forgive him, Ivan had no ill will towards him, and he'd stay that way. He knew that even if Yao didn't love him anymore, it didn't change what he felt for him.

Ludwig then said as he sipped the holiday beer, "Bruder didn't come either. He said he'd rather get eaten by an evil snowman then come here. But he sends these holiday wishes, 'Kiss my ass, merry Christmas.'"

"Oh, da, I see. Tell him that I hope he gets nothing but ninety pound fruitcakes for presents."

"Ja. I'll tell him." sipped the German. Feliciano then pulled out his guitar, "I'm gonna sing-"

"NO!" they all said, fearing an offensive song by him. Feliciano whined, "But I just wanted to sing Buon Natale!"

They all rolled their eyes, and let him play.

"Hey, if he gets a present now, do I get one jerk?" asked Peter to his brother.

"Nope. Not yet." declined Arthur, who was trying to find where on earth Ludwig got the beer.

"You don't even have one for me, do you?"

"Ah..."

"WAAAH! PAPA, JERK ARTHUR DIDN'T GET ME A PRESENT!" cried Peter to Berwald who was sitting by the tree, and looking down by the tree skirt.

"R'ssa, y'r cat's drink'n the tree wat'r." he observed. Ivan snapped his finger, "Sunflower, nyet!" as the cat backed away from the tree licking his lips.

"Big brother, there's mistletoe above you, meaning I have to kiss you." pointed out Natalia, who was holding up a fishpole with the plant dangling on the hook. Ivan rolled his eyes, and said, "On the cheek only." and he turned his head to the side. However, she pulled his face forward, and kissed him right on the lips, making him turn beet red while everyone else was laughing. Oh well, it wouldn't ever happen again, so he may as well let her have a little fun.

"Ludwig, where'd you get the beer?" finally asked Arthur, needing a drink.

"I got it from Poland over there." he pointed. At that moment, everyone had noticed Feliks, and were shocked to see his attire. He was wearing a sleeveless christmas top, red and white, with a red and green miniskirt. He wore girl elf booties, and a santa hat.

"Like, ho ho ho." he greeted, "I'm totally one for these kinds of parties. Drink anyone?" he asked, as he showed the table with liquor on it. Kiku had to take a few hidden pictures to show Elizaveta. She would have loved to see this.

Overwhelmed with happiness, Ivan wiped away a happy tear from his cheek, using his quilt. Tino ponted out, "Hey be careful, that's a Swedish blanket. And I've only got one to give."

Ivan smiled back, and snuggled into it, realizing how warm it made him. Alfred sat next to him, happy as a clam, and began to tell vivid stories about the Christmas trees he had back home, now telling of the one in Rockefeller Square. But Ivan wasn't really listening, although he wish he did. He was far too enthralled with everything his friends had done for him. He had loved them, and now he knew they loved him back. He knew he had nothing to worry about in the end.

He slept under the quilt that night.

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><p><strong>The next update I'll try to get in tomorrow, before school on Tuesday. <strong>

**Read and review or...nothing. I just won't upload the next part.**


	16. The Last of Winter

**There's no commentary at the bottom of this chapter, for a reason, and you'll kind of see why after you read it. I don't want to spoil anything. The next update won't be for a while since school starts tomorrow. I'll try and get these chapters done soon, but it will take a little longer. **

**Read and Review or I'm going to really feel sad.**

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><p><strong>SEVERAL DAYS LATER<strong>

Russia had been somewhat active the next few days after the Christmas surprise, but remained confined to the wheelchair. In the morning, he'd have to call Lithuania up, to help him down the stairs to his wheelchair. Actually, since he was so tall, it took both him and Estonia to carry him down, but it worked in the end. Then for the time, Ivan would stay downstairs, water his sunflowers, and try and talk to someone. He was still very weak, but since he was sitting down he was able to tolerate it all most of the time. But he was still in pain a lot, and took his medicine a lot, even though it didn't always work. He still hurt, although he tried to smile through the pain.

One night, it got so bad, that he was too sensitive to be carried back upstairs, and simply lay on the couch to sleep. He slept very badly that night, having a bit of trouble breathing sometimes, and Lithuania had stayed by him the whole night, fearing it would be the last. However, he woke the next morning, like usual, and was assisted into his wheelchair.

This was worrying Toris to no end, and he had called Katyusha, telling her his troubles of Ivan's condition rising and falling so much. She sadly said not to act so worried, and that in the end Ivan would know when it was time to go. But that's what worried Toris so much, he didn't know what Ivan was thinking, and asking him was no doubt out of the question.

"If anything does happen though...please call us Toris. Natalia and I would always be able to come over."

"Alright, thank you Katyusha. I don't think we have to worry just yet. He seems to be active with the wheelchair a lot, so he might be hanging on a little."

A few days later however, Ivan refused to get out of his bed, and lay there, in a sweater and pants, Sunflower at his side, purring. His Kansas sunflower pin was pinned to his clothes all the time now.

"I'm happy right now. I don't think I need to get out now, da?"

"Ah I guess, but I-"

"Liet, your hair is tangly! Let me fix it da?"

"Oh...yes, thank you Vanya." sighed Toris, who sat on the bed so Ivan could reach the back of his hair. He heard the childish humming of Ivan as the Russian combed his fingers in his hair, and played with his hair. Toris could almost imagine Ivan smiling happily, and his eyes brimming with joy. And as he imagined it, Toris couldn't bring himself to look at Ivan. When the Russian was done playing with his hair, Ivan cheered, "All done! It looks nice!"

Toris snapped out of his daze, "Oh..." and he got up, dismissing very quickly, "Thank you..." and left before his love could see he was crying. But Ivan could see, and wondered for a moment if he had done something wrong.

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><p>One day, Ivan had been in his bed, as he had been for the last three days, writing a letter. Whenever Toris had asked who it was for, Ivan's violet eyes would have a sunny look in them, and he'd shake his head, telling him that he couldn't tell who. All that Toris and his brothers could see from that letter was Ivan scratching the surface with a pen, the paper on a clipboard. Russia wrote words in crippled, squiggly handwriting, since his hands had become so weak.<p>

He knew that the end would be near, but something seemed to grip onto him, not letting himself leave. And he didn't really want to leave just yet, if something was bothering him. And he knew that it would be something incredibly unpleasant now...

He had been proof reading the letter, and smiling at his handiwork folded the letter and from his bedside table's drawer, took out an envelope, and tucked the paper inside it. As he was about to set the letter back on on the table, he felt a chilling breeze from his small bedroom window. The window had opened on it's own, much like a door. Sunflower, who had been asleep next to Ivan this whole time, jumped up and ran out of the room. Ivan frowned as the all too familiar chilled wind blew on his sickly hair from the window.

_Hello 'comrade'..._ he could hear the icy wind whistle from outside. Ivan replied back, "You're not welcome here General Winter..."

_Now, that is not how to treat your greatest friend Russia._

"You never have been my friend, and my name is Ivan. Soon enough this won't be Russia anymore. And you won't be able to take it Winter. Since I won't allow you."

_You're nothing without me Russia. The minute you breathe your last, this whole land will be nothing but Winter. Isn't it lovely?_

"I hate winter." spat Ivan, glaring vehemently, even though there was nothing in front of him, the only indication that Winter was there was the window was swinging wildly, letting in snowflakes that were like hail.

_Do you even know what dying is like, fool? It's nothing but cold. Cold all around. There is no heaven for someone like you, only a dark wintery forest. And you'll get to have it all to yourself. Isn't that what you want?_

Ivan glared even angrier, and looking down for a moment at the quilt he had been given, he saw the sunflowers were facing upwards. He saw the snowflakes landing on top of them covering them, and angrily, he shouted, "I won't let my sunflowers freeze!" and flipped it over, wrapping the quilt sunflower-side inwards, around him. He could almost feel his body get warmer as he wrapped the quilt around himself tighter, and sighed nuzzling into it, his cheeks pink against his pale skin. It was almost as if the fabric sunflowers touching his skin shielded him from the evil cold.

"When I leave Winter, I'll never have to worry about you ever again, da? Because while you are here, in a temporary winter, I'll always be nice and warm in my sunflower fields, without you ever touching them with your damned hands. Because winter can never reach the afterlife." growled Ivan confidnent, no longer afraid of this ice-hearted General.

He could hear the wind growl angrily, sending dozens of vengeful snowflakes into his room, and the gusts icily hissed, _You'd never reach heaven after what you've done. They all hate you..._

"The sad thing about you is that you're not up to date really with what happens during the rest of my year. Those who I thought hated me are now the ones I call my friends. They've kept me happier than I ever have been these last few months. That's amazing compared to whatever 'kindnesses' you've shown me."

He heard a low growl, not like the wind, but like an angry beast, and heard Winter curse in a human-like voice, _You naive, foppish traitor, how dare you turn against me...I'll-_

"General Winter." declared Ivan with not a hint of fear, "You are never allowed in my house ever again!" and all at once, the wind died, the snow stopped falling, and the window slammed shut. The cold air ebbed away almost instantaneously, and there was not a single trace of snow.

Winter never came back for another word.

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><p>Ivan sat up in his bed, and watched the window, making sure for a few minutes that Winter would not come back. And to his luck, he didn't. The window was shut tightly, and the room returned to its normal warmth. Ivan flipped the quilt back over him, unwrapping it, flipping the sunflowers upward, as if he was laying under the field.<p>

It was at that moment, Ivan felt his heart leap. He realized what he hadn't done after this whole time: Stand up to his enemy. He began to laugh, not sinisterly, but genuinely happy, feeling warmth flood through his veins. This whole time, for centuries, winter had coursed through him, eating at him from the inside, and the General liked freezing his heart in the winter, or threatening to. Ivan smiled happily, knowing the Winter was gone for good. He felt better, not physically, but mindwise. He had feared Winter more than anything, and now that he had been driven away, he felt no worries, no sadness, nothing but peace.

Toris came in about ten minutes later, to give Ivan his afternoon dose of medicine, when Ivan said, "I feel much better." and as he took the medicine, smiled,"Much better."

Toris felt relieved, "Oh that's wonderful." he smiled. He was hoping that maybe if Ivan himself said he was feeling much better, then it was a sign that his government was taking a turn for the better. He then had the urge to hug Ivan, who was smiling enough to light up a cathedral. He looked so happy, that Toris wished he could have forgotten that he was on his deathbed. He hugged Ivan tightly, and the Russian hugged back gently.

Toris had been relieved that Ivan told him he felt better, because he thought that Ivan really was getting physically better. However Ivan had meant that he felt completely happy, and that nothing had been holding him burdened anymore. He felt free of trouble, and at peace.

Ivan's cat then jumped back up on the bed, with a little bounce from his chubby belly, and sat on Ivan's stomach. Ivan smiled once more, and snuggled the cat as he scooped him up in his arms.

Toris then thought to himself that he didn't have to worry about Ivan anymore.

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><p>For the rest of the day, it went along pretty normally, and for once, the Baltics didn't feel worried about Ivan very much. He had been sitting up in bed, smiling, and optimistic.<p>

After dinner, they decided to stay with Ivan, and keep him company. Sure the cat was always on his bed, but he couldn't really talk to him. They made some tea, and taking some upstairs offered the large nation a cup. He declined the tear, but invited them to sit down and stay if they wanted. And surprisingly...they did...without any fear. They willingly sat down and talked to Ivan, the nation of Russia, who they had always feared in the past. But after all this time, they didn't fear him anymore. And they realized that when he was gone, they'd feel something was missing from their life, and be sad.

They all talked about nonimportant things, like people, not nations. Ivan kept a peaceful, genuine smile on his face as he spoke, and as he listened. He enjoyed spending his time like this, speaking to his friends, laughing or crying with them, and just being with them. It was what he had always wanted, and since he had found his friends in the nations around him, he had savored every minute of it. He preferred listening to the Baltics speak, more then speaking to them. Because it felt good to hear them talk casually to him. In the past, he'd try to make conversation, and only get a few polite answers, and nothing else. He had always wanted something like he had now.

After a long time, the clock struck a late hour, and the Baltics excused themselves to go to bed. Ivan then asked, "I'd like a goodnight hug, da?"

Eduard and Raivis hugged him and said goodnight, returning to their rooms. Toris then said, "I'll go get you your medicine before I go to bed."

"No, it's alright, I don't need it." shrugged Ivan calmly, cheeks pink and violet eyes bright as he smiled, "I don't feel any pain tonight."

"Well alright then." replied Toris smiling, who bent down to kiss Ivan's cheek, and pulled up the sunflower quilt higher for him. Ivan then wrapped his arms around Toris, and kissed his cheek back.

"Goodnight my Toris." he smiled softly, feeling warm on the inside from having kissed him. A few minutes later, he fell asleep, still smiling softly.

"Goodnight Vanya." whispered Toris with a smile, as he then turned around, and turned out the light.

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><p>Ivan never woke up.<p> 


	17. Not Ready to Let Go

**Very tired right now...don't want to comment much. R&R or no new chapter.**

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><p>Toris had woken up at about three in the morning, feeling the need to relieve himself. He blinked until his eyes until they had adjusted to the dark, and slowly got out of bed to use the toilet. When he was finished, he was walking past the other bedrooms, when he saw two glowing pink circles in the dark. He did a double take, and saw it was Sunflower, standing right outside Ivan's bedroom door. The cat wasn't motioning to anything, just standing outside the doorway, staring up at Toris, blankly. Toris could see from the hallway that Ivan was asleep in his bed.<p>

Toris found nothing really out of the ordinary, other than the cat was staring straight at him, which was kind of creepy at night. So he decided to go back to bed. But as he got back into bed, he felt like he was being followed. He turned his head and saw the cat sitting at the foot of his bed, staring at him still. Sunflower's eyes were violet, just like his owner's but being a cat were a bit more peircing at night.

Toris rolled his eyes, and rolled over on his bed, facing away from the cat. He thought it would stop bothering him, but all of a sudden, he heard a mournful sounding meow emit from the animal's throat. He ignored it, assuming the cat was just being pesky, but about ten seconds later, it gave another meow. Realizing he'd never get to sleep with the meowing, he got up, scooped the cat up, and walked out of his room, and down the hall to Ivan's room.

Walking into the room, quietly so as to not wake Ivan, he uncerimoniously dumped the squirming ball of brown fur onto Ivan's bed. With a little bounce however, Sunflower leaped off the bed, and sprinted into a corner, hunched up, with his pupils now just slits. Toris tilted his head, confused. Why was the cat acting so strange? He didn't really know much about them, since Ivan took care of Sunflower most of the time.

"Sunflower, come on, don't be so strange. You like sleeping on the bed with Ivan, don't you?" asked Toris quietly. He picked the cat up, and tried to take him back over to the bed, but the animal squirmed out of his arms, and hid back in the corner.

Sighing, Toris decided to ask Ivan, "What's up with your cat? He's acting kind of weird."

Ivan didn't even stir. Toris tilted his head, and placing a hand onto the mattress, it sank down. Ivan didn't even budge to that either. Toris asked, "Ivan?" but recieved no response, not even a mumble, hum, or moan. Toris lay down next to Ivan on the bed, and watched him very closely, to see if his chest rose and fell, and if he twitched in his sleep.

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><p>It was a split second later that Toris fully realized that Ivan wasn't breathing. He felt a shock of panic go up his spine as he sat up from the bed, and took two fingers, and put them up to Ivan's neck, searching for a pulse. There was nothing, and all Toris felt was unnaturally cold skin. It wasn't ice cold like winter, but as in dead cold, which was even more panic-striking as the room wasn't even that cold. Toris held his fingers there longer, as he desperately searched for a pulse. He didn't want to believe just yet that Ivan was dead. Of course he wasn't. He was fine the night before, talking, smiling, and laughing. He said he was better, so he couldn't be dead. He couldn't be dead because Toris wasn't ready to say goodbye to him.<p>

The reality sank in very slowly and painfully, as Toris took away his hand. He turned on the lamp on Ivan's nightstand, hoping that he would wake up, but nothing changed. Toris could however see Ivan's face clearly now. Ivan looked as though he was asleep under his quilt, one hand was splayed over the sheets, the other most likely under, or on his stomach. A soft, frozen smile was on his face. He was happy, even in death.

Toris felt his eyes burn with tears, as he shuddered, and choked out, "N-no. No not yet Ivan. D-don't go just yet. I-I'm not ready for it..." he pleaded, as if Ivan would hear his pleas and wake up instantly. He cried more, "P-please come back...please..."

Had Toris said this much earlier, Ivan might have heard him, and have been able to let him say goodbye. Toris wouldn't know this for about ten more minutes, but Ivan had died at least two hours ago. There was no suffering.

Toris sat on his knees next to Ivan's bedside, pleading and crying for him to open his eyes, but the Russian couldn't hear him. He was cold and still, as if he was nothing but a shell. Toris felt the hot tears rolling down his face as he cried, in absolute disbelief. Ivan wasn't supposed to die. He was supposed to get better, and his country would get back to normal, and Ivan would be his normal childish, but creepy self. He wasn't supposed to die. He was supposed to use his legs again, and chase after the Baltics again, smiling that big happy smile that they had feared, the different one. He wasn't supposed to die. He was supposed to go back to arguing with the other nations, and showing his authority. He wasn't supposed to die...because Toris didn't want him to...

Toris, trying to find a glimmer of hope, ran downstairs, and flipped on the newly bought TV, hoping to prove his fears wrong. His heart crashed when he saw the breaking news sign that read in Cyrillic, "CNN BREAKING NEWS: RUSSIAN GOVERNMENT HAS COLLAPSED, COUNTRY OFFICIALLY DISSOLVED AT 1:15 AM" Toris watched the videotaped footage of the leaders signing away the nation, and stared in absolute horror at the footage and words running across the screen. He felt his heart nearly shatter as he watched them sign away Ivan's life, and if they had known what they had just done, Toris would have run to them, and torn at them, screaming "MURDERERS!". Toris could only imagine this in his mind, as he sobbed harder. He ran back upstairs, and pleaded with Ivan, "It's not true! It's not true!" but Ivan still smiled, his violet eyes closed in darkness.

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><p>Eduard had been woken up by Toris' sobbing. He didn't exactly know what the noise was, but as he heard the desperate cries of Toris, and wailing, he felt his heart sink, <em>Oh no...<em> he realized what had happened. He got up, and walking to Ivan's bedroom, saw the glow of the bedside lamp. He then looked in to see the grieving Toris as he lay, or kneeled over Ivan's bedside, splaying himself on top of the still one. It didn't take long for Eduard to conclude that Ivan was dead.

He then simply watched Toris, eyes clouded with pity and sadness, and quietly asked, "How long has he been...like that?"

Toris jolted his head back a little in surprise, realizing he wasn't alone, and saw Eduard, without his glasses. He wiped his eyes, and trying to speak clearly, choked, "About two hours...th-they..." he shuddered, "...signed the dissolution paper at about 1:15..."

Eduard then saw Ivan's smiling face, and putting a hand on his brother's shoulder, helping him up, commented reassuringly, but softly, "Well, he was asleep no doubt. He didn't even feel a thing. And he looks happy..."

Toris peeked a wet green eye towards the body, and seeing the Russian's lifeless smile, realized Eduard was right. Ivan didn't end up dying lonely and cold in a hospital, or lost in the wild, like he almost had many years ago following a breakdown he had, where he ran away into the frozen woods. Ivan _did_ look happy. But Toris couldn't help but feel he didn't get to say goodbye. He had been so sure that Ivan was going to get better, and now his hope had crashlanded. He shook, absolutely overwhelmed by everything, and cried harder, while his brother hugged him tightly, rubbing his back soothingly.

He could feel himself get lead out of the room gently, and he turned his head to get one last glimpse of the peaceful Ivan before Eduard shut the door. Had Toris not been crying so hard, and felt so much grief, he could have imagined that the Russian was just asleep, dreaming of sunflowers. He was gently prodded down the stairs, the hallway light turned on by his brother. On his way down the stairs, his brother accidentally kicked him in the back of the foot, which startled him. "Sorry, can barely see much without my glasses." the blond excused.

Toris walked over to the couch and sat down, staring at the floor, absolutely devoid of any emotion, but the tears were still falling. He then drew his legs up, and lay on his side, on the couch, staring at the wall. Eduard sighed sadly, and sat on the other end of the couch. He didn't watch his brother, he just stared in front of himself, vision blurred without his bifocals. It was absolutely silent in the morning dark, except for the sniffling and heavy breathing coming from the brown haired man.

Eduard then dared to break the silence, "...Should I wake up Raivis and tell him?"

Toris sniffed, and sighed, "...yeah. Go ahead..."

Eduard drew in a deep breath, got up from the couch. He really hated to have to break the news to his brother, but he knew that Raivis trusted him the most, so it was no doubt the best. He slowly walked upstairs, and walked into Raivis' room. The younger nation was facing towards his bedroom wall, away from the door, so Eduard couldn't figure out if Raivis was asleep or not. His question was answered when the boy twisted his body around to face his brother.

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><p>"I'm sorry, did I wake you?" asked the older one. Raivis shook his head a worried expression on his face, "No, the light woke me up earlier. Ed, what's going on? Why are you up so early?"<p>

"Latvia..." started the nation who put a hand on the boy's shoulder, and realized he couldn't walk around the sad fact, and knew Raivis was old enough to understand, "Latvia, Russia died this morning." he said bluntly, but calmly.

Absolute silence.

The honey-haired boy didn't speak, and Eduard could see that Raivis had not expected such an answer. The young one began to turn very pale, and his eyes reflected shock and confusion. Eduard bit his lip, "I'm sorry I-"

"It's alright..." quivered the boy, very quietly, as if he was about to cry. But to his brother's surprise, he didn't. He just looked down, then his eyes seemed to seem more curious than upset, "So is that why I hear Liet crying?"

"Um...yeah. He's really upset about it. I don't blame him really..."

Raivis then bit his lip, and asked sadly and a little fearfully, "S-so...what happened?"

"They signed the dissolution agreement earlier...he...he just died in his sleep, nothing else..."

"Oh..." nodded Raivis. He then got up out of bed, and went walking out of his room very slowly, and almost unsure. Eduard then asked, "Where are you going?"

"To go comfort Toris. He's probably been hit harder by this than us."

"Y-yeah...I guess so..." slowly agreed the Estonian man. Raivis had been so calm right now, even after being told that Ivan had died. Eduard was somewhat impressed, but almost frightened by his brother's sudden maturity in taking this type of situation. Raivis didn't tell anyone, but when he had last talked to Ivan alone, two days before he passed away, the Russian had asked him to not be afraid anymore when he was gone, since he wouldn't have him standing in his way. Raivis decided to aim for this, since Ivan had asked for nothing else from him after that. He had braced himself for the day this would happen. He missed Ivan, they all would, but he knew Ivan was at peace, so he was somewhat happy too. He'd show both his brothers and Ivan (if he was still watching him...) that he was a brave nation, and he'd make them all proud.

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><p>About an hour later, all three had been sitting at the table, drinking tea out of plastic cups. The china that they had used in the past had been Ivan's, and now they just didn't feel like using it now. They had also closed the door to Ivan's study so they wouldn't have to look at his work, and belongings. Sunflower lay on the heater near the table, and seemed...depressed...for a cat at least.<p>

Once again, Eduard spoke first, "Hey Toris?"

The nation whose eyes were red and puffy looked up, "Yes?"

"D-do you remember the night when Ivan was sent to the hospital, just before I left?"

"U-um...a little...why?"

"I-I saw you crawl into bed with him...and you said...you said goodbye in Russian to him..."

"I did?" he asked, confused, "I don't remember that..."

"Well, when I came back, you were asleep..."

"I-I do remember waking up in the hall, but not crawling into the bed with him...or saying goodbye..."

"Well, I saw you before I left...I don't know, maybe you just are so overwhelmed right now you forgot..."

Toris then felt a hand on his shoulder, "But don't think you didn't say goodbye. You did, in the best way I can think of."

Toris smiled a little at his brother for trying to cheer him up. But he honestly didn't remember a single thing about staying with Ivan in the hospital bed. He remembered waking up on the hospital bench, but never falling asleep in the hospital bed. But he wasn't sure that his brother was lying.

He then sighed, "I guess...we should call Ukraine and Belarus soon..."

"...And Germany, so he can tell the rest..." added Raivis who barely touched his tea, "Who's gonna call them?"

"I will." sighed Lithuania, "You guys...ah...t-take care of Ivan...please..." he continued, holding back the growing urge to cry again. Realizing that Toris meant to cover up Ivan, and possibly call a hospital to hang onto his body until they could arrange burial services, the other two nodded. After they sat in silence a moment, they got up, and headed upstairs to Ivan's room.

Eduard got out an extra large sheet to cover the entire bed from the closet. Raivis quietly opened the door. He walked in and looked at Ivan silently. Just before Eduard threw the sheet over, Raivis commented, "Funny...this is the first time I've seen him...he looks happy..."

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><p>Toris was hesitant to pick up the phone, his hands shaking from both grief and nervousness. He had finally stopped crying, but he was still shaken up. He could only fear what the conversation between him and Ivan's sisters would be like, when he broke the news. He knew Katyusha was always kind of emotional, but he was far more fearful of Natalia's reaction, which he was certain would be violent.<p>

He slowly clutched the reciever, and picking it up, drew in a deep breath before dialing the number. He slowly punched the numbers in, his heart was like absolute lead in his chest. He did not look forward to saying the words, but they were like water contained behind his closed lips, and would run out should he open them.

He put the phone to his ear, and hearing the dial tone, felt his spine jump up with icy emotion. This was it...

He heard the other line click in, and heard a sleepy , "Hello? Who is this?"

"H-hello Miss Belarus? It's Lithuania. I called Ukraine didn't I?"

He heard her give an annoyed snort, "She's here, I'm just staying with her until brother gets better. Why in the world did you call us at 5 AM?"

Toris felt his chest constrict, and he shuddered, "C-could you just get Ukraine please?"

Natalia paled, fearing what had happened, if Toris sounded so upset on the other line. She went to her sister's room, "Kat! Phone!"

Katyusha sleepily called out, "Who is it...what time is it?"

"5 AM...and it's Lithuania..."

Katyusha's eyes went wide, and predicting the worst, got up and headed for the phone. She was afraid to hear it, but she somewhat had a feeling of what might have happened.

She took the phone, "Toris?"

"Katyusha..." she heard him reply so melancholy, that she was almost certain now. She bit her lip, trying not to cry.

"I...I think I know what happened...i-is he...?"

Toris shuddered, and holding back a sob, replied with a choked whisper, "Y-yes. This morning...H-he just fell asleep and didn't wake up..."

Katyusha's big blue eyes shone with sadness, and tears began to spill out quietly, as she tried not to cry audibly. She covered her mouth, trying to muffle any sobs that might have emitted. She had prepared herself for when this might happen, but it didn't make it any easier. Even if she knew about it before hand, in the end, she still lost her little brother.

"I'm so sorry Kat..." shuddered Toris, as he began to let his tears fall too. Having to tell people that Ivan was dead over and over was not going to get any easier, even if he tried to not cry. Because whenever he said it, it hurt him so much, knowing it would be sad to hear. He was able to stop his tears quickly this time though, and comfort Katyusha, as he heard her cry over the phone.

Natalia, judging by her sister's crying, felt a rock in her stomach, as she was now certain as to what had happened. She clenched her fists angrily, leaving red crescent cuts in her palms from her finely manicured nails. She felt tears burn in her eyes as she finally realized that she'd never see her brother again.

Katyusha sniffed, and smiling sadly whimpered as she tasted the tears running down her cheeks, "W-well at least he's at peace...I-I'm happy to know that he didn't end up dying in a hospital or something...he was with you..."

Toris nodded, and bit his lip, drawing blood, but it prevented him from crying anymore. He'd be able to comfort Ivan's family now.

It was silent on the phone for a while, minus the crying, and "I'm sorry"s, until Katyusha asked, "C-can we see him?"

Toris sighed, "If you come over soon enough...the hospital will be taking his body into care at about 4:00 PM. You can come over...if you want..." he offered, tiredly.

After more silence, Katyusha finally said goodbye, and hung up. She felt herself break again as she covered her eyes with her hands, and began to sob openly. She felt someone hug her tightly, and felt their own body racking with cries. She saw her little sister bury her tear stained face into her shoulder, and they both comforted eachother.

Right on the kitchen floor. But they didn't care. Grieving like this wasn't formal anyway.

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><p><strong>Update: Okay, sorry for all the typos and shit. I'm going to K-con today, so I was busy last night getting ready.<strong>

**I'm sorry for not having replied to reviews, school's been a b*tch, but I have read them all, and I feel so happy knowing that you guys like it.**

**There was one particular review that really touched my heart. It was by an unsigned reader Neo-Kun, who told me her father died of cancer and how this story affected her personally, and made her think of her father. Her story really moved me to tears, and I give all my love to her family, and those who have lost a loved one. It's amazing how a simple story can affect someone so much, and how a review can, too.**

**Read and Review or the next chapter is not gona be updated.**


	18. I'm Losing You

**Next chapter...sorry for such long updates. School is tough.**

**Read and Review or I'll kill someone else off.**

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><p>Germany had recieved an email from Lithuania about an hour later. He had been up for a while, the time differences varying in the countries, and had been about his normal business that day. He had checked his email as usual, and when he read the email, his eyes shot up, and his mind went absolutely blank. He looked down in his lap, and tried to think clearly again. In the other room, Prussia was laying on the couch, beer can in hand, simply watching television, when a breaking news sign flashed in German. About ten seconds later, the breaking news was issued, and the albino's face went blank. He felt a spike of shock in his chest, and shouted out, "WEST!"<p>

Germany, hearing his brother scream, snapped back to present, and ran in, trying to see what was the matter. Prussia was pointing at the television, his hand shaking slightly, and his eyes wide in shock. In German, the words on the news loosely translated out to, COUNTRY OF RUSSIA HAS FALLEN. Germany looked at the news, the footage of the signature of dissolution, and the words on the screen. He saw the absolute surprise in his brother's face, and sighed, rubbing his forehead with his hand.

"None of the other countries know yet, do they?"

"Nein. Lithuania has just sent me an email telling me what happened. So that's why the news has broken here." replied Germany as he took his formal clothes out of the dresser, and changed into them.

"So...so what are you going to do?"

"Hold a meeting."

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><p>Pretty much all of the countries that Germany had contacted had made it to the meeting in Germany about five hours later. He had sent them individually an email that simply read, "Meeting in Berlin today, come IMMEDIATELY." If the email had come from Germany and told them to come ASAP, then they usually did, knowing it meant big serious business. They had all taken their fastest mode of transportation, and made it there relatively quickly. As they all got into their seats when they arrived, they noticed that the Baltics hadn't arrived just yet. And they had usually always been early. But then there was the fact that Russia was sick, so maybe they were taking care of him. And by the time it seemed everyone was in their seats, America noticed that not only the Baltics were absent, but so were Ukraine and Belarus. He bit his lip, fearing that something might have happened. Nothing happened, he told himself. This was just a regular meeting, just a little rushed. Russia was sick, so his family was just taking care of him, that was all. He wasn't gone. He wasn't gone, America wasn't ready to lose his good friend, he wasn't gone.<p>

Many of the other nations had a slight guess of that too, but had also assumed that they were simply absent. Germany then cleared his throat, and the curious nations turned to see what he had to say. He closed his eyes, and taking a piece of paper, said very seriously,

"Gutentag."

It was still silent.

"I have called this meeting to reveal some very unfortunate news."

America's breath caught in his throat, as he heard the next sentence, "I recieved a message from Lithuania that the Russian Federation fell, and dissolved via the government's orders, early this morning." This made China look up quickly.

The American then gave what sounded like a mix between a gasp and a breath, his eyes reflecting confusion and horror, as Germany finally revealed, saying it as if he didn't believe it himself, "Ivan Braginski died at approximately 1:15 AM Moscow time."

Many of the nation's faces changed into faces of shock, some audibly gave a gasp, covering their mouth with their hands. As England heard the words, his normally calm green eyes shot up, widely, and a mix of emotions were coursing through them. He looked down at the table, and fixated his eyes on the top, not staring at it, but losing himself in his mind. He couldn't believe that this was true. Russia couldn't be dead, he was alive a few days ago, smiling and happy. He couldn't have died so quickly like this. The bushy browed Britain then sighed, biting his lip, remembering how he and Ivan had become good friends. He felt the burn in his eyes and lump in his throat, realizing very quickly that it might change into weeping, but he was able to compose himself. But only when he heard a gasped breath come from the nation next to him.

He turned and saw Alfred hunched up, tears running down his face like heavy sweat, and he shuddered as the sobs racked through his body. He covered his face with his gloved hand, and lay his head on the table. Arthur sighed, not imagining how much this had affected his former brother. Alfred and Ivan had become such close friends in the last few months, even if they didn't see much of each other. They would call, write letters, and email each other, skyping too, just to check up on each other's 'buddy'. Alfred was absolutely devastated, not still comprehending that his friend was gone. It wasn't fair. He had become so close to Ivan, that he didn't want to let him go. But he didn't let Ivan go in the end. Ivan had let go. Alfred clenched his fists angrily, and hit the table angrily, spitting a little, sniffing with his tears. Ivan just let go, he didn't even try to stay alive, thought Alfred. Ivan broke his promise, he promised he'd always be his friend, but now he's gone. He just left, not even telling them WHEN he would go. When the country of Russia fell, it wasn't too much of a tragedy to everyone else's people, but it was a tragedy to Ivan's friends.

Alfred felt someone put their arms around him, and rub his back soothingly. He didn't really know who it was at this point, but right now, he really didn't care, the arms were warm and comforting, so he let himself fall into them, shuddering as he sobbed. He pressed his face into the green jacket of the person, and felt the fabric. He continued his grief, letting his tears soak into the other body's coat as it muffled his cries.

Arthur hugged the other one gently, and smoothed his sandy hair soothingly. He murmured softly, "It's alright. It's alright. He didn't want to leave you, I'm sure. He cared about you very much."

Most of the other nations watched on in sad silence, as the Englishman comforted the American, not heeding the other nations. A few had no emotion in their faces, and were looking down at the table, unsettled by the American's near hysterical crying. Some nations began to cry too, but very silently, as they all looked at each other, unsure of what to do now. Feliciano was silently crying a little, as his brother patted him on the back. They all stared at the empty chair where Russia always used to sit at, his placecard still there from past meetings. They heard Arthur murmur to Alfred, "It's alright, he's free now. He's not sick anymore, he's free."

Gilbert, who had been sullenly sitting in his chair, emotionless in face, slowly looked around the room, and eyed the empty chair of the fallen country. He got up, without a word, getting a confused look from his brother, but paid no heed to it. He walked over to the chair, slowly and deliberately, and stood to the right of it, staring at it intently. He imagined to himself that he could see a faint outline of the deceased Russian. He then slowly raised his hand, and saluted to the empty chair, and said with a twinge of pity, "Rest im Frieden, Russland." and without another word, went back to his seat and sat down.

After that, a few other nations started to utter something, in their own languages. If they had all spoken the same language then, they might have said, "Rest in peace." to Ivan. With a sigh, as he let the red faced Alfred go with a gentle stroke on the back, Arthur asked Ludwig, "So what are we going to do now?"

"I would assume Ivan's family would be in charge of any arrangements for burials or such, so I don't think we need to worry about that. But I don't think it takes half a mind to know that they are grieving at this point, and would appreciate our condolences or such. Lithuania told me that they'll let people come over later if they wish..."

The Brit nodded, and said, "I'll probably visit them later, to see if they're alright."

"H-hey Iggy..." started Alfred in hiccups as he tried to calm his crying, "I'll come with you...I-I wanna go see if Lithuania is okay, but I don't wanna..." he started, trying not to cry again, "I don't want to..."

"It's alright lad." assured the Englishman with a pat on the back, "You don't have to go alone."

"I guess it would be a good idea if I went with Angleterre too." started Francis, who sighed sadly. He had never been particularly close to Ivan, but they had sometimes gotten along (not always) and the Frenchman would miss the Russian.

"Sniff...hey it's kind of like an Allies reunion, all we'd need is China. Hey Yao-" started Alfred, who looked over and saw the Chinese man's chair was pushed out, and they saw the door slam shut.

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><p>Yao's boots crunched the snow below his feet, and his cheeks were pink from the cold, not tan like usual. He kicked the snow angrily as he walked briskly to the street crossing. He bit his tongue angrily as he continued walking, not caring what would happen now. As he made it to the crosswalk, he heard quick tiny crunches behind him, and an angry British accented voice shout, "Just where do you think you're going div?"<p>

The ebony haired man turned and said with an annoyed growl, "I'm going home aru. Germany shouldn't have disrupted me like this."

Arthur shouted, enraged with how unfeeling Yao was, "You ballsack! Ivan's been sick and dying for six months, he told you last month, he's dead now, and you don't even care?"

With a bite to his voice, just wanting England to leave, China spat, "It happens. It sucks but it happens aru. It's not my proble-"

His sentence was cut off by a hit to the face by Arthur's fist. The force of the blow surprised Yao, and knocked him to the ground. The right side of his face kissed the icy snow, which stung his skin. Arthur would have never thought of punching out Yao like that, but the Chinese man had really pissed him off.

"You git. You bastard. You ballsucking nutter, Ivan cared endlessly for you even when he was falling apart, and you showed no concern for him. He tried to make things good again between you two, but you wouldn't let him."

Yao still lay on his snow pillow. He bit his lip angrily, feeling his eyes sting. A bruise would no doubt form on his face from the whack Arthur gave to his face.

"You hurt him, and you didn't care. But I would think that he wouldn't care either for a piece of shit like you. I'd think he'd have given up on you. I don't know what's even happened to you. You used to be so nice Yao. And now you're even colder than Russia was." he spat.

Tears were beginning to form in Yao's gold eyes, and his face flushed, warming his cold cheeks. Arthur's piercing green eyes glared at him once more, before the British man turned his head, and said, "The rest of the Allies and I are leaving to go see to his sisters and the Baltics. It's somewhat of a courteous duty, wouldn't you think? I'm guessing you wouldn't even want to go."

Before he could take another step, he heard the Chinese man utter, "I can't go..."

"Oh?" he raised a thick eyebrow, "And why?"

He heard Yao shudder with a sob, and heard him choke as he got up, "Y-you know why, aru. I've treated him so badly, I've ignored him, even when he was dying. And now he's gone, and I can't make up for it."

Arthur tilted his head as he heard Yao burst out into another sob, "He tried to make it better between us, be my friend again, and I just pushed him away. He still loved me, and I hurt him, aru. It won't make any difference now that he's dead!"

The blonde connected the final puzzle piece, with a sigh, "You still love him don't you?"

The tears burst and flooded from the golden eyed man as he cried, and nodded, "Y-yes! I still love him, I always did aru. I love him more than anything! B-but he just wanted to be friends, and I wanted to be with him again...and now he's gone...I-Ivan, oh god...Ivan aru..." sobbed Yao.

Arthur, his eyes softening, wrapped his arms around the sobbing nation, "Well, then if you come with us today, maybe we can get things sorted out."

"I-It's too late for me to do anything, aru! Ivan's dead, so he'll never know..."

"Yao, don't be so afraid. When I last saw Russia, he was happier than any lad on Christmas, so he was no doubt at peace up to the very end. It will all be alright." murmured Arthur, who stroked the other's dark hair soothingly.

And for once, Yao obliged.

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><p>By the time the Allies got to Ivan's former house, Ivan's body had been taken off to the hospital until burial arrangements were confirmed. The workers at the hospital took pity on viewing of Ivan's corpse, once commenting, "Shame he had to die so young."<p>

Toris heard the door knock, as he was cooking some borscht. He hadn't eaten all day, and even if he wasn't hungry, he knew he had to eat something. But as he opened the door, he saw America, England, France, and China. Toris' green eyes shined a little, "Hello..."

"Bonjour. Germany told us that...we're just really sorry..." started Francis, for once not being a pervert. They all noticed how red Toris' face was, from crying no doubt. He looked like he was trying to give a happy smile, but it looked very hard to do, since it was a very frail weak turn of the corners. It had been a long, horrible day, and he was trying his best not to break down again. He saw that Yao and Alfred's faces were red too, and wondered if they had been crying too.

"So...um...I have some tea if any of you would like some...let's talk in the drawing room..." he started, inviting them in. As they all went into the drawing room downstairs however, Yao went quietly up the stairs, curious to see if he would find Ivan there, sitting up in bed, welcoming him back. But when he found Ivan's room, and opened the door quickly, there was nothing. Not even the body. Ivan's room was empty of people, and seemed lifeless. Yao walked over to the bed, and saw the sheets were undone, as if they were tossed back. A quilt of sunflowers lay melted over the side, as if it was carelessly tossed.

Yao picked up the quilt curiously, and eyed the sunflowers. Was that what Ivan had dreamed of in heaven? His endless fields, all nice and warm? Yao hesitated a little, and then put the quilt back down, folding it on the bed. He jumped back with a start when he heard a voice say, "They took him away a little while ago."

He turned to see Toris holding a cup of tea, and looking into the room. Yao bowed very quickly, "I'm sorry for breaking in here, aru. I was just looking."

"Oh..." started Toris. He had half a mind to kick the Chinese man for how he had treated Ivan, but he realized it wouldn't be good, so he wouldn't.

"S-so...what happened aru?"

"You mean how he died? Well, a falling country is instant death sort of. He was fine the evening before, but he just didn't wake up." started Toris, "He just passed away in his sleep..."

Yao bit his lip, "I guess it's the best way to go aru."

"Yes...And I think he was happy. He was smiling, and he looked so peaceful."

"I think that's how he would have wanted it, aru."

Toris smiled a little, "I think so too. Now, could you come back downstairs? We found something in here earlier that we need to discuss with you all."

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><p>The Axis powers arrived rather quickly when Lithuania had called, and once they were all seated at the table, Germany unfolded the piece of paper, and read silently, and put it down.<p>

"What is it?" asked Estonia, peering over curiously.

"His will."


	19. The Last Will of Ivan Braginski

**This chapter is much shorter since it is just the will. The next chapter will be posted later.**

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><p><em><strong>THE LAST WILL OF IVAN BRAGINKSI<strong>_

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><p><em>I, Ivan Vladimir Braginksi leave my possessions to the people named below. They will each be given their specific share.<em>

_Each person will recieve an equal amount of money, which will be divided by Arthur Kirkland, whom I trust will use good judgement and honor._

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><p><em>The land will be divided as decided by the nations' leaders, but the seaport of Kaliningrad will be given as promised to Gilbert and Ludwig Weilschmidt. My home will be given to the Baltic States as their own home.<em>

_My vodka stash...will remain intact (it keeps a good long time). If any bottle has gone missing, I'll find who did it, and if I'm in hell, I'll drag you down with me, and if in heaven, I'll pee on you. (haha!) I'll leave it to Toris to decide if is alright to drink one bottle a year, and when._

_Eduard Von Brock will be in charge of my library of books, and my ancient literature, as I know he will take very good care of it. Thank you Eduard for your many years of service to me, I never have stopped appreciating it. You're very brilliant, I hope you know._

_Raivis Galante will be given the duty of taking care of my sunflowers, as he found them very lovely, and enjoyed taking care of them. Raivis, you have been an amazing person I've known, and I'm happy to think of you as my little brother, or perhaps my own kin. I know you were afraid of me, and I'm sorry, but please know that I tried to do what was best for you. Do not be afraid anymore, because I know you really are brave._

_My two beloved sisters will be given my old clothes from when I was a child, and all of the photographs in my possession that they may wish to keep. They will also be able to have ownership of my vacation home in the western part of Europe. I'm sorry I have nothing else to give to you but my love. I love seeing you every day, and I will miss seeing your faces when I depart. Please keep me in your heart, and love me forever. I love you both, and won't ever stop._

_P.S. Natty, please take care of Sunflower. I know you've always liked him. P.P.S. Don't feed him turkey, or he'll get worms. And he hates yak milk._  
><em>P.P.P.S Katyusha, I don't say it enough, but thank you for caring for me when I was young. I love you so much, and I'm grateful of the sacrifices you made for me to grow big.<em>

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><p><em>Yao Wang will be given the deed to my vacation home in Asia, and the ancient wood desk in my study. I know he had envied it. Yao, even if you don't love me anymore, I'm not angry. I still care for you, and I wish the best for you. Oh by the way, I still have the stuffed pandas you gave me, would you like them?<em>

_Toris Lorinaitis, my love, I am sorry to have left you now, when I loved you the most of all. I hope that wherever I end up, I still get to watch over you, fondly, every day._

_I remember the day that I first met you, by the bridge. I remember that cute puppy you had...I remember how sad you were when he died some years later. We buried him in the woods, remember? I thought I could get you a new puppy for your birthday, but Katyusha said no. So she helped me make a stuffed one for you. I remember how happy you were, and how you kept it with you all the time. When you got older though, I didn't see you carry it as much. I guess you just put it away somewhere or lost it. Oh well._

_But anyway, the day I met you, I knew you were going to be my friend forever. I knew you'd stay with me forever, and I'd see you again. And the day I got stronger, I took you with me, and we became friends. I was never so happy in my entire life then, having a friend like you._

_The day I learned I was going to die, I was scared. And I was scared because I was afraid of losing you, Toris. I love you more than anything, and I didn't want to die knowing I didn't have you anymore._

_In my secret safe, in my study, there is my savings, a few precious belongings that I'd like to have buried with me, and something for you. It was supposed to be a present for you, my Toris. It is a ring. Before any of this happened, I had the idea of asking you to marry me, but when I realized that I was dying, I knew that it would be too devastating for us to marry, and for me to die so soon. It would have been too unfair and heart breaking. But I would like you to keep it, Toris._

_I love you so much, please don't doubt it._

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><p><em>Francis Bonnefoy, please stay out of my old wooden chest in my bedroom (the one labeled "Toys"). You are allowed to keep only my old boots, and a lamp. That's what you get for scaring me on Halloween. But don't worry, I'm still your friend!<em>

_Arthur Kirkland will be given the many little potion bottles I snuck from his house in the last hundred years. I didn't use any, I swear! Just promise me you'll take good care of your family, alright?_

_As for Peter Kirkland, since a growing nation needs to keep warm, will be given one of my coats of his choice. The rest of my coats will either need to be donated or stored safely with one of my sisters. I'd like to be buried in one of them. Sealand, don't give up on being a nation, because that dream will come true someday, just be patient. By the way, since you parent's names are so hard to spell, I'll just write that they can take my old wooden rocking chairs, and some of my Christmas decorations._

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><p><em>Alfred Jones, my good friend, I leave to you my medals and whatever vehicles I have kept in safety. I know how much you like planes, and I think there is an old one I have somewhere that you can keep. Just take good care of it, and don't let it fall apart. You are one of the best friends I've ever had, and I don't want to leave, I really don't. I'm so sorry to have to hurt you, leaving you and everyone else so soon. But please do remember, you'll always be my friend.<em>

_But now...I have a request for you._

_I am really hoping you haven't buried me yet by the time you read this, but my last request, my last wish is this..._

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><p><em>Bury me in the sunflowers.<em>

_Remember Alfred, the sunflower field we went to in Kansas? I want to be buried there, in the perfect spot. That way, I can always be surrounded in a warm sunflower field. Don't worry about finding the perfect spot, because I already marked it there for you to find, with something special. You do not have to put a grave marker or anything there, just put me in a casket, or whatever you wish (I wouldn't actually care if you just threw me in a hole, and piled dirt on me) and let me sleep in the sunflowers._

_You wouldn't have to worry about visiting it often or whatever to put flowers on it since I'll be under them endlessly. Well, unless the sunflowers die, but you know what I'm saying._

_To be buried in the sunflowers, is my final, dying wish. Please, I hope it comes true..._

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><p><em>Well...that's about it I think. If there's anything else I've forgotten, please do come to diplomatic terms on it...I don't want to have to drag someone down with me, kolkolkol...<em>

_I suppose that now it's getting near the end, since I can't really hold on much longer, I should probably say somethings...I have one final confrontation with Winter, it seems, and then I'm allowing myself to just relax. Winter can never reach the afterlife. My body is too tired and weak to carry on for much longer, and the next time I fall asleep, I probably won't wake up... I know that my leaders will sign the nation off soon, so I don't really have a choice for what happens now. Just know I care about all my fellow nations very much, and I'm so sorry for the pain I have caused. If I could ever go back and time to fix it, I wouldn't hesitate._

_I do have one final quote to say on dying. I wasn't able to find a quote that really suited me in Russian, so I was able to find one from some American man, whom I don't know a thing about. Alfred would probably know, but I'm completely lost on who he is. But this quote, in some way, reflects my thoughts:_

_'I know it is coming, and I do not fear it, because I believe there is nothing on the other side of death to fear. I hope to be spared as much pain as possible on the approach path. I was perfectly content before I was born, and I think of death as the same state. What I am grateful for is the gift of intelligence, and for life, love, wonder, and laughter. You can't say it wasn't interesting. My lifetime's memories are what I have brought home from the trip. I will require them for eternity no more than that little souvenir of the Eiffel Tower I brought home from Paris.'_  
><em>Roger Ebert<em>

_I suppose it is best to tell you now that the leaders are planning to sign the documents in the very early morning. I am not afraid, as I know I will be asleep, and at peace, dreaming of all my friends, around me, smiling, and wishing me well._

_I love you all so much..._

_Please do not be sad for me, I am happy to have known you all, and I will miss you. Remember me fondly, and please live on as the wonderful nations you are._

_Я тебя люблю_

_Vanya_

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><p><strong>Read and review or Ivan will rise from the dead, and drag everyone into hell.<strong>


	20. The Final Spot

**Sorry for the wait. Short, but I was kind of lost...Read and Review or Ivan returns as an evil zombie.**

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><p>All the nations read the document, and sat in silence, neither happy, nor sad. Just...bittersweet. These last few days, Ivan knew he was going to die very soon. So he had written this will very recently it seems. Lithuania took the document from across the table, and looked at the date, "It's the exact same day before he died. And look...on the back, he wrote his birthdate, and death date..."<p>

"So he knew..." mumbled Latvia. He fidgeted with his hands, trying to think of something to say. Because if he said something sad, everyone would cry, but if he said something cheerful, everyone would get mad. Lithuania sat in absolute disbelief, about ready to tear his heart in two. Russia wanted to marry him...but he never got to...Toris...if he had the chance...he would have said yes. He loved Ivan more than anything, and always would.

He left the room to handle his emotion, went to his room, and sat on the bed until he knew he wouldn't cry. He then went to Ivan's room, and in the drawer, sure enough, was a velvet box. Opening it, Toris found a small gold ring. He shook as he felt it in his hand, and putting it back in the box, he put the box in his pocket, and returned to the table with everyone else.

France was in disbelief and pouted, "He didn't leave me the toys? Just some boots and a lamp? That prank wasn't THAT ba-" He was shut up by a look from England, who was writing down the information from the will. He was a little nervous, knowing that when he got home, he'd have to tell Sealand, who didn't know just yet what had happened. Sealand and Russia had become pretty good friends since the run away attempt, and being a young boy, Sealand would probably take it pretty hard.

England ran a hand through his blond hair, "I suppose...I suppose after the funeral or whatever it is we do, that we can deal with this all...but let's focus on what Russia has asked us to do...America, you do realize that he's asked you to let us bury him in Kansas, right?"

"Yes." mumbled Alfred, not looking up. He was staring down at his lap, eyes uncertain in emotion to the other nations.

"And you know that there might be a political statement in that, if not considered by the other nations, our bosses?" continued the Brit, knowing there were definitely some less than desirable opinions about burying a dead nation's embodiment in another nation's land, especially one that it had fought once.

"I don't really care about the politics in it. My boss won't know shit about it. It's Ivan we're talking about, not Russia."

"...so...are you?" asked Kiku, who was staring blankly, confused.

Alfred said nothing for a while. And the silence was honestly rather unsettling for everyone. Because the American was absolutely still, and not even reacting. However, soon enough, they heard what sounded like a chuckle emit from his lips, and saw him shake his head as if he had heard something corny. He looked up and said with a knowing smirk, "A movie critic. He picked a quote from an _American_ movie critic."

Everyone tilted their heads, seeing the smile creeping on Alfred's still red and tear stained face, "He could have picked a quote from a tsar, some Russian philosopher, or some conqueror, but he picked a quote from a guy who reviews movies for the Chicago Tribune. I _knew_ he liked Americans somehow. I knew it!" laughed America. He had found this rather uplifting. Because if it was any other time, Ivan would have gotten on his soapbox to voice his hatred for the capitalist land of America, but Alfred knew now. He knew that ever since Ivan became his friend, they knew each other better...and they cared. In the end, Ivan was still his friend.

"So ah...Alfred." started France, "What do you agree to?"

Alfred flicked a little hair out of his eyes, "I'd have to ask Em.", and then asked to Katyusha and Natalia, "Do you think you two can come to Kansas this upcoming week?"

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><p>"Alfred, are we there yet?" complained Natalia with a pout as the car sped on the Kansas road. The journey had been rather tiring for her and Katyusha, especially since the plane had touched down the other day. Alfred felt bad that he wasn't able to give them the full tour of Kansas, but they had more important things to worry about now. They had to find the field.<p>

"Sweetie, if I told you once, I'll tell you again, we're almost there." answered Kansas, rolling her eyes as she looked out the window. Natalia was really annoying for her. She looked to her dad and said with a sympathetic voice, "Sorry again to hear about your friend Pa. He was a real nice guy it seemed. But if we find the sunflowers, then I bet he'd be happy 'eh?"

Alfred smiled weakly, "Thanks sweetie."

"Thank you for your generosity Kansas." started Katyusha, who was looking out at the hills with near teary eyes. She wasn't so sure that she wanted Ivan to be buried here, since it was usually tradition to bury the dead in graves or in tombs. But Ivan had really asked for this in his will. He was her little brother, and she loved him more than she could imagine. It tore a hole in her heart to have to see him dying, and hear he was dead, but she knew he was in a better place. She could almost imagine him picking sunflowers left and right in a big happy field, like when he was a little kid. And deep down, up to the end, he always was a little kid. So she hoped he was happy.

Natalia took it a little rough, but not as awful as everyone thought she would. She was just as devastated as Katyusha was to see Ivan die, but she knew that in the end, it was for the better. She had seen her precious brother's body, and she saw he was smiling, so she knew he went peacefully. So he must be happy wherever he was.

And what seemed to be an eternity finally ended when Alfred slowed the car down, and parked on a patch of gravel. Katyusha looked around, and raised an eyebrow in confusion. There was no sunflowers, where Alfred was parked. She had imagined a gold plethora of waving petals, smiling at them all, but all she could see was dead shriveled stalks of brown, and she could see in between the rows, since they were so skinny.

"Since it's so close to winter, the flowers have died. They'll come back soon." explained Emma, who was unbuckling her seatbelt.

Natalia pouted, "I wanted to see the sunflowers...I'm not so sure I want to have dear brother buried here if he's going to be under a dead field."

"Natty, relax." chided Alfred, who got out his camera, "I have pictures of them from when we were here. He said they were the most beautiful sunflowers he'd seen."

Katyusha tilted her head in thought, and began to look around, "So he said we'd be able to find the perfect spot...but where?"

"He probably marked something?" suggested Em, who picked at a hang nail. She thought of how much of a pain it would be to bury someone in a sunflower field, and how to tend it. They'd have to bury him really deep...

Alfred scratched his head, "Just scour the field?"

Everyone sighed. Katyusha flexed her wrists anxiously, "Well, I guess that's just it. Natalia you take some rows, I'll take some rows, Emma takes some rows, and Alfred can take some too..."

So everyone went into the dead field, looking for whatever signs or such that they could find, pointing them to where Ivan had plotted his resting place. Katyusha and Natalia scoured the end rows, noticing how dead and dry the flowers were, petals shriveled and brown, as if the life had been vacuumed out of them. But nothing out of the ordinary was visible. Emma simply looked into them from the outside of the rows. The dead stalks did not have a friendly way of inviting her in, and they looked rather gross.

Soon enough, they saw Alfred's hand swiping through the air from one of the center rows, and heard him cry, "Hey guys come here! Come here!"

Everyone soon began elbowing their way through the dried stalks, rushing towards the spot Alfred was motioning to. They soon found him looking at the ground, to a bundle of stalks, tied together, the dead sunflowers thorned into each other. No doubt they had been fresh flowers before when bundled together. A long tan scarf tied the bundle, in a messy bow. Alfred shifted the weight on his feet as he contemplated, "His scarf...he told me he put it in his suitcase...but it's here...he used his scarf..."

Natalia noticed, "Looks like he picked the center of the field! Brother will have even amounts of sunflowers all over!"

Katyusha sighed, sadly, seeing the last remaining piece of Ivan having been tied to plants, and enduring the storms, dirt, heat, and cold for at least three months. It was faded, and dirty, and no doubt wet from all the moisture, but it was still Ivan's scarf.

Natalia grabbed for it, to take home, but Alfred motioned for her to wait, "I need to mark it so we can get it ready...when's the funeral planned?"

"Next week sometime...we'll have the service in Russ-...the land that was once Russia, and then we'll have a burial here..." sighed Katyusha. It was getting hard for her, since it had been less than a week since...this.

Alfred patted her back. This wasn't really easy for anybody. He looked at the dead stalks.

Soon enough, they'd all be blooming and green.

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><p><strong>Return of Russia's scarf!<strong>


	21. Dosvidaniya

**Last chapter! Thank you for all who supported me through this story, and for reading and reviewing! And please still do! **

**Read and review or there'll be zombies.**

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><p>"I'm not so sure about being acknowledged as a nation anymore."<p>

"What? Why?" asked the Englishman, as he shaved off his morning stubble with the hotel razor. He was still tired from the London-Moscow flight last night, but today was the funeral, so he'd have to look nice. And what made it even more stressful was the fact that they'd be on another plane tomorrow to go to Kansas for the burial.

Peter sat on the edge of his hotel bed, wearing the clothes he picked for the funeral. He honestly hated wearing suits, but they did make him feel more important. His hair was neatly combed, and he was wearing nice shoes. He had woken up far earlier than Arthur had that morning, and got dressed on his own, but now it seemed, he had some free time. If he had traveled with his parents though, it might have been less boring. Too bad they couldn't make the night flight.

Arthur asked again, "Peter, why would you stop trying to be a nation now?"

Peter bit his lip, "You know why. Nations aren't immortal so it seems. I don't want to end up becoming a large country like Russia, only to end up dying."

Arthur sighed, "Sealand, it's a rarity that a nation dies. Russia's problems were caused by such radical causes that it's almost certainly never going to happen again."

Peter stared, his blue eyes boring a hole in the carpet almost.

He finished shaving, and put on his shirt, "Besides," he continued, buttoning the front, "he was an older nation, and death is simply a natural part of li-"

He was stopped by the boy's hand's gripping his shirt, "But you're older than him! What does that say huh?"

Arthur realized bringing age into the reasoning had been a bad idea. It was true, he was already a functioning land by the time Russia was born, and since Ivan had died, much younger than him, he may just as well count the time he has left. But instead he said, gently removing the boy's hands from his shirt,

"Then I'm lucky to have lived this long, and I'm planning to stay around for a while Peter. Ivan wouldn't want you worrying, remember what he said in his letter?"

Peter didn't answer, just gave a silent nod, not looking up. After hesitating a few seconds though, he reached forward, and clung to his older brother in a hug,

"Don't _you_ go anywhere, jerk."

"Don't worry." smiled Arthur, ruffling his brother's hair, "I won't."

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><p>"Alfred?" piped up the shaggy blond haired man. Alfred snapped out of his daze with a 'hm?', and perked his eyes upward to see the British gentlemen looking at him, green eyes shining with bittersweet lament.<p>

"Do you want to say something?"

"Oh...um..." Alfred looked down at the rectangular dirt mounded in front of him. It was noticeably darker than the rest of the earth around it, perhaps from the fact it was originally embedded into the ground. It was dug out the day before, seven feet down into the earthy soil. It was somewhat a jagged dig, since the ground was pretty hard from the nearing winter cold. But once the deed was done, the dirt was pushed back over into place, fitting in snugly. It had been deepened an extra foot, because the plants needed room to grow over the casket. The large box was very smooth, wood of a pine tree that was polished and stained to a nice milk chocolate color. The interior was simple fabric, much like the fabric on a quilt or baby blanket, but puffier and soft. Ivan always liked soft things, wether it be rabbits, blankets, or cotton. It gave him a sense of security at times, since the softness often detracted away from the cold. Ivan lay in it, his face having not changed from when he last closed his eyes. He was not wearing a fancy suit like someone would usually be buried in. Instead, he was in one of his favorite sweaters, the one with the brown earthy weaves of yarn. He was also in some dress pants, and one of his old pairs of beloved boots. His coat was on, but unbuttoned, billowing out, around the inside of the coffin bed. And covering the pale scarred skin of his neck, was his beloved scarf, cleaned and looking good as new to be reunited with its owner forever. Inside, also lay some fresh cut sunflowers that Ukraine had found, some photographs he had owned, including one of Anastasia, and the beloved sunflower pin was buttoned onto his sweater, and the beautiful sunflower quilt lay folded under his head like a pillow. Hair neatly brushed, and looking peaceful, Ivan was ready to go to sleep once more.

"...um...uh..." started Alfred, who cleared his throat, "Um, well, Ivan, I guess this is it. This is what you asked us to do, and well uh...we did it. Not much to say there. Other than the sunflowers will be nice when they actually grow."

"Alf, you're talking to dirt." huffed Gilbert with an eyeroll, which earned him a glare from Ludwig, whose hands were stained with powdery dirt from his work on burying the coffin.

"Oh, you want me to say something about him, not to him...uh...um...well...Ivan...Ivan...was an awesome friend. He really listened to people when he wanted to, and he really cared about his friends. I think he didn't like to admit it much, but I bet he really liked us all. I remember during WW2...no offense Ludwig...that he'd volunteer to stay up all night, and stay on guard for anything suspicious. Every so often, I'd wake up hearing him humming some little Russian tunes or something, and he looked really happy. He told me it was because he was thinking of how he'd destroy us all one day, but my translation I think is that he was happy to help his friends. Don't ask me how I translated that, I just can. So I just really hope that he's not too lonely up there, and that the weather is good."

Everyone quietly nodded or smiled at Alfred's little speech, and Arthur gave a little guesture, to show that he wanted to speak next.

"Ivan was special, in a good way. He didn't really care much about what other people thought of him, and he wasn't afraid to be different...usually. He liked some pretty bizarre things, which were probably even worse than my habits. But he wasn't afraid to be himself it seemed...but there was the times it did. I knew that the real Ivan was very different from the one we saw a lot. He was difficult to get to know, but once you did, he was pretty hard to dislike it seemed. He was not the person you could assume that you could trust, but once it really came through, you'd know you could rely on him. He ah...didn't really ask for much. Just helping us, I think it just made him really happy. So, ah...Ivan, even if you were a bloody git, you weren't half a bad bloke."

Francis simply said, "He was a good cook."

Everyone turned to look, and he explained, "He had quite a touch for baking. We'd exchange homemade food every so often. Whatever he hadn't poisoned tasted magnifique. He had skill with making desserts it seemed."

Eduard chuckled a little, "That's a far cry from when he tried to make borscht. He nearly set the kitchen on fire. A huge fireball came out of the pot. "

Raivis spoke, without shivering, "And it singed his eyebrows?"

"Haha, yeah." he mused.

Yao bit his lip, and simply said, "He was big enough to imitate a panda, so I was able to cuddle the big guy like nuts, aru. He had good appreciation for Chinese culture, and good taste in food. He liked eating dim sum a lot aru. Whenever Chinese New Year came around, he'd come visit me, and we'd set off some firecrackers and watch the festivities in the streets. He really liked them aru..."

The Chinese man then licked his dry mouth, "I...I still care for him aru."

Raivis mused, "Ivan liked to read a lot, so sometimes he'd go to this little used book shop in the villa, and buy some little pocket books to read or whatever he could find that seemed the slightest bit interesting, since they were pretty inexpensive. Every so often, he'd buy some romance novellas or something."

"What would he do with those?" asked Peter

"He usually read three pages of them, then put them to the side to read a mystery novel or something. So he'd let me take them to read. But he insisted up to the very end that they were his." he chuckled, then continued, looking down at the grave, "One weekend, he dragged me there, for some 'master-subordinate bonding time' as he called it. I was really terrified, since that usually meant he was going to maul me. But we just ended up walking in there, and he just started looking at all the books. I was standing there like a bogged out gargoyle or something, not really sure what the hell was going to happen. He then told me I could look around if I wanted. So I retreated to an aisle that was far away from where he was. I decided to look at the romance books. And after a little browsing, I found a huge paper grocery back full of all these paperback romance books. I really wanted to buy them. Ivan found me there in the aisle, looking through the bag of books, and took it from me, and said, "Thanks for finding me some books, da?" I couldn't really protest or anything, so I let him take them. Oh well, it wasn't much of a deal, since I'd get to look at them eventually. We were leaving the shop when he handed me the huge bag. I asked him why he was handing them to me, and he said, "They're yours, da? I hate romance novels anyway." I was really happy that he let me keep them. I hit the jackpot there, I'd just read one after another every night in bed. That was until Ivan went into my room, and found all the books scattered on the floor and under my bed. Now I have to keep them in the library...well I used to have to keep them there..."

"And you still are. The library is going to remain tidy." quipped Eduard, adjusting his glasses, "I remember when Ivan found these things, after I took them off for a sec, and was wearing them, going around bumping into things. I finally got them off him before he fell down the stairs."

"Ve~ Ivan scared the crap out of me-ow!" cried Feliciano, earning him a slap on the head from Kiku, "VE! Let me finish! -but he wasn't a bad guy. He liked pasta, and his tourists weren't as annoying as Germany's! But his women looked like men and they-"

"WE GET IT." replied everyone present.

"His name copied mine." grumbled Gilbert, "But imitation is the best form of flattery, which means he thought I was awesome! Kesesesesese!"

"He didn't fight dirty." added Ludwig.

"His clothing was pretty tacky, but his scarf was like so totally fab." mused Feliks, dressed in frilly pink, despite the somewhat somber occasion.

"His nose was so cute!" cooed Antonio, whose reflection raised an eyebrow or two, "It's true, it was cute and pudgy!"

"Big brother was _NOT_ pudgy!" warned Natalia.

"His nose was, and it was cutely so!"

Toris bit his lip, and said with a look of shame, "I don't know what to say..."

Alfred patted him on the back, "It's okay, the big guy understands."

Katyusha wiped her eyes a little, and taking a photograph out of her bag, she sniffed, "This was a picture I took of Ivan a few months ago. Natalia made him sit at a tea par-"

Natalia glared.

"A...um...sibling bonding time, and he wore the bear ears. He looked so cute in them. He's still my baby brother after all of this. I loved him more than anything, and I still do."

"Me too..." started Natalia, looking at the fresh grave, "I know he never wanted to marry me...well _now_ I do, but I still loved him. And he loved me. I just hope he remembers us after all this time passes."

Everyone nodded. After that, it was quiet a little, simple silence, as the nations simply looked down at the grave in front of them. It would remain unmarked, since it was a field of plants, but outside the field, in the grass by the road, they had put a smooth large rock on the ground. Painted on it was a large beautiful sunflower, courtesy of Lovino's beautiful painting skills. The strokes of paint let the petals whisper in golden airy flames or tongues. And the center was a dark, rich shine of brown. Next to the flower, in white, Arthur had drawn a cute cariacture of Ivan as he used to during the Allies meetings, smiling at the sunflower happily. The paints and drawings would remain for a long time, since the rock had been carefully sealed with material and work. Written in white on the rock, in Russian, then English below it, read:

_**In memory of Ivan, who wished all people could be like sunflowers; tall, growing, and radiating warmth and happiness. May that wish come true.**_

Soon enough, everyone left the field, to their respective hotels or flights. But as they exited, they looked on the grass strip, at the stone marker. And nobody, not even Gilbert, could resist smiling.

It was just what Ivan wanted.

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><p><strong>EARLIER BEFORE, EARLY MORNING, DAY X<strong>

Ivan's sleepy eyes opened up, as he blearily breathed in. He instinctively gripped the sheets with his hands, and sat up slightly. He dragged himself back a little in bed.

That was when he realized that he could feel his legs brushing across the sheets. Since he had been paralyzed his body had been dragging like a dead weight, but now, it was different. His eyes widened, and still not imagining it, swung his legs over the side of the bed, and stood. He didn't feel any uneasiness in his step. His steps felt light, and graceful, as if he were a graceful, passionate figure skater. He went to his bedroom door, and turned the knob. Opening the door, he adjusted his eyes.

Blinding sunlight sparkled a moment, then tempered out. Ivan couldn't believe his eyes, for in front of him was the largest field of sunflowers he had ever seen. There seemed to be no end to them, as the gold and green waves went on and on.

Ivan felt someone tap his shoulder, and couldn't believe the face in front of him, with the beautiful doe eyes, porcelain doll face, and flowing hair.

"Anastasia?"

"Hello Ivan. It's time to go."

"Go where?"

"Home Ivan. With me." she smiled, taking his hand, as she gently pulled him through the sunflower field.

"Oh Anastasia, I've missed you so much." he smiled, tears flowing in his eyes. He looked down, and saw he was now wearing his favorite set of traditional Russian clothes. He felt so free, and warm.

"I've missed you too, Ivan. But now we can be together forever."

Ivan smiled, and as the sunflowers brushed at him, tickling very lightly. The sun glowed brilliantly. Ivan felt free enough to lift his feet off the ground, and soar towards the peaceful glow.

Smiling more than he ever had before, violet sparkling, Ivan blissfully reached out to touch the sunlight.

**THE END**

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><p><strong>Once again, thank you everyone! I'll be writing more in the future!<strong>


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